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Funny satire stories about John Kerry

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Funny story:  Kim Jung-Un Willing To Spare LA For Laker Tickets Next To Jack Nicholson

Kim Jung-Un Willing To Spare LA For Laker Tickets Next To Jack Nicholson

BILLINGSGATE POST - If anyone wonders why Dennis Rodman was granted access to North Korean President Kim Jung-Un, we now know the answer. After making headlines yesterday with his warning that his nuclear missiles are bore-sighted on Los Angeles...
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Funny story:  Secretary of State John Kerry:  C'Mon man! You must be kidding!

Secretary of State John Kerry: C'Mon man! You must be kidding!

Why should Senator John Kerry be appointed Secretary of State? When he made his run for the presidency against Dubya it was pointed out that if Kerry were to be elected president, America would be just one nut away from having a chipmunk (John Edwards) in the White House. While BILLINGSGATE does not wish to offend members of the genera Tamias and Eutamias species, it is not only Dr. B who has not...
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Funny story:  President Obama Diagnosed With Terminal Chicken Lips

President Obama Diagnosed With Terminal Chicken Lips

BILLINGSGATE POST - Being diagnosed as having chicken lips could possibly spell disaster for the incumbent president. As Foghorn Leghorn, who also has chicken lips, so eloquently stated to his friends, Barnyard Dawg and Henery the baby chicken hawk,...
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Funny story:  Obama Plans To Tax Infants To Balance Budget:  Tax On Tots (TOTS)

Obama Plans To Tax Infants To Balance Budget: Tax On Tots (TOTS)

BILLINGSGATE POST: Last night at the Democratic Convention, President Obama unveiled his plan to cut the 16 trillion dollar deficit by doing something no other president has dared: Taxing infants as they leave their mother's womb. Saying that, "...
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Funny story:  John Kerry not sure what he will do with all his money

John Kerry not sure what he will do with all his money

Washington--John Kerry is really rich and not sure what he should do with all his wealth. Should he give it to the poor, find ways to get the economy going by investing it, or find creative ways to shelter his income from the evil IRS? "I joined t...
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Funny story:  Obama Dispatches John Kerry and Jane Fonda to Lay Wreath for Osama; Patch Pakistan Relations!

Obama Dispatches John Kerry and Jane Fonda to Lay Wreath for Osama; Patch Pakistan Relations!

Following an outcry from the government of Pakistan over the stealth incursion into the country resulting in the demise of the World's Most Wanted Terrorist, President Barack Obama announced his intention to "make amends" by dispatching Viet Nam Era...
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Funny story:  Curt Shilling to Dem Senator Who Questioned 2004 "Bloody Sock" Win: I Can Tell You for Sure it Wasn't Ketchup!"

Curt Shilling to Dem Senator Who Questioned 2004 "Bloody Sock" Win: I Can Tell You for Sure it Wasn't Ketchup!"

Boston Red Sox hero Curt Shilling was the victim again of misinformed Democratic politicians as a former US Rhode Island Senator now running for Governor questioned Shillings famous "Bloody Sock" victory in 2004 while slamming RI for granting a loa...
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Funny story:  John Kerry Denied Request for  4th  Purple Heart after  Wounds Surrounding Tax Battle Over  his $7m Yacht Turns Out to be Ketchup!

John Kerry Denied Request for 4th Purple Heart after Wounds Surrounding Tax Battle Over his $7m Yacht Turns Out to be Ketchup!

Massachusetts Senator John "Swiftie" Kerry suffered yet another 'war wound' after it was discovered his $7M yacht, built in Australia, and berthed in Rhode Island, would not be taxed in Massachusetts, his official residence, sparking tax payer outrag...
View 'John Kerry Denied Request for  4th  Purple Heart after  Wounds Surrounding Tax Battle Over  his $7m Yacht Turns Out to be Ketchup!'
Funny story:  Madman in number ten

Madman in number ten

A madman known as Mad Marty Morrison was today sectioned under section 4 of the mental health act. Marty was taken away from outside number ten downing street for causing a disturbance. He was sectioned as an emergency case under section 4 of the...
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Funny story:  Kerry Downsizes!

Kerry Downsizes!

Kerry Katona the former pop star that recently brought Iceland to its kness and ruined it's economy has been forced to downsize. She has moved herself, her mother and umpteen children into a small flat over the "Wun Hung Lo" Cantonese takeaway on...
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Funny story:  Kerry Katona on Ice - Chicago Pimp outbids Colombians for Katona's Services!

Kerry Katona on Ice - Chicago Pimp outbids Colombians for Katona's Services!

Just as the nation of Colombia thought it'd captured the services of Kerry Katona, a distant relative of Barrack Obama, a Pimp Daddy, formally known as "Omar Dimples the Third" has put in a higher counter bid for her services! Omar would only giv...
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Funny story:  Kerry Katona to be new "Nose of Colombia"!

Kerry Katona to be new "Nose of Colombia"!

Former pop star, reality star, shopping star, star Mum, Evening star and Star of Wilmslow, fat bird Kerry Katona has been sensationally revealed as the new "Nose of Colombia"! In a brilliantly timed turn of fortune, Katona has managed to find a lu...
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Funny story:  John Kerry Flip-Flops Again

John Kerry Flip-Flops Again

Pittsburgh, PA (Pittsburgh Gazeete) - Former Presidential candidate John Kerry has flip-flopped once again.
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Funny story:  Andrew Meyer causes U.S. Attorney General nominee, Michael B. Mukasey, to replace all U.S. Attorneys with Blackwater security forces

Andrew Meyer causes U.S. Attorney General nominee, Michael B. Mukasey, to replace all U.S. Attorneys with Blackwater security forces

Washington, D.C. - With Andrew Meyer, a Florida University student, being tasered for asking too many questions about election outcomes at a public Democratic Presidential rally. Movie stars being bleeped on award shows for commenting on the Iraqi wa...
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Funny story:  John Kerry a Casualty of Britney Spears Taser Accident

John Kerry a Casualty of Britney Spears Taser Accident

18 Sep 07, GAINESVILLE, FL, USNA-- Senator and presidential candidate John Fitzgerald Heinz-Kerry, Demon from Taxachusetts, was critically wounded during a University of Florida debate last afternoon, at which Britney Spears, in part-time employment...
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Funny story:  Ron Paul Receives More Political Endorsements

Ron Paul Receives More Political Endorsements

Republican Candidate for the U.S. Presidency Ron Paul received several more endorsements today from various political and non political groups. Paul is running on the Republican ticket and is currently a member of the House of Representatives in his...
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Funny story:  John Kerry Wants French Toast

John Kerry Wants French Toast

John Kerry spoke out on Iraq today, calling for a "French Toast strategic endeavor." Kerry's announcement was in response to the Bush Waffle strategy...
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Funny story:  Invisible Man Identified

Invisible Man Identified

KEGINBUMPORT, MAINE (IP) - News trickling out of this usually quiet waterfront coomunity indicates that the invisible man has been found and identified. He is none other than John Kerry who disappeared after he rolled over and played dead after the...
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Sherlock Actor Investigates Cast

Benedict Cumberbatch drilled the Star Trek cast and successfully deduced that his stolen peanut butter and jelly sandwich was taken by Zachary Quinto.

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