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Funny satire stories about Malls

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Funny story: Queensland mall rat squad gets new name

Queensland mall rat squad gets new name

The new squad created by the Queensland police to deal with the growing problem of mall rats has been given a new name. The squad of 50 full time front-line officers equipped with specialised equipment, including digital encrypted radio equipment...
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Funny story: Mall's erroneous "You Are Here" signs result in mass confusion

Mall's erroneous "You Are Here" signs result in mass confusion

Several hundred shoppers became disoriented inside a local shopping mall this afternoon, saying erroneous "You Are Here" arrows led them to believe they were there when they really weren't. The confused shoppers were later safely led out of the mall...
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Funny story: Town's shopping mall plans put on ice

Town's shopping mall plans put on ice

Plans for a massive new shopping mall in Arbroath have been put on ice. A somewhat frosty approval for the 20-megastore complex was given begrudgingly by the Highlands District Council in February last year. But local traders argued that they didn...
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Funny story: Old Woman Lost Inside Mall For 30 Years

Old Woman Lost Inside Mall For 30 Years

King of Prussia, PA-- An 85-year old spinster has finally found the exit door of the mall after 30 years of looking. Miss Vicki Smegma walked into the Mega Mall on December 24, 1982 and became hopelessly lost. After decades of wandering around she...
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Funny story: Donald Trump To Acquire Central Park And Build The World's Largest Mall

Donald Trump To Acquire Central Park And Build The World's Largest Mall

MANHATTAN - Word filtering out of Trump Towers is that billionaire Donald Trump is finalizing plans to purchase New York City's world famous Central Park. The 843-acre park which was built in 1857, served as a staging area during the Civil War for...
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Funny story: Teen hassling mall cop is unaware of his fate

Teen hassling mall cop is unaware of his fate

Santa Fe, New Mexico - Dirk Johnson, 16, and known to his friends and himself as a "bad boy", spends most of his time giving grief to a local mall security guard. Dirk is blissfully unaware of his fate. Dirk does rather poorly in school, mainly f...
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Funny story: Shopping for a New Suit

Shopping for a New Suit

I think that I pissed off some people yesterday. Of course, for folks who come into contact with me, this is not something rare or new. I need a new suit. I got too fat to wear my older ones (and they were old and dying anyway) and was down to just two tweed sportcoats. Since winter is approaching, I wanted at least one new suit now for church, weddings, funerals, and just looking studely in...
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Breaking News...

Donald Trump fails to sign pledge not to run for King in 2016

Republican presidential hopeful, Donald Trump, announced Today that he has not signed a pledge not to run for King.
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