A deaf drug addict who strangled five people got away with ten ears.
Al Avago was notorious for strangling his victims with the wire cords from their own ear-phones. In his defence, Avago claimed that as he was trying to get the ear-phones out o...
I remember Stinky a tall cadaverous looking chap with a profound limp in his vocabulary.
We bedded at Cambridge together,he had a habit of wanking under a copy of Country life.
Never saw him after Girton College, just sort of went our separate ways, at Winchester together you know.
Some years later, I am sitting in the Dunlop Club having a snifter when who should walk in?
Dear old Stinky, dr...
In an unprecedented legal quandary this week, an entire jury was deemed unfit for service and thrown out by the judge. Journalists discarded all courteous behaviour as they shoved, elbowed and kicked their way to the Court entrance in a bid to interv...
A man who was convicted of a brutal murder twenty-five years ago was released today and he has vowed to clear his name. Mr John Ripper believes a combination of his surname, his "haunting eyes" and his inability to pronounce his "Hs" had convinced pe...
A man has declined to take part in jury service after sensationally admitting he doesn't hold the British Justice System in high regard. He didn't seem to realise that nobody in the country does and people regularly take jury service purely to be nos...
The Great British justice system has done it again; a man has been spared jail after burgling three houses in five days. Justice Bowers listened to how the "poor lamb" had developed a heroin problem and was merely stealing so he didn't have to work a...
British justice was shown to be the best in the world yesterday when a juror who made the mistake of doing internet research about the case she was trying was jailed for six months.
Three judges at the High Court found 34-year-old psychology lectu...
In a landmark case a judge in London has condemned a toddler, to five years hard labour for mouthing the words 'mummy riot, mummy riot' and shaking his rattle at the same time, whilst taken for a stroll by his nanny in London's wealthy enclave of No...
The perennially popular idiom "Sober as a Judge" was put under the spotlight by the Idiom Police, a lesser known division of the Literary Squad in Lincoln.
"A lot of drunk people use the phrase," said Detective Charles Loche. "We need to know how...
The recent spate of super injunction gagging orders are being defied, and several journalists have decided to ignore these bits of paper obtained from injunction-issuing Justice Sue Mai-Ass, who incidentally wears a very strange wig in court and exp...
A man who stole a packet of Munchies from a major UK supermarket chain will spend the rest of his life behind bars.
After a somewhat unnecessary twelve day trial at the Old Bailey, David Francis, 27, was said to have committed "a deliberate and t...
Bolton man, Vernon Birch (not to be confused with the one who played the wah-wah guitar on the late Isaac Hayes' 'Theme From Shaft') was fined £50 today by Bolton magistrates after placing a bunch of cheap supermarket flowers on the town hall steps,...
A new lie detector said to be accurate to within .000001 of a percent has been hailed by many in America as a major breakthrough in crime detection. Retired CIA scientist and inventor Dr. Ralph Seemore who is currently under police protection is said...
Australia: A QUEENSLAND man has described himself as "a bit of a monster" during his trial for assault outside a Melbourne strip club that left the victim critically injured.
Christopher Gibbon, 28, of Brisbane, appeared at Melbourne's Crown Cour...
The Third District Court of Appeals, in Flagstaff Arizona has come under fire for some of its inhumane methods of handing out punishment.
Judge Manherd Prather recently has been sentencing some offenders to what some consider "cruel and inhuman" s...
Judges have been given new guidelines to ensure that they do not offend people who appear before them in court. These came to light during a recent case when a judge referred to a person as a 'gypsy'. The clerk of the court produced a document and ad...
Continuing our undercover investigations into the dark and seemy world of family law, here is another excerpt from the book, the Dummy's guide to being a family court judge, given to all solicitors/barristers and magistrates about to embark on their first sitting in that Alice in Wonderland world of the Family Courts...
Definitions - to make your life a bit easier, we have defined some of the c...
This intrepid under-cover reporter has secretly obtained a copy of the 'Dummy's guide to being a family court judge'.
This is supplied to all solicitors and barristers when they offer to do one day a week as a deputy district judge at their local county court. It is also supplied to the volunteer magistrates before they sit on family cases in the magistrates court.
Excerpts include:
a)...