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Funny satire stories about Jimmy Savile

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Funny story: Scary Convicted Celebrity Haunted House Opens in Waxwork Museum

Scary Convicted Celebrity Haunted House Opens in Waxwork Museum

An extremely bad taste haunted walk attraction has opened in Madame Tossard's Chamber of Horrors in London. Having to compete with The London Dungeon and various other scary museums, Mme Tossard's has sexed up its act. Mme Tossard, the C.E.O. tol...
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Funny story: Jimmy Saville Ate My Hamster - Peers Morgan

Jimmy Saville Ate My Hamster - Peers Morgan

General all - purpose monster Jimmy Saville was allegedly so evil that he would regularly eat Peers Morgan's Hamster alive. The famous 1990s red top tabloid headline was thought to be about someone else but it was revealed this morning by sources...
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Funny story: Group of TV presenters arrested after they admit to liking small boys

Group of TV presenters arrested after they admit to liking small boys

A group of TV presenters, who wish to remain nameless due to the nefarious nature of their activities, have admitted that they all like small boys, with each trying to outdo the other in relation to amassing a collection of them. They were all arr...
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Funny story: Dead Paedophile Sir Jim to Spin Discs at Dead Paedophile Concert

Dead Paedophile Sir Jim to Spin Discs at Dead Paedophile Concert

Impressarios have been queuing up to put on a Hi-Tech Hologram Show featuring a posthumous album release by a dead druggie paedophile. The paedophile cannot be named as his family sue the ass off anything that moves. Leading Necro-pervert D.J. S...
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Funny story: Public bored with DJs and C list celebrities being taken to court

Public bored with DJs and C list celebrities being taken to court

Recent Media "overkill" featuring "has been" celebrities going to court has led to cries of "Let's have a 'Strictly' style sudden death televised phone in" to let the public decide if they are to be punished or not. Ideas for what punishments to dish out include: - Forced watching of Soaps with multiple choice tests afterwards for soap haters. - 3 year sentences of football match highligh...
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Funny story: Pensioner de-frocked 500 priests. I am sick of paedophiles, he rants

Pensioner de-frocked 500 priests. I am sick of paedophiles, he rants

Pensioner Pope Benedict XVI de-frocked 500 priests while in office, Vatican sources admitted. Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi initially said the AP report was rubbish. The latest statistics reveal the number of priests defrocked in 2011 and 20...
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Funny story: Royal Pardon for paedo Savile in Brits' 2014 New Year's Honors

Royal Pardon for paedo Savile in Brits' 2014 New Year's Honors

London, UK - Queen Elizabeth is to issue a Royal Pardon in the New Year's Honors List forgiving one of the nation's top sex offenders plus some very lucky mates. The new spirit of reconciliation with excluded minorities means prolific serial perv...
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Funny story: More Pathetic Letters To The Problem Page

More Pathetic Letters To The Problem Page

Dear Sir, I write in the hope that you might sympathise with my plight. For none of mine aquaintance could be expected to proffer aught but brickbats, opprobrium or the cold shoulder. You see, I have somehow acquired the reputation for being a bringer of ill-fortune. "Get away!" they cry. "Why haunteth thou me thus?" If I was a young man, I would have run away to sea long ago. Your...
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Funny story: Savile inquiry spreads to Royal Freak Hospital

Savile inquiry spreads to Royal Freak Hospital

London - Described as the global epicenter of NHS quackery during the Dr Andrew Wakefield MMR scam the Royal Freak has come once again under intensive screwtiny in a police probe into Jimmy Savile stuff. The screwball paedo had a queer fondness fo...
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Funny story: New probe asks if Diana knew 'Jimmy Savile stuff'

New probe asks if Diana knew 'Jimmy Savile stuff'

London - 'Just like Jill Dando?' - A new nail in Princess Di's coffin has appeared with reports that she and Dodi might have been topped after all as many Brits still believe because she knew lots of Jimmy Savile stuff. The carefully choreographed...
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Funny story: Did paedo Savile have his very own Cleveland-style dungeon?

Did paedo Savile have his very own Cleveland-style dungeon?

London - Professional profilers analyzing serial monster Jimmy Savile's depraved 60-year rampage are asking the inevitable, 'just how really bad was this bastard?' A confidential briefing this week will see sleuths from the Met's Serious & Or...
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Funny story: Frankie Howerd on Margaret Thatcher

Frankie Howerd on Margaret Thatcher

Well. Here we are. Here we, ooh, no. Ooh. Ah. Ooh, I don't know where to put meself. Don't know which way to turn tonight. Yes, Missus, you've been there, haven't you? Hmm? You've felt my predicament. Look, now don't start. Shut your mouth. Oh, the riff raff we get in here. But ooh. Ah. No. Don't. Hasn't it been a hard winter? It's been a hard winter. And it's not over yet, I can tell you. Ooh,...
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Funny story: Thatcher died in hotel bed reading Spoof story

Thatcher died in hotel bed reading Spoof story

London - The old despot's last moments have been revealed after CCTV footage was published by the Ritzz Crackers Motel where she was holed up pending another, er, comeback. Mrs T, who died on Monday morning, is pictured with a pint tumbler of gin...
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Funny story: Thatcher's Final Resting Place To Be At Scarborough!

Thatcher's Final Resting Place To Be At Scarborough!

Britain's first female Prime Minister, Baroness Margaret Thatcher has died following a massive stroke early on Monday morning at her London home. It is thought she was not on the Liverpool Care Pathway at the time. A funeral service is to be held...
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Funny story: Popular Children's Entertainer Uncle Jake McRaffles not a Peado after all

Popular Children's Entertainer Uncle Jake McRaffles not a Peado after all

With Operation Yewtree cutting a swathe through the childhood nostalgia of 30 and 40 somethings up and down the land, it may surprise many to learn that creepy 1980s children's entertainer Uncle Jake McRaffles was not a nonce, as many had suspected,...
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Funny story: Savile's missing £20 million traced to satanic coven brats

Savile's missing £20 million traced to satanic coven brats

London - Police have found the dead perv's millions in a Swiss slush fund for brats of satanic hos. Their existence has been a government secret ever since the year dot according to sources at Operation Upper Gumtree. It means that Savile bough...
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Funny story: GET HIM OFF MY TELEVISION!!! - says everyone

GET HIM OFF MY TELEVISION!!! - says everyone

A class action is being filed on behalf of the British Public against BBC, ITV and C4 jointly to redress trauma and distress of seeing 'that b*stard' every time the news is broadcast. Or any BBC retrospective. Keith Foss, spokesman for SOS (Sod Of...
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Funny story: Jimmy Savile was Archbishop Cosmo Lang's little bastard

Jimmy Savile was Archbishop Cosmo Lang's little bastard

London - Government papers released this week show the sordid hatchet-faced cleric spawned a number of disgusting brats including one by the Queen Mother. That offspring became a shoo-in to the Savile family after Sister Mary Bonkers, a low-IQ Ca...
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Ferguson Police to Lay Off 3 Black Officers

Ferguson Police say that their experiment to hire black police officers to stem the violence in the predominantly black city has failed. They will lay off all black officers and not hire any more.

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