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Red Top mobile hacking drama 'spreads to Maddie phone'

Funny story: Red Top mobile hacking drama 'spreads to Maddie phone'

London - A November 2009 spoof news story that 'Maddie cellphone starts bleeping from China' may have triggered attempts to hack into her mobile, QM NewsCorpse sources learned tonight. Madeleine McCann's May 2007 disappearance remains unsolved des...

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McCanns Unlikely To Stand Alongside Katie Price In Sick Joke Rumpus

Funny story: McCanns Unlikely To Stand Alongside Katie Price In Sick Joke Rumpus

Gerry and Kate McCann, whose daughter Madeleine was abducted from Praia De Luz, Portugal in 2007, appear highly unlikely to align themselves alongside Katie Price, as the former page three model wages a war against sick jokes. Especially those mad...

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Red tops drag Little Maddie into Joanna Yeates funeral

Funny story: Red tops drag Little Maddie into Joanna Yeates funeral

Bristol - (R.I.Pizza): Morning headlines in today's Daily Smearer have confirmed the nation's worst fears. News of 'Our Jo's' parents' alignment with Kate and Gerry McCann has startled many, including lawyers for Vincent Tabak. Readers are gobs...

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Chandlers staying mum about reported Maddie sightings

Funny story: Chandlers staying mum about reported Maddie sightings

Mogadishu - (Praia da Iluzion Mess): The yachting couple said today they had read a story last year that the missing Rothley child had been seen aboard a boat 'in Mogadishu'. But Paul and Rachel Chandler refused to spill the beans ahead of the fo...

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Pope's Portugal trip 'to look for Maddie'

Funny story: Pope's Portugal trip 'to look for Maddie'

Algarve - (Praia Da Iluzion): The four day stay will see Pope Benedick re-enact the tumultuous welcome the McCanns received at St Peter's in Rome in 2007. Prayers at the Our Lady of Fatima shrine will continue to beseech for church secrecy in all...

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Portuguese court told Little Maddie's face 'appears on a tortiilla!'

Funny story: Portuguese court told Little Maddie's face 'appears on a tortiilla!'

Praia Da Iluzion - (Rotters): The 10-inch diameter flatbread has been presented in evidence complete with an image of what may or may not be little Maddie McCann. Her face appeared on the tortilla after it was stuffed with a mixture of humbug and...

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Kate McCann 'pregnant again'

Funny story: Kate McCann 'pregnant again'

Leicestershire - (Reuterus): Astrologers have described Kate McCann as 'pregnant again' following the LCROSS rocket's cosmic impact on the Moon in September. Analysis of the forty-something Rothley doctor's chart apparently shows the lunar smash h...

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Maddie cellphone starts bleeping from China

Funny story: Maddie cellphone starts bleeping from China

London - (Praia Da Illuzion): Officially, Portuguese detectives never found the pay-as-you-go mobile which Maddie may have accidentally smuggled on holiday inside her cuddle cat. This weekend it suddenly popped up in Beijing after Interpol teleco...

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Somali pirates behind Maddie McCann ransom demand?

Funny story: Somali pirates behind Maddie McCann ransom demand?

Seychelles - (Fishy Tales): The $10 million demand had been kept secret via a UK tabloid spoiler campaign of 'Africanised Maddie' age-progressed images. These show a dusky Madeleine on board a Mogadishu registered phishing smack as it trawls the b...

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Maddie McCann conceived via IVF donor embryo? Nah...

Funny story: Maddie McCann conceived via IVF donor embryo? Nah...

Rothley - (Sunny Side Up): 'Maddie a triplet, conceived from a donated embryo,' Halo! magazine sources claimed today as Praia da Iluzion wingnuts' latest whopper began doing the rounds. The story speculates she has 'disappeared' to join her identi...

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Lisbon Trick Or Treaty? Conspiracy Theorists Blame Maddie McCann-Of-Worms

Funny story: Lisbon Trick Or Treaty? Conspiracy Theorists Blame Maddie McCann-Of-Worms

London - (Pie-in-the-sky)): Wingnuts lobbying for an immediate release of May 2007 US spy-in-the-sky satellite imagery of the Algarve region claim the Pentagon is deliberately blocking release of vital evidence. One tracking expert told reporters...

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Pentagon satellite scans 'show Maddie running to Tapas Bar?'

Funny story: Pentagon satellite scans 'show Maddie running to Tapas Bar?'

Praia da Illuzion - (Pie-in-the-Sky): Kidnap investigators are demanding answers amid astonishing preliminary analysis of US spy-in-the-sky satellite footage. Unconfirmed reports claim to show 'a child running from the McCann Ocean Club Apartment...

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'Maddie was never even in Portugal' book burned

Funny story: 'Maddie was never even in Portugal' book burned

Rothley, Leicestershire - (Red Herring Press): A disgraced Portuguese former cop will see the entire 25,000 copy print run of his memoir burned to cinders after a court ruled it was inflammatory rubbish. Goncalo Amaral's book claimed 'the McCanns...

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Chinese 'spy-in-the-sky' satellite filmed Maddie in Libya?

Funny story: Chinese 'spy-in-the-sky' satellite filmed Maddie in Libya?

Nanjinxed, China - (X-Files): China's Purple Patch Observatory is to release its 2009 solar eclipse footage after a rogue UFO was reassessed as a possible sighting of Madeleine McCann. The 40 second clip shows Maddie dressed in traditional Libya...

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Maddie sighted aboard missing Russian cargo ship

Funny story: Maddie sighted aboard missing Russian cargo ship

Cape Verde, Atlantic Ocean - (WTF? Mess): A call to the BBC's Crimebotch programme has claimed Maddie McCann has been spotted aboard missing Russian cargo ship the Arctic Sea Men which is drifting in the choppy waters off the Azores. The freighter...

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Maddie spotted on Oleg Deripaska's 'Queen K' yacht

Funny story: Maddie spotted on Oleg Deripaska's 'Queen K' yacht

Corfu - (Praia Da Iluzion Mess): Forget cut-price Ozzie millionairess Melissa Karlson's $5 million Sunseeker motorboat tabloid fantasy. Little Maddie McCann was spotted aboard Russian mobster Oleg Deripaska's $200 million 73m ocean-going yacht the...

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The search for Maddie McCann: "We want Victoria Beckham"

Funny story: The search for Maddie McCann: "We want Victoria Beckham"

The search for Madeleine McCann has taken a shocking turn after it was announced they are looking for Victoria Beckham. The McCann family spokesman Clarence Mitchell said: "We are looking for the woman Victoria Beckham." Reporters were sure Mr...

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American Idle judge Victoria Beckham lashes out at McCanns

Funny story: American Idle judge Victoria Beckham lashes out at McCanns

Los Angeles - (Praia Da Illuzion Mess): Paula Abdul substitute Victoria Beckham is rabid at the McCann rumor mill after pictures of an anorexic crop haired lesbo stick insect lookalike were put in the frame in the Maddie disappearance fiasco. Beck...

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Breaking news…

Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President

...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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