"Razors have sharp edges" stated H&S Executive Everard Fortescue today after the release of a shocking shock report on shaving accidents in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.
"People are bleeding" says Mr Fortescue - "an...
A pet tortoise disappeared from a house in Hooselow but was discovered after five minutes scooting back through the side entrance.
This could well be a world record for the return of a pet tortoise. Most tortoises disappear for weeks at a time, an...
Train carriages could soon be built to give better passenger protection against those engaging in extreme flatulence, following a three-year study.
Scientists have devised a set of key changes that could contain explosive blasts and reduce the amo...
New York - Mayor Michael Bloomberg made the Big Apple less appetizing to the city's cannibal community today, introducing a new Health Department regulation that limits flesh eating to "one pound per person per day."
The restriction came on the he...
NEW YORK CITY (ABSNN) - City Health Inspectors rated the restaurant owned by Lady Gaga "at below 'C' level for 42 critical sanitation violations."
The very best rating is "A."
The report was released today and was actually a re-inspection of...
Sparks and Mensa, the high street department store for the fashion conscious and intelligent, has announced the launch of it's new range of Health and Safety clothing.
"Hi-viz jackets are useful," said range designer, Wok Gann. "What they're not i...
The horrendous accident occurred at somewhere around nine am this morning in a warehouse on an industrial estate in Burnley, Lancashire, owned by Spoffco, a novelty greetings card company.
Alert employees immediately called the emergency services...
In a shock move the Health and Safety Executive has announced a ban on stairs.
A spokesman said that they had been considering this move for some time and had now reached a firm conclusion. Balls House, headquarters of the Labour Party, announced...
Lessons in swimming for children up to the age of eleven have been cancelled in Dorking after a local fire safety marshal deemed the Dorking Leisure Centre swimming baths unsafe, and a fire hazard.
"It is impossible to get thirty children out of t...
Building Inspectors in the small town of Walnut Grove, Minnesota, have called a house, built by the owner "a death trap" and that the residence needs to be demolished or brought up to code by the end of week.
The house has no smoke alarms, an ope...
The Safety in the Home Instructional Task-force has produced its recommendations to cut down on accidents in the home. The main outcome of the five year study is that the slippers are to blame for just over half of all home based accidents.
"In fi...
The Internet Health & Safety Monitoring & Investigation Unit, are looking into claims of relatives of an elderly Spoofer, Inchcock Chambers, of Nottingham, that he suffered a setback in his cardiac recovery programme, caused by the site being...
Nottingham Health & Safety Executive have closed stalls down at a local Charity Fair, that was being held over the weekend, in support of the Lithuanian & Bulgarian Immigrants Benefit Claiming Association Inc.
The Council's Chief Executive...
Government and health officials are being urged to take action over safety issues relating to propelling pencils.
The call comes after a weekend when a local man "narrowly escaped death" while trying to replace the lead in his Yard-O-Led pencil.
All red tape and bureaucracy is the target for the Government which wants to free up the business world. A shining example has come to light in the private health initiative which has been providing breast implants. Funding the cheapest possible opti...
After an extensive study lasting three years, the government's panel on Health and Safety in Britain have come to the conclusion that stair rails, or banisters, should not be smooth.
"There was an accident in 2008," said the government's chief Hea...
The Health and Safty Executive (HSE) have issued a directive regarding the body storage of Colonel Gaddafi, the former Libyan dictator.
In a directive issued to Libya's National Transitional Council, the HSE's representative in the region, Mustaph...
Something of a kerfuffle has erupted across Europe recently after little Alfie B. Chapman took a tumble during an overly competitive game of 'tag' in the back yard of friend and neighbor Deirdre E. Findlay.
It seems that during a rather enthusiast...