That didn't take long. No sooner had Bo'sun Higgs pulled in with the rest of the fleet did he find himself having too good a time with a couple of girls owning five names between the both of them and knocking back the electric alcohol that has power...
The super-fast camera can show a bullet-shaped pulse of light travelling from one end of a laboratory flask to another in a fraction of a second. That might make interesting fodder for Boob-Tube videos,but now they are putting that very same super-fa...
Physicists recently made headlines by announcing their discovery of the Higgs boson-the long sought-after, so-called "God Particle." The God Particle would explain pretty much everything in the universe. Or so the media report. According to reputable...
Scientists at CERN today announced that they had discovered the Satan particle, which has the same mass and spin as the God particle, but opposite charge. When a God particle and a Satan particle collide, the two annihilate each other and energy is r...
A gigantic Higgs Boson has been discovered during a session of relief caused by too many curries and chips bought at a local Indian take-away (not a racist comment BTW).
The explosion took place on an outside bog (better known as a crap-hole) in N...
Bern, Switzerland-- Excited physicists at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) have finally discovered the elusive Higgs Boson. The sub-atomic particle has been the object of an intense search by scientists for over thirty years. Tears of joy at its dis...
A particle of the late, great Charlie Higgs-boson has reportedly been found in the large Hadrians Wall collider outside the Dignitas Clinic in Switzerland.
It is thought this could be the crucial particle in finding out the origins of derivative...
Cern scientists revealing results from the Large Hadron Collider have claimed the discovery of a new particle consistent with the Higgs boson.
Boffins have been searching for 45 years for the particle which they believe will explain how matter at...
The Higgs boson, the particle that has cost untold billions of dollars to detect, has potentially been discovered, just as the Cern scientists said it would be earlier in the year.
The Hadron collider is due to be shut down at the end of the year...
The world is coming to terms with the discovery that everything we have ever known is only a simulation in some tremendous computer system. To be honest, I am not even sure why I am writing this article or even if it is me writing this article.
Ph...
Interpol Headquarters, Lyon -SERN officials have announced a "joint partnership," Involving Scotland Yard and the International Criminal Police Organization as the largest particle hunt in history goes into full gear to capture the elusive Higgs Boso...
An elite team of Oxford and Cambridge scientists has come to a surprising conclusion about why the nation was grabbed by hysteria over the past few days: a combination of the transit of Venus and operations at CERN released a large number of the so-c...
The world of science is in uproar over revelations of gambling among high level physicists. I discovered the scale of the problem by talking to one of the victims.
Quantum mechanic Floyd Gluon* put down his tiny monkey wrench and ushered me into his office for a secret interview.
He revealed to me that what started as an experiment soon turned into an ugly habit.
"Some of us guys got tog...
Crew members aboard the Frigate HMS Rigging have returned to Southampton after six months patrolling the seas around Afghanistan to much confusion.
"We've pulled into port this week," said quartermaster Lou Tennant, "and we're told the entire worl...
CERN Scientists are red-faced today when it was revealed that the bumps in the data of the two colliders that were thought to be the Higgs Boson turned out to be somebody dropping a cup of coffee in the analysis lab above the particle accelerator.
A spate of head explosions hit news organisations yesterday in the wake of the press conference held by boffins at the Cern laboratory.
Physicists Fabiola Gianotti and Guido Tonelli presented experiment results which scientists reckon provide evid...
SWITZERLAND - The giant underground dangerous machine that may turn the earth into a black hole has given mankind some dividend, finally. After spending trillions of bailout money on the project, there is finally a use for the spin-off technology.
The elusive Higgs Boson - the theorised particle which inspired a 10 billion pound hole in the ground has been found. Well so the BBC would have you believe.
The BBC, famed for producing misleading 'factual' programming claims to have photographed...