Old Trafford Farm, Manchester: The ring-leader of some muddied oafs who chase a bladder of wind across a farm meadow for a living, has got into trouble. Farmer Ferguson is his name and he has been shouting and getting red faced over Christmas. Rum...
In a bid to reduce emissions from the vast fleet of buses that operate in and around the Manchester area, Greater Manchester Public Transport Limited have come up with a winning initiative that promises to not only slash exhaust emissions, but reduce...
Manchester has been voted England's "sexiest" city in a poll conducted by someone with way too much time on their hands. Back and to the Lefts hometown of Hull didn't even make the top twenty, which is a shame. Syphilis first cases in England were di...
A Surrey nobleman had a disappointing night out during his first weekend visit to Manchester.
Knight of the Realm Sir Alfred Prufrock ended up on the pavement outside the Toffzarowt Night Club.
Sir Alfred went in all dressed up in his fancy ge...
The disruption to the fuel pipeline between Ellesmere Port and Manchester Airport has led to massive delays at the terminal, but there has been an unexpected knock on effect as the M56 has clogged up with aircraft heading for a nearby service station...
A report released today revealed that the vast majority of Manchester United fans remain in a state of shock, following Sunday's explosive climax to the Premier League season, as Manchester City scored twice in the final two minutes of added time, th...
Three of the cities that held referendums on the introduction of elected mayors have so far rejected the idea:
In Nottingham, 57.09% of voters decided against it.
Comment:
"It's perfectly understandable really. If the proletariat of Nottingham had to turn out to vote for a mayor, they would have less time for shoplifting, benefit claiming, and also they'd risk getting themselves shot by one o...
In a stunning last minute development, it's just been announced that the keenly anticipated Manchester Derby has just been cancelled, leaving Sir Alex Ferguson "gutted and as sick as a parrot."
The hottest ticket in town just a few hours ago is no...
The Manchester Marathon was won today by a forty-two year old woman from Salford called Annette Fisher.
"I hadn't even realised I'd entered the marathon," said Ms Fisher. "I'd hung my bed sheets out on the line because it was quite windy and I th...
Droylsden FC, a not-quite-professional football club from east Manchester playing in the Conference North has lost the final of the Manchester Senior Cup without ever kicking a ball.
The game, scheduled for last week, was postponed when Droylsden...
Manchester City insiders today revealed that City boss, Roberto 'The Scarf' Mancini (Unkindly referred to in some quarters as 'Mankini') has vowed to eat his own scarf if City fail in their bid to land the league title for the first time since the ha...
MONDAY - As Manchester United pulled four points clear in the Premiership title race, with a 5-0 victory over Wolves at Molineux, with goals courtesy of Evans, Valencia, Welbeck, and a brace from Chicharito, thus reducing the Goal Difference between...
European Finance Ministers held an early morning crisis meeting in Brussels today, in order to discuss the implications for the Eurozone after both Manchester clubs crashed out of the Europa League football tournament on Thursday evening.
Minister...
Controversial (understatement) Italian footy star, Mario Balotelli, has decided to remain anonymous whilst up to his rather naughty antics around the Manchester area. He claims the publicity is just too much when he's acting like a moron; albeit, he'...
The UN have officially declared certain areas of the UK suburbs of LA. It seems that these "no-go" areas are homing "Homies" of drug gangs and cartels similar to their parent gangs in the US and especially LA.
Here are just a few of the friendly b...
Police are investigating the daring raid of an ATM, completely emptying it. The thieves, dubbed the Manchester Moles, dug a five hundred foot tunnel from an embankment to the shopping centre ATM; working only between midnight and five in the morning...
The proposed high speed rail link between London and Manchester, with the shortest possible stay in Birmingham as is technically feasible, has been given the green light to be built, despite opposition.
However, protesters against the new rail lin...
Two femme Fatales were arrested by the police yesterday after their daring robbery was foiled by most high tech (and unstoppable) of police tactics. The stationary, highly visible security camera.
The two woman gang, made up of Rose "The Flowerpo...