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Funny story: Trump Blows Off Jeb Bush Popcorn Farts As Huge Distraction

Trump Blows Off Jeb Bush Popcorn Farts As Huge Distraction

BILLINGSGATE POST: In an exclusive interview with Barbara Walters, Donald Trump tastefully explained that the reason he wants Jeb Bush to move to the far end of the line has nothing to do with his feeble ratings; it is because Bush is constantly squ...
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Funny story: Jeb Bush Outs Donald Trump As A Democrat Secret Agent

Jeb Bush Outs Donald Trump As A Democrat Secret Agent

LAS VEGAS, NV - Donald Trump was outed today by Jeb Bush as a secret double-agent, sent by Democrats to destroy the Republican party. Former Florida governor, Jeb Bush, made the announcement today via Twitter: "Donald negotiated a deal with Hil...
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Funny story: Who's Afraid Of Donald Trump?

Who's Afraid Of Donald Trump?

Who's afraid of Donald Trump? Seems like most of the folks in the Republican party. He recently was overheard to have said that Osama bin Laden was still alive and that he spoke to him. Not dead! But Seal Team 6 finished him off and there was a...
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Funny story: Donald Trump's Alter Ego Announces his Candidacy

Donald Trump's Alter Ego Announces his Candidacy

NEW YORK--Ronald Chump, the alter ego of media-hog Donald Trump, today announced his candidacy for president, saying that he was running for president because all of the other candidates were "low energy" and "losers" and incapable of "making Americ...
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Funny story: Clinton Slams Bush: 'Warmongering, Cynical Establishment Career Politician!'

Clinton Slams Bush: 'Warmongering, Cynical Establishment Career Politician!'

The Dynasty Wars are heating up. Never mind Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Clinton vs Bush is where it's at! Or at least, it's where the money's at, anyways! See the transcript of Clinton's latest semi-public post on the notable TOR website known as Dark Internet Policy Forum: Jeb Bush? Look, I strongly believe in America and in meritocracy. OK? I just can't accept that in America, of all...
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Funny story: John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (2/2)

John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (2/2)

How have people received John Kerry's recent nuclear annhilation of The Onion? We'll start off with Hillary Clinton. Now listen here, young man. With all due respect, reporter… which ain't very much, let's be… Ah, HONEST… Erm… Well anyway, why so fastidious? Huh? I mean, you know, maybe Iran are, say, just a few decades ahead of schedule in developing nukes and this is the first...
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Funny story: Trump To Name Dr. Ben Carson As Personal Brain Surgeon: Carly As Hat Check Girl

Trump To Name Dr. Ben Carson As Personal Brain Surgeon: Carly As Hat Check Girl

BILLINGSGATE POST: Confident that he will win the Republican nomination and be elected president, Donald Trump revealed that he has already contacted Dr. Ben Carson and Carly Fiorina about joining his cabinet. Trump said that he was so impressed...
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Funny story: Donald Trump: "I Hate All People Equally"

Donald Trump: "I Hate All People Equally"

Donald Trump today managed to offend all remaining members of the population in a broad far reaching speech with virtually no redeeming qualities. "I hate you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you....(heavy breathing)and...
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Funny story: Jeb Bush Calls for Mandatory Work Hours Increase

Jeb Bush Calls for Mandatory Work Hours Increase

Not only does Presidential Candidate Jeb Bush say that Americans need to work more hours in order to grow the struggling American economy, he also feels that they should be forced to work these extended hours. The Republican hopeful laid out his pla...
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Funny story: Jeb Bush Stakes Out Middle Ground On Gay Marriage

Jeb Bush Stakes Out Middle Ground On Gay Marriage

Tampa, Florida - With his eye towards a centrist electorate in a general election race between himself and Democratic Presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton, Jeb Bush today said that "the Supreme Court's word is not final and the gay marriage debate w...
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Funny story: The News (Really) Bytes - June 2015

The News (Really) Bytes - June 2015

A round-up of the news from online and social media - June 2015 Jeb Bush announces candidacy for President - The head political office of the U.S. is now going back to the Bush Leagues. Rachel Dolezal, a white person, pretended to be black and became head of the Spokane Washington NAACP and now has stepped down making true the statement "Once you go black you hate to go back". Hurricane B...
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Funny story: Bush & Brother In Secret Death Cult

Bush & Brother In Secret Death Cult

After exhaustive research I have discovered that many prominent American politicians, leaders, and officials belong to a secret society called "Keres." In ancient Greece, violent death was the domain of Thanatos (god of death) and the blood-craving s...
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Funny story: Jeb! _______ of the ______ Dynasty Announces His Bid for President

Jeb! _______ of the ______ Dynasty Announces His Bid for President

MIAMI, FL-John Ellis "Jeb" _______, brother of George W. ______, son of George H. W. ______, and the grandson of Senator Prescott S. ________, today announced that he would run for president of the United States because, he boomed, "I'm running becau...
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Funny story: Jeb Bush also mispronounces nuclear

Jeb Bush also mispronounces nuclear

Just outside room 219, a large composed group of media personnel appeared to question Nurse Draw. She confirmed that Jeb Bush, had authorized his medical records be opened to the public. The previous night, asked if he mispronounced the word "nucl...
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Funny story: Jeb denies he is related to any other Bush

Jeb denies he is related to any other Bush

Today, Jeb Bush threw his hat into the ring and someone threw it back at him. "You," the man in his twenties wearing boots, jeans, and snuggling underwear, said, "look better in it than I do." Jeb looked at him, smiled, and said, "You're right,...
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Funny story: Jeb Bush Stakes Out Middle Ground On Immigration - Favors Driver's Licenses For Immigrants With Limitiations

Jeb Bush Stakes Out Middle Ground On Immigration - Favors Driver's Licenses For Immigrants With Limitiations

Des Moines, Iowa - In response to Hillary Clinton's recent move left on immigration, seen in her promise to take executive action if elected President to grant citizenship to illegals currently in the nation, Jeb Bush yesterday staked out a position...
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Funny story: Ronald McDonald announces intent to run for President

Ronald McDonald announces intent to run for President

Adding to the growing list of franchise names running for President, Ronald McDonald announced his campaign for the highest office in the land. When asked why he would make such a move, the clown responded, "I figured with the other candidates tha...
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Funny story: Four GOP Presidential Hopefuls Drown While Testing the Waters for 2016

Four GOP Presidential Hopefuls Drown While Testing the Waters for 2016

Across the nation, four GOP presidential hopefuls drowned this week while testing the waters for the 2016 presidential run. Mitt Romney, according to nearby witnesses, drowned outside his residence in San Diego, CA, while taking a morning dip in t...
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