Washington, DC Republican Speaker of the House John Boehner admitted calling the police on President Obama due to what he said was "terrible blight" conditions at the White House.
"Obama has let the grass get knee-high, with a couple of junk cars...
Abington, PA- Local resident, Steven Mayer, of Abington, Pennsylvania, awoke this morning with a renewed sense of anticipation and vigor. "I was able to turn off the alarm a minute before 6:00," reported the 32 year old Mayer, who works as a daytime...
Your Home, USA - Sources have reported that the child you have abandoned years ago is on your front step right now and is gearing up to knock on your door.
The child, who was conceived 13 years ago at a Red Roof Inn Motel out by the airport, has t...
Santa Cruz, CA - "Bad Buoys, Bad Buoys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you?" You might recognize the theme song for the newest reality show to debut from California amidst their worst drought in years and ongoing, severe water...
Despite Estimate, one of HRH Queen Elizabeth's horses accidentally getting contaminated food in its nosh bag, this year has seen many high points for the Queen's horses, the Palace said this morning. "Some of the horses that her nags mix with though,...
Self Righteous Sporting Goods Corporation recently announced that their employee health plan will no longer cover medication for erectile dis-function (ED) unless the employee is married, Christian, and seeking to procreate. The closely-held retail c...
The transfer situation at Leeds United has "gone into meltdown" as Dave Hockaday has admitted that "all the good players we (Leeds) want to sign won't be able to adapt to the amazing diamond formation the club now plays better than who we've got."...
Rome - Snubbed by The Holy Father, New York Mayor Bill de Blasio had a private audience with The Godfather on the first day of his Italian vacation. The meeting paid off immediately, with the mob boss agreeing to take over the operation of the New Yo...
Tea, coffee and sandwich sales have rocketed at H.M.P. Isle of Wight Visitor Centre due to a Sat Nav mix up.
A recent initiative by the Isle of Wight Tourist Institute, hoping to sell the Island as a holiday destination and not just an amalgamat...
London - One of Queen Elizardbirth's ghastly corgis has been caught shooting up heroin at a Kennel Club party.
Royal Protection Racket sniffer dogs caught canine smack head Duchess Kate walking the dog in Rotten Row, London's top hangout for palac...
After discovering huge amounts of morphine in the Queen's horse (one of many) the royal vet, Sir Humphrey Nag, a renowned horse whisperer, issued the following statement:
"The Queen's horse, who shall remain anonymous, has confirmed the fact that...
AUSTIN, Texas - Gov. Rick Perry believes that unaccompanied children entering the U.S. illegally should be rounded up and forced to work in children's TV programming as offbeat public housing neighbors, custodial help or slick, streetwise hustlers, a...
A new movement for a special day of celebration is popular with the President, backed by Senator McCain, with enthusiasm showing in the mainstream press.
The Blame Russia and Putin Day, or BRAP Day, is gathering steam.
A summer day, probably in...
Millionaire ordinary baby, Prince George seems to have astounded everyone by being one year old on his first birthday. This fantastic and uplifting development has taken many people's minds off the reality of a terrible plane crash and alleged wholes...
McAllen, TX - A Honduran woman accidentally let the cat out of the bag yesterday when she unwittingly explained to a reporter the real reason she and tens of thousands of her fellow Latin American citizens travelled thousands of miles was for the...
A new research study out today shows that the nations poor, as defined by poverty rates, are smoking more crack than ever now that legal pot prices are souring! "I can't even afford a roach now" said 22 year old stoner Cody Nevins. "Crack is by far t...
Arlington, TX-A group of local divorce lawyers have teamed up with Jerry Jones, owner of the Dallas Cowboys, to offer a newfangled way of delivering divorce notices to spouses.
They will put them on the over 3,000 Sony® LCD displays around th...
Calls to promote England cricket's new young hero, Joe Root, to captain were welcomed around the world today.
The 22-year-old who has scored centuries in back-to-back tests is being hailed as the man save England cricket following the dismal run u...