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DNA from Lake Champlain 'monster' tests positive for Hillary Clinton genome

Funny story: DNA from Lake Champlain 'monster' tests positive for Hillary Clinton genome

New York - A large humped underwater monster, believed to be part Tanystropheus and part freshwater jellyfish, has been DNA tested to reveal close blood ties with presidential wannabe Hillary Clinton. Cryptozoologists trawling the depths around L...

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Governments, Scientists Quick To Deny Nessie Appearance

Funny story: Governments, Scientists Quick To Deny Nessie Appearance

Right after the release of the "Loch Ness" photos from a satellite the "Authorities" were quick to jump in with their own explanations and showed photographs that show that the creature or whatever in the water was a 1. faked photograph. When tha...

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Scientists: Don't Believe Loch Ness Monster on Satellite Pic

Funny story: Scientists: Don't Believe Loch Ness Monster on Satellite Pic

A new and very convincing photo from Apple Satellite of the Loch Ness Monster is drawing a lot of support around the world except from scientists who poo-poo the report. "They can poo-poo all over themselves if they like but people are not going t...

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Submarine searching for MH370 attacked by the Kracken

Funny story: Submarine searching for MH370 attacked by the Kracken

What has been one of the most difficult search and rescue missions in aviation history has just gotten harder. Officials aboard Australian Vessel, "Ocean Shield" confirmed that the unmanned submarine conducting a search for the plane has gone mis...

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Loch Ness Monster "Wrong Size" for new E. U. Regulations

Funny story: Loch Ness Monster "Wrong Size" for new E. U. Regulations

New E.U. Lake Monster regulations taking effect from referendum day 18th September may mean Loch Ness will have to be drained and the monster shortened by 2 metres to bring it in line with 22 other European Lake Monsters, a spokesperson from Brussels...

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Glory Holes to be built into new Scottish homes Outrage

Funny story: Glory Holes to be built into new Scottish homes Outrage

New Scottish houses may have built in "Glory Holes", under plans to improve the home like qualities of new build designs. A proposed new development of 3000 homes along the banks of Loch Ness will each have a glory hole, with larger properties having...

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Katy Perry Says The Highly Erotic Photos of Her Were Meant For John Mayer Only

RENO, Nevada - Katy Perry was visiting an old friend in Reno when she was asked about the recent erotic photos that have been posted on the Internet. Perry looked at the snapshots and was taken aback. She said that her boyfriend, John "The Player"...

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Big turnout for people who are voting about the general issues in their country and the parties who are contesting for power.

Funny story: Big turnout for people who are voting about the general issues in their country and the parties who are contesting for power.

A general erection today for everybody in Britain, and what a big one it was with hundreds of inhabitants turning out in their thousands to vote on the important issues of today. As it were there was a landslide for the nutty natters over 90's nudist...

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Bigfoot Claims to Have Taken Best Picture Yet of Loch Ness Monster

Funny story: Bigfoot Claims to Have Taken Best Picture Yet of Loch Ness Monster

While vacationing in Loch Ness in the Scottish Highlands, Bigfoot, also known as Mr. Sasquatch, reported taking the best photo yet of the storied Loch Ness Monster. Bigfoot, a three-meter-tall-ape-like creature, was visiting Scotland from his home...

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Unconfirmed Reports Claim Massive Skeleton Found At Loch Ness

Unconfirmed reports from Scotland, suggest that a giant skeleton has washed up on the South shore of the famous Loch Ness, the area has been sealed off by Britain's SAS and roads near the Loch have been blocked and police are stopping anyone from get...

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Giant Crab Nicknamed Crabzilla Spotted In Rome, Italy's Sewer System

Funny story: Giant Crab Nicknamed Crabzilla Spotted In Rome, Italy's Sewer System

ROME - Japan has Godzilla, the United States has Sasquatch, Scotland has the Loch Ness Monster, and England has Gordon Ramsay. But up until now Italy was a monsterless nation known primarily for its wine, pizza, the Colosseum, the Alps, Venice, th...

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Year of the Water Dragon: Chinese to buy Loch Ness Monster

Funny story: Year of the Water Dragon: Chinese to buy Loch Ness Monster

Scotland - Chinese Sovereign Fund coffers splashed out a reported $5 billion today on the legendary Scottish beastie just after acquiring a $1 billion 8.8% stake in Thames Water. Superstition-mad Beijing bankers took the view that an incredibly au...

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Thames 'Nessie' lurks outside 2012 Stadium

Funny story: Thames 'Nessie' lurks outside 2012 Stadium

London - "Maybe it's escaped from the Princess Diana Memorial Fountain," is how one wildlife expert assessed the situation this morning. Wildlife shots of the mystery beastie - definitely not doctored by the BBC or David Attenborough - show a Loc...

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Nessy found in Thames

The great Loch Ness Monster has been spotted miles from home on the River Thames in London. It's been a few years since the monster has been seen in Scotland and the sighting in London could prove the reason why. The sighting of the famous monster...

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'Stop Using Loch Ness As A Toilet' aliens told amid UFO 'blue ice' dump

Funny story: 'Stop Using Loch Ness As A Toilet' aliens told amid UFO 'blue ice' dump

Scotland - 'Mayday! Mayday! Extraterrestrial space shit attack!' The SOS message, picked up Saturday evening on marine emergency frequencies, saw Scotland's premier eerie loch trawled by rescue services after locals reported seeing a large blue b...

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Loch Ness Monster AND Bin Laden killed on same day!

Funny story: Loch Ness Monster AND Bin Laden killed on same day!

Has the Loch Ness Monster finally been killed? A Scottish fisherman by the name of Angus McTwinkle claims he caught the monster on Monday but then had to kill it and leave it to sink to the bottom of the Loch. "I called out a warning for Nessie to...

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Corpse found in Diana Memorial Fountain

Funny story: Corpse found in Diana Memorial Fountain

London - "We've been as busy as Beachy Head at Christmas," a Royal Parks Agency police diver commented this afternoon, "what with so many royal wedding invite disappointees looking for a landmark Central London site. "Of course, the Diana Fountain...

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Small Tourist Boat on Lake Windermere Overturned by Lake Monster, Three Missing

Funny story: Small Tourist Boat on Lake Windermere Overturned by Lake Monster, Three Missing

Coming on the heels of a couple who claimed they saw a "Nessie-like' lake creature while out on Lake Windermere in England, it has been reported that something very large has overturned a small boat of tourists who were out to get a glimpse. "We g...

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Breaking news…

Inspector General’s Report Is Out

Much like a school report card, the Inspector General’s report is out and James Comey received an F for failure. Who’ve guess? Because he gave the world Donald Trump, he should have received a Z.
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