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Boomerang Kids Winging Back Home to Disappointed Parents

A study has found that “empty nesters” are beginning to resent “boomerang” kids. Any idea what that means? Nope us neither but we’ll plough on anyway. It’s said that “baby boomers” are tired of “millennials” thinking they know all “the swag” and then...

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Move over FitBit - Introducing tbe ShitFitBit, for Toddlers.

Funny story: Move over FitBit - Introducing tbe ShitFitBit, for Toddlers.

San Jose, CA - Riding the wave of the rise in popularity of fitness trackers, one popular fitness-tracking company is set to release its latest product, ShitFitBit, which is designed to keep track of all your crazy toddler's shit-fits. "Many frant...

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Frozen shampoo injures child

Like many young Disney fans, Tiffany Johnson begged her mother to get her the shampoo with Anna and Queen Elsa on the bottle. However, things did not go as expected. First the mother and daughter had difficulty getting the product out of the bott...

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Monkeys are to be employed as parental guidance officers in India!

Funny story: Monkeys are to be employed as parental guidance officers in India!

The Indian government have decided to introduce new legislation pertaining to bringing up children by employing monkeys in nurseries, nationwide. After discovering a young girl who was raised by primates in the Uttar Pradesh jungle, a la Mowgli wi...

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Government Plan to Give Child Benefit to Actual Children

Funny story: Government Plan to Give Child Benefit to Actual Children

Amidst a raging debate on the benefits of not having child benefits when you are too rich to give a toss either way, leaves a devastating effect on many families on high and low income. In the wake of austere cuts to reduce the National deficit c...

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Jihadi John "would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids"

RAQQA, SYRIA - "Who'd have thought?" Jihadi John muttered to himself "that it'd end up like this." In the end it hadn't been a drone that had brought the man known only as Jihadi John, from West London but joined the so-called Islamic State in 2012,...

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"This song is gay" concludes celebrated music critic

Funny story: "This song is gay" concludes celebrated music critic

A celebrated music critic has delivered a scathing verdict on the new album by Catfish and the Bottlemen today, taking the band and the internet by storm. After listening to the first 30 seconds of the song and proceeding to take approximately 0.

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Researchers Reveal People Love Their Dogs More Than Their Children

Funny story: Researchers Reveal People Love Their Dogs More Than Their Children

A team of researchers at Michigan state university have evidence that confirms what many have long suspected: People love their dogs more than their kids. The research team led by Dr. April Mgonke took real time scans of subjects brains and looked at specific areas of the brain that became active when subjects were asked either about their pets or their children. "We saw that areas in the...

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Woman Spotted With 'Baby' Doll

Funny story: Woman Spotted With 'Baby' Doll

Diners at a Bangkok food centre were left agape on Sunday, when a woman carrying a doll started acting as if the toy was a real baby. The woman, aged around 75 years old, was accompanied by several other younger women - possibly her middle-aged da...

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Court Trial: Child found guilty of eating chocolate biscuits before tea

Funny story: Court Trial: Child found guilty of eating chocolate biscuits before tea

7 year old Johnny Parker has been found guilty of eating all the chocolate cookies before his tea at Nottingham Crown Court. The jury returned a unanimous verdict over the offensive confectionery consumption in Long Eaton on Friday, July 3. Par...

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Four Girls Injured After Mob Attack At Local Mall

Funny story: Four Girls Injured After Mob Attack At Local Mall

We have also this week, to publish, with feelings of regret and sympathy, the portraits of four young women who were among the victims of mob fury at a Fort Lauderdale Shopping Mall on a fatal Sunday afternoon. All from the Fort Lauderdale area,...

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Kids Company, BBC's a crowd! Ow's about that then?!

Over-hyped charity and equal equalities mad charity Kids Deserve It! was today embroiled in a see it a mile-off scandal that, after seeing it's Chief Exec, Manmilla DahdahdahdahdahdahdahdahBatmaaaan, ousted in an 'apparent' financial related issue a...

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Police have tazered kids, but it's an act of kindness

British Police have multi - tazered University Students, now it appears they have tazered kids, teenagers of 14. 'It's really just to give them a light reprimand, as opposed to being shot dead', says DCI Jonny Tennyson 'We are issued with bulle...

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Pope offers new guidelines for flock's bedroom behavior

Funny story: Pope offers new guidelines for flock's bedroom behavior

Once again, Pope Francis is trying to manage the intimate details of the lives of his flock. Previously, in a mixed metaphor, the pontiff raised eyebrows by suggesting that the faithful, who are made in God's image, are "not rabbits" and should no...

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Blows To The Head Make 9-Year-Old A Man

Funny story: Blows To The Head Make 9-Year-Old A Man

The NFL runs "Moms Clinics" through an operation called "USA Football." It targets moms who determine which sport their kids will play. It is an effort to show that children's football is safe. But kid football isn't safe. As background, Pop Warn...

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It's just Wronga - Pocketmoney Loan Co. opens in Glasgow School!

Funny story: It's just Wronga - Pocketmoney Loan Co. opens in Glasgow School!

Government big-wigs may be forced to act if notorious Payday lenders continue their expansion into the children's pocketmoney market. Payday loan sharks Wronga ! see Easterend Primary School in Glasgow as the ideal trial point in the UK for their con...

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Santa celebrates 10 years of Halloween tradition

Funny story: Santa celebrates 10 years of Halloween tradition

NORTH POLE - For the tenth consecutive year, Santa Claus gave out coal and candy canes to trick-or-treaters. Hordes of children and their parents traveled to the North Pole to meet the jolly old man, who happily welcomed each visitor by name.

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Assault Weapons Chief Says God Is On His Side

Funny story: Assault Weapons Chief Says God Is On His Side

Commenting on the accidental murder of a nine-year-old girl's assault weapons instructor on a gun range, because of her inability to control her Uzi submachine gun, and thus blowing part of his brains out, Wayne La Pisse of the "Owning Guns Is A God-...

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