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Halloween fightback! - Pensioners encouraged to join in the fun!

Funny story: Halloween fightback! - Pensioners encouraged to join in the fun!

In a recent campaign by Help The Fogies, pensioners are being encouraged to fight back against the youngsters who traditionally terrorise them under the guise of a 'bit of fun'. Traditionally, in America, Trick or Treat is where children and menac...

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Neurosurgeon Willie Bodgem flees to Bolivia, but the game is up

Funny story: Neurosurgeon Willie Bodgem flees to Bolivia, but the game is up

Following allegations of catastrophic surgical procedures, detectives at Scotland Yard are anxious to locate Dublin neurosurgeon Willie Bodgem. Managers at Beaumont Hospital have distanced themselves from the consultant, telling police that "Mr B...

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The man of the moment, Louis Walsh, talks frankly about his recent brain implant

Funny story: The man of the moment, Louis Walsh, talks frankly about his recent brain implant

Universally known as a bit of a tit, I resolved to bring an open mind to my meeting with Louis Walsh. Only six weeks after his well-publicised brain implant, he agreed to meet for lunch at his favourite greasy spoon in one of Dublin's murkiest back streets. ('I like to keep it real,' he told me inscrutably.) Louis flounced in, 40 minutes late, wearing a rather fetching two-tone green tank top...

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Louis Walsh brain implant rejected, say medics

Funny story: Louis Walsh brain implant rejected, say medics

The heady days of measurable cerebral activity are over for brain implant recipient Louis Walsh, according to Senior Neurologist Willie Bodgem. After several desperate attempts to reconnect disrupted neurotransmitters, Bodgem emerged from Beaumont Ho...

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New brain: "I'm living the dream," says Louis

Funny story: New brain: "I'm living the dream," says Louis

Looking tired but relaxed, Louis Walsh emerged this afternoon from Beaumont Hospital with neurosurgeon Willie Bodgem at his side. Louis waved enthusiastically to no-one in particular as a Private Eye reporter waited, hungry for the first utterance fr...

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Cowell: "It's a no brainer"

Funny story: Cowell: "It's a no brainer"

X Factor Overlord Simon Cowell has finally broken his silence on Louis Walsh's controversial brain implant with characteristically blunt analysis. "Even with the brain of a hamster," mocked the Overlord, "Louis couldn't manage a band of teenage roden...

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Brain implant for Louis Walsh

Funny story: Brain implant for Louis Walsh

A spokesperson from Beaumont Hospital in Dublin confirmed that a small brain implant was successfully performed on X Factor judge Louis Walsh yesterday. The latest information from the hospital suggests that Walsh is recovering well after surgery.

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Louis Walsh's new hair makes him look 40 years younger claims orang-utan hair transplant pioneer

Funny story: Louis Walsh's new hair makes him look 40 years younger claims orang-utan hair transplant pioneer

Following Louis Walsh's surprising new hairstyle as seen on The X-Factor, details are now emerging of the controversial procedure he has undertaken to achieve the effect. And the scientist behind the process, Doctor Ronan Westboys, has spoken out ab...

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OMG - Simon Cowell's bush is shaped like his head

Funny story: OMG - Simon Cowell's bush is shaped like his head

Britain was reeling from the shock news this weekend that Simon Cowell's bush is shaped like his head. Topiarist to the stars Louie Spence said: "Yes it's true dahling, Simon asked me to shape his bush to look like his head. I was shocked at firs...

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Secret To Success Finally Revealed By Simon Cowell

Funny story: Secret To Success Finally Revealed By Simon Cowell

Simon Cowell, high trousered music mogul and inventor of the sarcastic put-down to already inferior people, has sensationally revealed the secret to his fantastic success in everything he does. Parsnips. That's right, parsnips. And lot's of them.

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The Queen Set To Be A Judge On 'The HRH Factor'

Funny story: The Queen Set To Be A Judge On 'The HRH Factor'

Television's flattest headed peddler of crap, Simon Cowell, is in advanced talks with the Queen in an attempt to convince her to be a judge on his new regality show, 'The HRH Factor'. Her majesty actually came up with the idea and pitched it to Co...

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Members of X-Factor winners Little Mix revealed to be judges' love children

Funny story: Members of X-Factor winners Little Mix revealed to be judges' love children

Winners of this year's X-Factor and Simon Cowell's new banking machine, or "Little Micks", as the four-girl group prefers to be known, have been revealed as love children of the entire X-Factor judging panel and more. Jade Thirlwall, who speaks a...

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Irish embassy in uproar over X-Factor finalists

Funny story: Irish embassy in uproar over X-Factor finalists

The Irish Ambassador to the UK has sought urgent talks with Prime Minister David Cameron over the final group in this year's X-Factor, a popular television talent show famed for premium rate telephone voting and pointless competitions, clueless judge...

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Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh go head to head

Funny story: Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh go head to head

There has never been a lot of love lost between Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh, but recently things have taken a turn for the worse. With a string of manufactured boy and girl 'bands' linked to their respective names, the rivalry has been simmering...

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"X-Factor is not a fix" confirm Bookies as they refuse bet on Misha B

Funny story: "X-Factor is not a fix" confirm Bookies as they refuse bet on Misha B

Claims that the X-Factor is a fix have been hotly refuted by Simon Cowell and the self-important and always-nailing-it judges of the 'competition'. Despite bookies refusing to take bets on Misha B or Marcus, who will be the two finalists in this y...

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Fears growing over potential Westlife reunion

Funny story: Fears growing over potential Westlife reunion

The world of showbiz was today rocked to it's very foundations, to its actual core, in fact (get on with it - Editor) er, ok, er with the threatened possibility of a Westlife reunion. Still reeling from the non-split in 2004 when Brian McFadden qu...

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All Change At American X Factor As Cheryl Cole Is Fired And Pippa Middleton Is Hired!

Funny story: All Change At American X Factor As Cheryl Cole Is Fired And Pippa Middleton Is Hired!

The storm surrounding the sensational sacking of Cheryl Cole from American X Factor shows no signs of abating this morning, with the rumour mill working overtime processing and devouring snippet after snippet concerning the amazing axeing of the UK's...

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Girls Aloud Back Without Cheryl

Funny story: Girls Aloud Back Without Cheryl

Girls Aloud have confirmed they are ready to record their next album without Cheryl Cole. The four less famous members, Sarah Harding, Kimberley Walsh, Nadine Coyle and the other one have admitted they can't wait around forever to see whether Cher...

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Breaking news…

Philadelphia Eagles Only Need 2-Passenger Corvette For Official White House Visit After Winning Super Bowl Team

The delegation was the team coach who lost the coin toss and the team driver. The rest boycotted.
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