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Funny story:  Health Alert, "Lawyerish Settlementitus", Infects People Across America.

Health Alert, "Lawyerish Settlementitus", Infects People Across America.

A new malady has been sweeping across America. It seems that when ever someone in America is involved in any kind of accident, they develop a wide range of health problems. The American Health Society became aware of this rash of complaints when o...
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Funny story:  New brain: "I'm living the dream," says Louis

New brain: "I'm living the dream," says Louis

Looking tired but relaxed, Louis Walsh emerged this afternoon from Beaumont Hospital with neurosurgeon Willie Bodgem at his side. Louis waved enthusiastically to no-one in particular as a Private Eye reporter waited, hungry for the first utterance fr...
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Funny story:  Brain implant for Louis Walsh

Brain implant for Louis Walsh

A spokesperson from Beaumont Hospital in Dublin confirmed that a small brain implant was successfully performed on X Factor judge Louis Walsh yesterday. The latest information from the hospital suggests that Walsh is recovering well after surgery.
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Funny story:  Man gets out of bed the wrong way

Man gets out of bed the wrong way

A Goole man with a broken nose was admitted to Humberside Hospital yesterday morning after getting out of bed the wrong way. Errol Dover, 58, who usually sleeps like a log, bashed his nose against the wall shortly after his alarm went off. "It...
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Funny story:  Rolf's Christmas Animal Hospital Jamboree

Rolf's Christmas Animal Hospital Jamboree

The following is a transcript of a TV show which will be broadcast on BBC5 on Christmas Day, 2012. Rolf Harris: G'day, and welcome to Rolf's Christmas Animal Hospital Jamboree! We're back at St Halibut's Veterinarian Hospital, spreading Christmas cheer to some poor little critters who are sad at having to spend the festive season all crook in bed. We've got lots of special presents and Chris...
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Funny story:  Jessica Simpson's Got Another Baby Bump!

Jessica Simpson's Got Another Baby Bump!

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Jessica Simpson gave birth to a baby boy on May 1, and seven months later she is pregnant again. Simpson, 32, says that she is literally shocked that one of her eggs got fertilized so quickly. She commented that it is somewhat bi...
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Funny story:  Dancing With The Stars: Kelly Monaco and Val Chmerkovskiy Deny The Baby Bump Rumors

Dancing With The Stars: Kelly Monaco and Val Chmerkovskiy Deny The Baby Bump Rumors

HOLLYWOOD - During the 14 seasons that Dancing With The Stars has been on the air there has never been a dance couple who have become closer than Val Chmerkovskiy and Kelly Monaco. The very petite Kelly, who was named after the color; Kelly Green,...
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Funny story:  Holby City To Blame For New Disease

Holby City To Blame For New Disease

Scientists and hospital staff are baffled this evening as Hugo Mountbatten, 41 from Wigan, continues to talk in overly complex medical jargon after prolonged contact with the BBC medical drama series 'Holby City'. The bar owner, from the Pemberton...
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Funny story:  British tourist arrested for theft of penis pump from Dallas sex shop

British tourist arrested for theft of penis pump from Dallas sex shop

DALLAS, TEXAS (ABSNN) - The masked, knife wielding robber who stole $500 in cash and a $150 penis pump from a Dallas adult video store today was apprehended only four hours later at Parkland Memorial Hospital according to the DPD. "We got a ph...
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Funny story:  Duke of Edinburgh Warned Carpentry May Be Necessary!

Duke of Edinburgh Warned Carpentry May Be Necessary!

The Duke of Edinburgh has been advised to rest so will have no visitors today after spending 'an uncomfortable night' in his hospital bed. The 91 year old Duke was taken to Aberdeen's Royal Infirmary on Wednesday after his head became trapped betw...
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Funny story:  Inside the hospital of the future

Inside the hospital of the future

British hospitals are currently facing significant cuts and changes to the way they operate. However one hospital has managed the amazing feat of massively cutting costs while still exceeding government targets. I took a tour of Dorking's Idi Amin Hospital where the motto is "doctoring is in our blood". Instead of expensive human nurses tending to patients' needs, they have robot matrons on all...
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Funny story:  Lady Gaga Extremely Depressed That Her New Reality Show "Okay, So What Does My Dress Smell Like" Has Been Cancelled

Lady Gaga Extremely Depressed That Her New Reality Show "Okay, So What Does My Dress Smell Like" Has Been Cancelled

LOS ANGELES - Lady Gaga and her hair stylist FuFi Fondue had just finished having dinner at The Gunfight At The OK Corral Steakhouse when she was approached by Tahiti Zeppelin, a reporter with Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres. Miss Zeppelin asked the sing...
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Funny story:  Rihanna Desperate For Money Puts Her Caribbean Island, St. Songstress, On The Market For $8.3 Million

Rihanna Desperate For Money Puts Her Caribbean Island, St. Songstress, On The Market For $8.3 Million

BROOKLYN - Rihanna was in Brooklyn visiting her cousin Agrafina Fannyfitz, 22, who had just had a baby girl. The baby named Rapunzelina Fannyfitz is being regarded as one of the biggest babies to ever be born in Brooklyn. Dr. Offenhauser F. Qui...
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Funny story:  Smart as a Fox, part III

Smart as a Fox, part III

Exhausted, I drove my girlfriend to a university hospital, believing such institutes would admit voluntary patients as sort of guinea pigs for training purposes. I was wrong. The number of volunteers, because of high medical expenses, is so high that they have no room for so many patients. They are no longer free; they admit patients just like any private hospital, irrespective of public funds al...
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Funny story:  Shylock Humes: and the case of the missing watch. Part One.

Shylock Humes: and the case of the missing watch. Part One.

Shylock Humes lay on the bed. The Briar burned slowly filling the room with the sweat aroma of brandy soaked tobacco. Silence engulfed him as his heavy eyelids began to close. "No smokin in ere mate" whispered a voice. "Oh, sorry" answered a startled Shylock. "Surgeons don't like it when they are operating" said a nurse. "What the hell is going here then"! Sir Spittle Spungion the surg...
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Funny story:  Jessica Simpson Finally Has Her Baby - And It's A Big One!

Jessica Simpson Finally Has Her Baby - And It's A Big One!

LOS ANGELES - Well it appears that Jessica Simpson may have broken the record for being pregnant for the longest time. She finally 'popped' out her little baby which is actually one heck of a whopper at 9 pounds 13 ounces on May 1, 2012. One of...
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Funny story:  Dolly Parton Injures Herself Filming a Pogo Stick Commercial

Dolly Parton Injures Herself Filming a Pogo Stick Commercial

LOS ANGELES - Dolly Parton, the Queen of Country Music, was recently rushed to Our Lady of The Silver Screen Hospital in Los Angeles. According to Pia Confetti of the El Lay Informer Ms. Parton was in the process of filming a pogo stick commercial...
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Funny story:  A look at: This week St Barnandbus Hospital

A look at: This week St Barnandbus Hospital

Our drama unfolds in the operating theatre of St Barnandbus hospital Epsom. The surgeons are half way through removing Mrs Grongles glasses when the anaesthetist asks how long they will take. "How dare you Mild" Said Sir Bitter. "This woman deserves our very best attention!" "Yes Sir!" shouted the Porter. "What" asked Sir Bitter. "Sorry sir, I was watching the monitor" answered What.
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Iron Manifold

SAN DIEGO, CA--Five years after hearing it for the first time, Danny Orsi still has no idea that the
Black Sabbath song "Iron Man" wasn't written for the film series.

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