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Funny story: False Legged Horse Romps In At 2000 - 1 Betting Suspended

False Legged Horse Romps In At 2000 - 1 Betting Suspended

A formerly injured horse, Pastorius II romped home by 13 lengths at Chepslow this afternoon. Six months ago, the horse was about to be shot after it jumped over a grass cutting machine, losing four legs below the "knee". A relative of Oscar Pistoli...
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Funny story: New Royal Race Meetings To Feature Only Smack-Head Horses

New Royal Race Meetings To Feature Only Smack-Head Horses

Rally style jockey protection cages are among the proposals for "Horse Smack-Head" meetings to be staged in Afhghanistan. The unfortunate horses which are prone to accidental banned substance ingestion will race while on morphine initially, before b...
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Funny story: One's Horses Achieve An All Time High

One's Horses Achieve An All Time High

Despite Estimate, one of HRH Queen Elizabeth's horses accidentally getting contaminated food in its nosh bag, this year has seen many high points for the Queen's horses, the Palace said this morning. "Some of the horses that her nags mix with though,...
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Funny story: Toast Of New York burns his Epson Derby bridges, heads for Belmont Invitational instead

Toast Of New York burns his Epson Derby bridges, heads for Belmont Invitational instead

New York - A Brti-trained wonder horse named after its eponymous Upper East Side breakfast bar owners is homeward bound for a tilt at this year's $1.25m Belmont Derby Invitational. Toast of New York is now a firm 3/1 favorite for the 5 July 10-fur...
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Funny story: Colleges Could Replace Football Teams With Race Horses

Colleges Could Replace Football Teams With Race Horses

For the first time in the history of college sports, athletes are asking to be represented by a labor union, taking formal steps on Tuesday to begin the process of being recognized as employees. Ramogi Huma, president of the National College Playe...
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Funny story: Qatari shaikh falls for $8 million talking horse

Qatari shaikh falls for $8 million talking horse

Doha, Qatar - Not since Dubai ruler Shaikh Mohammed McTomb-Raider's disastrous $10 million punt on Snaafi Dancer in 1982 has the world of thoroughbred bloodstock sales looked so damn pleased with itself. The totally useless unraced son of the lege...
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Funny story: Breeders Cup next as Kingsbarns an absolute 6/1 steal for Irish Champion Stakes

Breeders Cup next as Kingsbarns an absolute 6/1 steal for Irish Champion Stakes

Kentucky - A huge American punt on Kingsbarns winning Saturday's Irish Champion Stakes has been reported by online spread-betting site Aintgottaprayer.con as several million dollars of US bloodstock agents' and thoroughbred breeders' hard earned cash...
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Funny story: LeBron James Wants To Buy The Fantastic Racehorse Palace Malice

LeBron James Wants To Buy The Fantastic Racehorse Palace Malice

MIAMI - LeBron James has said that he wants to get in contact with the owners of Palace Malice about purchasing the champion thoroughbred racehorse. James the star of the world champion NBA Miami Heat remarked that he recently traveled down to Coz...
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Funny story: Palace Malice Leaves Every Horse In The Dust As He Wins The Yucatan Commemorative Derby

Palace Malice Leaves Every Horse In The Dust As He Wins The Yucatan Commemorative Derby

COZUMEL, Mexico - Kentucky racehorse Palace Malice has just become the first horse in Mexico to ever win the nation's Triple Crown of Horseracing as he handily won The Yucatan Commemorative Derby. Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Gazette covered...
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Funny story: Palace Malice Races To A Record-Breaking Victory In The Tijuana Invitational Derby

Palace Malice Races To A Record-Breaking Victory In The Tijuana Invitational Derby

TIJUANA, Mexico - The winner of The Belmont Stakes Palace Malice has made history down in sunny old Mexico. The Kentucky racehorse easily won the coveted Tijuana Invitational Derby by a record-shattering 27 lengths. Jockey Mike Smith said he kn...
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Funny story: GG Surprise for Hapless Punters

GG Surprise for Hapless Punters

The GG races at Royle Ashcart have surprised punters who expected exciting races. Unfortunately GG8 proved disappointing with Dick Branson on Virgin Ridiculous winning by a short head. Bermuda Shorts was left far behind and the favourites Jersey B...
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Funny story: Palace Malice Wins The Belmont Stakes And Now Sets His Sites on Mexico's Tijuana Invitational Derby

Palace Malice Wins The Belmont Stakes And Now Sets His Sites on Mexico's Tijuana Invitational Derby

ELMONT, New York - Palace Malice defeated the Kentucky Derby winner Orb and the Preakness winner Ox Bow to capture the third jewel of horse racing's coveted Triple Crown, The Belmont Stakes. Jockey Mike Smith said that he knew since the night befo...
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Funny story: Kim Jong Un's Race Horse Will Not Be Allowed To Run In The Belmont Stakes

Kim Jong Un's Race Horse Will Not Be Allowed To Run In The Belmont Stakes

ELMONT, New York - The United States Racehorse Federation has just announced that North Korean leader Kim Jong Un's racehorse Northern Rice King will not be allowed to run in the 145th running of The Belmont Stakes. USRF spokesperson Amethyst Chut...
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Funny story: Kentucky Derby Winner Orb May Not Run In The Preakness

Kentucky Derby Winner Orb May Not Run In The Preakness

BALTIMORE - Word coming out of the home of The Preakness is that Kentucky Derby winner, Orb may not be entered to race in the second jewel of the Triple Crown race. Orb's owner Stuart "Horsey" Janney said that he was told by Orb's nutritionist ide...
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Funny story: I'll Have Another won't run Belmont; He Has The "Zombie Virus". Has Been Destroyed.

I'll Have Another won't run Belmont; He Has The "Zombie Virus". Has Been Destroyed.

The racehorse I'll Have Another has been scratched from Saturday's Belmont Stakes, ending its bid to become the first Triple Crown winner in 34 years, as he has contracted the dreaded zombie virus. The beast is reportedly foaming at the mouth, has...
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Funny story: Horse Wins Race

Horse Wins Race

The 137th Preakness Stakes was run today, and for the 137th consecutive time the race was won by a small man riding a horse. I'll Have Another kept alive its hopes for a triple crown, or rather, kept alive the triple crown hopes of the people around...
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Funny story: Camilla top suspect in satanic horse slayings spate

Camilla top suspect in satanic horse slayings spate

Cornwall - Local scrimshaw foragers said today a decapitated horse's head on a Cornwall beach had three Prince of Wales albatross feathers stuck in its snout. It was found washed up on Pentegwam Bay just weeks after a mutilated pregnant mare's co...
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Funny story: Wayne Rooney named new horse after Pippa Middleton 'before realising it was a colt not a filly'

Wayne Rooney named new horse after Pippa Middleton 'before realising it was a colt not a filly'

Manchester - "Saw its backside, like, and had to call it Pippy," was the lame explanation ahead of the two year-old's debut at Chester racecourse on Wednesday. The Australian Exceed And Excel-sired colt out of US mare Night Shift was snapped up by...
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Showing page 1 (of 7 pages)
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Bill Clinton: U. S. can't win ground war vs. Iraq

Bill Clinton insists the U. S. armed forces cannot win a land war against Iraq "or any other country, no matter how many booties are on the ground, because there are too many gays in the military."

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