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Funny satire stories about Hell

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Funny story: Dead people joining protest movements and voter lines

Dead people joining protest movements and voter lines

New studies indicate large numbers of dead people are lining up to vote across the country in advance of November 8. Nigel J. Provender, president of CWS (Cadavers With Soul), is in one of these lines. He reveals that Mr. Trump's claim dead peo...
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Funny story: Hell to be renamed Hell-upon-Thames

Hell to be renamed Hell-upon-Thames

HELL-UPON-THAMES - Following in the footsteps of Staines, which recently re-named itself Staines-upon-Thames, Satan has declared that he will re-name Hell Hell-upon-Thames, as part of a £60 million publicity campaign to increase tourism to the region...
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Funny story: Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

In a shock statement, the tenth circle of hell from Dante's "Inferno" has been named as the Northern Line at rush hour. Intended as the circle to punish commuters for trusting the British public transportation system, this horrendous site sees an...
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Funny story: Medium Reveals All Of Hell Is A No Smoking Zone

Medium Reveals All Of Hell Is A No Smoking Zone

If you think you might go to Satan's fiery place instead of Heaven when you die, you better light up your cigarette now because all of Hell is a no smoking zone. Mysterious medium Maria Duval said she was in contact with the spirit of famed Roger Vivier, an enthusiastic smoker who designed many of the popular stiletto heel styles of the 1950s. In a letter on her blog, Duval told her fans a...
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Funny story: Ole Blue Eyes is Back. Sinatra Seen in Las Vegas.

Ole Blue Eyes is Back. Sinatra Seen in Las Vegas.

A janitor at the famous Caesar's Palace Las Vegas claimed he not only saw Frank Sinatra the famous singer in a dressing room he was cleaning but had a long conversation with his ghost. A reporter from Follywood Fortnightly, LA's most prestigious variety magazine was invited to meet with the janitor. The janitor took the reporter to Frank's old dressing room and shouted; "Frank!" Out of an...
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Funny story: Post-Mortem Skype Reveals Hellish Secret

Post-Mortem Skype Reveals Hellish Secret

In a new program launched by the Theo-Science Department of Adam Everson University (Normal, IL), researchers were able to create a method of very tangibly speaking to those who have passed away. Done through a method derived of advanced electronic...
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Funny story: Aloof Dog Owner Shakes on Insidious Business Deal with Roxie

Aloof Dog Owner Shakes on Insidious Business Deal with Roxie

Laura Preston of Old Oak, Missouri, had no idea what soul-crushing deal she would be solidifying when she prompted six-year-old retriever, Roxie, for a paw last Friday night. "I always ask Roxie to shake before I take out the dry food," said Prest...
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Funny story: Pope issues weather report: "It's hotter than hell!"

Pope issues weather report: "It's hotter than hell!"

VATICAN CITY -- While admitting that he's "no scientist," Pope Francis is preparing to issue a papal encyclical (not to be confused with a Popsicle or an icicle) concerning global warming "and other celestial matters." An encyclical is a lesson of...
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Funny story: God Has a Cosmic Sense of Humor, Christopher Hitchins Reports - 'Paradise is not what you expect, mate!'

God Has a Cosmic Sense of Humor, Christopher Hitchins Reports - 'Paradise is not what you expect, mate!'

Heavensgate - Every morning just after sunrise, says Christopher Hitchins, he and the entire heavenly host gather with their harps and neatly folded wings at the edge of a convenient cloud. Then as they drink their coffee and enjoy the air, they laug...
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Funny story: Hell Posts Temporary "No Vacancy" Sign After Hebdo Killers Show Up Today

Hell Posts Temporary "No Vacancy" Sign After Hebdo Killers Show Up Today

HELL - The Devil is complaining that Hell is getting too full of Islamic terrorists who insist on killing innocent people that don't share their same worldview. He hung up a temporary "No Vacancy" sign outside the entrance after accepting the sou...
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Funny story: Pastors Say Jimmy Carter Is Going To Hell

Pastors Say Jimmy Carter Is Going To Hell

Two North Carolina Baptist pastors are observing President Jimmy Carter's 90th birthday by suggesting that he might go to hell for saying that Jesus wouldn't discriminate against LGBT people. Pastor David McManus accused Carter of embracing the "h...
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Funny story: Jerry Springer Nearly Dies and Goes to Hell; Rumble Ensues

Jerry Springer Nearly Dies and Goes to Hell; Rumble Ensues

HELL---Longtime tabloid talk show host Jerry Springer was pronounced dead from a gorilla attack on Friday, soon after beginning his Final Thought segment at the end of the show, but was eventually revived by EMTs at the scene. Friday's show, which...
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Funny story: Rick Perry: "Illegal Children Taking Over Favorite Wal-Mart"

Rick Perry: "Illegal Children Taking Over Favorite Wal-Mart"

Texas Gov Rick Perry said in an emotional interview today that his favorite Wal-Mart is being over-run with illegal children! "I couldn't even get to the snack bar" a frustrated Perry proclaimed "it was like Korea in there"! Concerns about the...
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Funny story: Satan Responds To Complaints of Poor WiFi Coverage In Hell

Satan Responds To Complaints of Poor WiFi Coverage In Hell

Responding to the growing complaints about Hell's sketchy wireless coverage, Satan issued an internal memo this week pointing out what he believes should be brutally obvious to even the most narcissistic damned - you're in Hell. The tone of the me...
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Funny story: God Admits: "Pope Francis is right. The jig's up. There is no hell."

God Admits: "Pope Francis is right. The jig's up. There is no hell."

HEAVEN--In an interview God held with CNN's Anderson Cooper on Sunday, He admitted that Pope Francis was right when he said, "The church no longer believes in a literal hell where people suffer. This doctrine is incompatible with the infinite love of...
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Funny story: Baphomet

Baphomet

"To think I kissed her (or him) there--and there--and ''there''! - Sarah Michelle Gellar Although some contend that Baphomet is a Marvel Comics super-villain, Baphomet is really the demon of parties and partygoers west of the Mississippi. As such, he (or she) is often depicted at parties in Las Vegas, Hollyweird, and various family nudist camps in Arizona and New Mexico, and some Oregonians inc...
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Funny story: State of emergency declared after hell freezes over...

State of emergency declared after hell freezes over...

Hell was struggling to return to normal just days after a massive storm dumped more than 3 feet of snow in much of the area. By early Sunday evening, reported power outages numbered fewer than 2,800, down from as many as 2,801 a day earlier. Most...
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Funny story: Jesse James shoots Ned Kelly!

Jesse James shoots Ned Kelly!

Ned Kelly, Irish-catholic, Australian rebel and bandit has just been buried after he lost a shoot-out with Jesse James in heaven. The whole thing started after a fight in a saloon called "Heaven and Hell Whores and Nuns". Jesse called Ned an Irish...
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