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Funny story: Trump: Birther Attack on Jesus

Trump: Birther Attack on Jesus

Donald Trump seems strong in the race for the Republican presidential nomination, but that doesn't mean he'll curb his more fringe tendencies. This week, Trump spoke at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia, where he brought his brash viewpoi...
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Funny story: Ghost of Elvis Witnesses to Young Musician

Ghost of Elvis Witnesses to Young Musician

A stunning apparition that left a twenty year old witness all shook up claimed to be Elvis Presley, with a message from Heaven. Zeke was playing his guitar, in his Memphis garage, when suddenly, lightning struck outside, and an apparition stood be...
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Funny story: Jesus Is A Sellout, Says God

Jesus Is A Sellout, Says God

God, The Almighty, sensationally slammed his own son yesterday, labelling him a 'sellout'. The omnipotent Supreme Being was talking at the 'Save The Church Bell' committee meeting in Farnborough, when he made the shock statement. Asked if Jesus...
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Funny story: The Case Against Jesus...Find of the Century

The Case Against Jesus...Find of the Century

Archaeologists digging near Jerusalem have unearthed what could be the find of the century... a document purporting to list the actual charges made against Jesus Christ. Jesus was formally arraigned at the house of the High Priest Caiaphas before a gathering of Scribes and officials belonging to the Jerusalem Sanhedrin council. The list of indictments was read out to the defendant who made...
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Funny story: Papyrus of Ezekiel's Last Prophecy Discovered

Papyrus of Ezekiel's Last Prophecy Discovered

Last year, archaeologists digging in Iraq near Al Kifi discovered what they claimed was the tomb of the Hebrew Prophet Ezekiel. World media made light of the find because it had always been believed that the great prophet was buried in England at Wes...
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Funny story: Ancient text says Jesus Thought Mary Was a Ball Breaker!

Ancient text says Jesus Thought Mary Was a Ball Breaker!

Professor Karen L.King, in her office at Harvard Divinity School, held a fragment of papyrus that she says contains a reference to Jesus' wife. The ink on the front side contains eight lines, dark enough to be legible. Line 4 purportedly says, "Je...
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Funny story: Ancient Papyrus Text - Jesus Claims his Wife Was a Ballbreaker!

Ancient Papyrus Text - Jesus Claims his Wife Was a Ballbreaker!

Professor Karen L. King, in her office at Harvard Divinity School, held a fragment of papyrus that she says contains a reference to Jesus' wife. The ink on the front side contains eight lines, dark enough to be legible. Line 4 purportedly says, Jesus said to them, 'My wife is a Fucking Ballbreaker". "It's obviously an important find," said Carl R. Holladay, professor of New Testament studie...
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Funny story: God Must be Hispanic If he Named His Only Son Jesus

God Must be Hispanic If he Named His Only Son Jesus

Wow - I just realized that God has to be Hispanic! I mean - otherwise he would have named his only kid God Junior or at least some common name of those times- like Joshua or Peter or Moishe -any thing but Jesus(unless he was Hispanic). What made me think of this was I was watching the Los Angeles marathon last week and at least fifty percent of the people had to be Hispanic -and at least fif...
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Funny story: Pope professes his fondness for Kanye West, declares all other music "obsolete"

Pope professes his fondness for Kanye West, declares all other music "obsolete"

Vatican City- In what is sure to be earth shattering news, earlier today Pope Francis declared his love of Kanye West, calling him "the greatest musical mind of the last 100 years". His holiness commented: "If our Lord and Savior were here with u...
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Funny story: God Speaks to Earth from Heaven

God Speaks to Earth from Heaven

Last night, the whole of Europe was brought to a standstill when, exactly at midnight, a white-haired, bearded figure appeared on every television set on the continent. Crowds poured out of pubs and restaurants, many of them hysterical; public transport came to a halt as millions gathered in city squares and churches. The Pope appealed for calm; but nobody was listening to him. The followi...
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Funny story: Jesus Wants Cage Fighting Of MMA

Jesus Wants Cage Fighting Of MMA

Violence and religion have been one of the primary forces in human history. Now there is a fusion of the two with a new craze for 700 cage-fighting church ministeries across the U.S. "God loves cage fighting," says pastor John Richards of Colu...
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Funny story: Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Jesus wants people for sunbeams again on an interim basis according to a message received by the Archdeacon of Scunthorpe, Dr. Godfrey Gordon Gustavus Gore. The Archdeacon has a private communication system which he accesses by putting his ear to...
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Funny story: Carpentry - Jesus Impressed By Modern Technology

Carpentry - Jesus Impressed By Modern Technology

A man looking uncannily like a medieval representation of Jesus Christ and wearing what was later proved to be a bootleg copy of the Turin Shroud rushed on stage at the Scunthorpe annual carpentry conference yesterday. The man took over control o...
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Funny story: 2,000 Injured In Bradford Stampede As Taxi Driver Shouts "Taxi for Abu"

2,000 Injured In Bradford Stampede As Taxi Driver Shouts "Taxi for Abu"

A "rookie" taxi driver, who pulled up in the centre of Bradford last night at 11.30 and shouted, "Is there an Abu here?" has been suspended after 2,000 Abus were taken to Bradford Hospital A&E unit with crush injuries. First names, tradition...
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Funny story: Ted Cruz Announces: 'Jesus Charlie is me!'--Opposes 'Obamacare for Education'

Ted Cruz Announces: 'Jesus Charlie is me!'--Opposes 'Obamacare for Education'

Washington--Republican firebrand Ted Cruz said today that "like those guys on TV," he too was "Jesus Charlie." He went on to denounce President Obama's recent proposal giving workers two free years of community college as "Obamacare for education."...
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Funny story: Archaeologists Unearth Incredible Jesus Document

Archaeologists Unearth Incredible Jesus Document

An investigation into the execution of Jesus Christ was commissioned by the Jerusalem Council after his death. In a remarkable find, archaeologists digging in Jerusalem have come across an actual transcript of the minutes of that historic council meeting. The following members of the council... Rabbis Joachim, Saul and Jacob present their findings to chairman Moses Ishmael. Moses: So, let...
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Funny story: Jesus - I Don't Want Any More Sunbeams

Jesus - I Don't Want Any More Sunbeams

Jesus has appealed to people not to try to be sunbeams, as he is snowed under with them. "He told our religious affairs journalist, "I don't know who wrote that fucking 'Jesus wants me for a sunbeam' song but since the financial crashes I've a millio...
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Funny story: Archaeologists Find Letter from Pontius Pilate

Archaeologists Find Letter from Pontius Pilate

Archaeologists excavating along the North West coast of Palestine close to where Pontius Pilate had his palace have made a remarkable find. It is a letter written on papyrus. Experts are not sure if it is a copy or not. Was it ever sent? Did Tiberius Caesar read it and respond? If not, we could well be living now in a very different world indeed. Because what they unearthed is a letter from Po...
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Trump has no need of prayer . . .

. . . says he can talk to himself anytime he wants to.
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