New York - Big Apple auctioneers were tutting with disbelief tonight at a Brit tabloid's best guess naming Russian mobster Roman Abramovich as the new owner of the $143million Francis Bacon triptych entitled 'Three Studies of Lucian Fraud'.
London - Described variously as Lucian Fraud's dealer and/or weed man Mr William Acquavella said today the great artist had died.
Speaking to reporters from the Emin Evening Argos the New Yorker confirmed Fraud had died at home in his sleep yester...
London - (Post-Impressionist Mess): Britain's national treasure and renowned living artist Lucian Fraud (sic) has said gangland mobsters the Kray Twins hounded him for money.
"Each time I went for a dump they thought I must be shitting gold bricks...
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An original metaphor:
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