Brisbane, Australia. In news breaking, tearing and generally wreaking havoc, Australian Prime Minister Julia (the perfumed shark) Gillard has declared martial law on the whole nation, following a near fatal decapitation of the PM by a deliberately th...
Wayne Swan, Australia's cleverest dyslexic Treasurer, has re-opened the debate about the country becoming a republic. "When Britain was an empire it had an emperor. When it was a kingdom, it had a king. Now Australia's got Julia Gillard we must becom...
The wife of Australian opposition leader Tony Abbott has come out in defence of her husband who was labelled a misogynist by Prime Minister Julia Gillard in a forthright speech on Thursday.
Kylie Abbott said that she was "spitting blood" after hea...
When thinking of Tony Abbott the usual 'mad monk' stereotype that the media often spruiks does come to mind. However in 2012 I'm pretty sure Tony is gonna go join the circus to learn the graceful art of lion-taming.
I reckon it'd be a weekend thing in between parliamentary sitting days. Gotta get Tony into the well pressed suit and top-hat and into the ring with Malcolm. Are you with me? Just...
Well dear reader, another year has rolled over us like a Mac Truck driven by a hairy Swedish lesbian! The earth has spun on its axis taking us from horn-bags in bikinis to horn-bags in winter jumpsuits and then back again.
Sitting at the local the other day, I was spit balling with my mates what Christmas at the Lodge would be like. I can picture Julia Gillard sitting in the dining room starin...
Prime Minister David Cameron's poor attempt at an Australian accent has caused outrage Down Under.
Mr Cameron attempted to imitate Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard during a speech at the Lord Mayor'a banquet in London.
He told guests tha...
Australian federal politicians have woken up to the surprise news they are going to get 500% pay rises.Speaking in Canberra, Prime Minister with the world's worst Aussie accent, Julia Gillard made this speech.
G'day all 'n' sundry. This has come as a compleeeete shock to us all. The Indeeeependent Pay Tribunal, chaired by me brother-in-law Josh Bigballs, has decided all us polies need a bit of...
Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard has lodged a patent on her nod with the Australian Patents Office.
Well known for her compulsive nodding, even when saying "No", Ms Gillard decided her nodding action can be commercialised. "There's a huge m...
The Australian Federal Government is asking everyone to pretend it's going to be OK to send asylum seekers who land illegally in Australia to Malaysia for processing.
Australian Immigration Minister Chris Bowen said today: "Look, we know everyone...
Breasts and Speeches
By Les Peter Patterson Jnr
It's appropriate that Julia Gillard's speech tonight at the Gough Whitlam Inaugural oration would be happening straight after the New South Wales Election.
The Labor Party are without a political narrative at both the state and federal level. Fair Dinkum was just watching it on ABC News 24 and I have to say Julia's breasts have more to say tha...
Kevin Rudd, the new Australian opposition leader, refused to meet with the Dalai Lama despite launching a scathing attack on Foreign Minister Downer for once doing the same.
Sorry, you can't go back any further!
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An original metaphor:
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