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Funny story: Election Thoughts with Reverend W A Spooner

Election Thoughts with Reverend W A Spooner

Mood Gorning, I tant to walk today about the forthcoming General Election, which is only wee threeks away and is constantly deing biscussed in all the marious vedia. Some of you might fe beeling a fittle led up of all the telection alk and may creel like frying out: "I stan't cand many ore of this! I wish I fas war away hom frere." To all of you I say: "I hear you and I understand". It al...
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Funny story: Amazing Conspiracy Revealed

Amazing Conspiracy Revealed

A secret document has been passed to Spoof stringer Joseph Waterloo. which reveals the fact that the main political parties in Britain are conspiring to stop people voting. The plan has been devised by an inner circle of powerful people from both...
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Funny story: Scottish Labour Leader Jim Murphy's head size preventing him from leading normal life

Scottish Labour Leader Jim Murphy's head size preventing him from leading normal life

Jim Murphy, leader of the Scottish Labour Party, has admitted struggling with enlarged head syndrome which kicked in as a teenager and worsened as he got older. Jim's head accounts for 30% of his entire body weight and that it's becoming harder to st...
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Funny story: Tory Party to lose election after Angel from Heaven tells poverty stricken single mum not to worry

Tory Party to lose election after Angel from Heaven tells poverty stricken single mum not to worry

A single mother, struggling to get by on the two low paid jobs , says she has was visited by an Angel the other night. The mother who has being trying to scrape money together to buy herself shoes but put her kids first, says the Angel has assured he...
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Funny story: 'I swear' political ad runs in to trouble as Cameron overheard swearing

'I swear' political ad runs in to trouble as Cameron overheard swearing

The 'Ballot Ballad', a Skye News mash up presenting the Political Leaders as ready to promise ANYTHING, in their bid for votes, has run into difficulty. A bootleg version of the piece includes audio of the PM , using most un Eton - like language,...
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Funny story: Political Leaders cash in on Easter Theme

Political Leaders cash in on Easter Theme

Messrs Cameron, Osborne , Miliband et al are cashing in on the time of Year, to gain votes. Mr Camron is quoted saying, that , the Tories will ''rise again'', though associates say this may be a reaction to his wife's prolonged absence and possibl...
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Funny story: Party Leaders stop at nothing to gain votes

Party Leaders stop at nothing to gain votes

Kissing babies, stroking hedgehogs, now the Election Candidates are ready to take part in Sunday Night Dramas and Reality TV, to up their ratings. We understand that Nigel Farage will appear in a crowd scene in 'Poldark', as an angered 'winnower',...
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Funny story: Stressed-out pollsters admit they have no clue who'll win the election

Stressed-out pollsters admit they have no clue who'll win the election

The general election is now less than 6 weeks away, making this the busy season for polling companies. With the election looking harder to call than BT customer service on a Sunday afternoon, these pollsters have been working round the clock to crunc...
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Funny story: Cameron and Osborne deny they are class bigots

Cameron and Osborne deny they are class bigots

David Cameron and a wooden effigy of Chancellor George Osborne have denied they are class bigots who plan to reintroduce medieval feudalism if re elected. Perched on horses and speaking at a torchlit pre-election press conference in a Norman castle,...
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Funny story: Seven Party Political Death Match

Seven Party Political Death Match

The seven largest UK political parties have announced they will partake in a tag-team death match before the results of the looming election are revealed. The event will be staged at Wembley Stadium and fights will involve key members of the Blues...
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Funny story: My Election Thoughts

My Election Thoughts

I know you have all been waiting for this announcement before deciding how to vote in the next election, so - now is the time to give you the guidance needed to secure the future of the British Empire. We owe it to Nelson and to Wellington - the eye, arm and boot of our glorious history - to keep right on to the end of the road. Now looking at the riders in the forthcoming contest we can see...
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Funny story: Britain's right to Vote stripped from those on Welfare, Disability and War pensions

Britain's right to Vote stripped from those on Welfare, Disability and War pensions

Iain Duncan Smith, Secretary of State for Work and Pensions announced today that anyone on benefits, disability (PIP), tax credits or war pension would not be eligible to vote in the forthcoming elections this year and new legislation was being fast...
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Funny story: Channel 4 debate with Cameron and Miliband to be SEXED up with Ant and Dec

Channel 4 debate with Cameron and Miliband to be SEXED up with Ant and Dec

The TV debate due on the 26th of March on Channel 4 and Sky between David Cameron and Ed Miliband looks likely to bore the arse of millions of UK viewers. TOP advertisers at Channel 4 have threatened to pull the plug on the debate unless the TV...
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Funny story: Ed Miliband rehearses for 'empty chair' debate by debating empty chair

Ed Miliband rehearses for 'empty chair' debate by debating empty chair

With the possibility that David Cameron could be "empty-chaired" in the TV election debates, Ed Miliband has been prepping for his appearance by debating an empty chair in private rehearsals. "Ed is very concerned about credibility", an insider to...
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Funny story: Labour Leader Decides to Campaign on TV Debates

Labour Leader Decides to Campaign on TV Debates

There was shock in Westminster when the Leader of the Opposition, one Ed Miliband, declared his party's main issue in the impending election. "As a party we have in the past fought elections based on the economy, the future of the NHS, unemploymen...
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Funny story: Cameron tells jobless "Wear blindfolds in supermarkets or lose benefits."

Cameron tells jobless "Wear blindfolds in supermarkets or lose benefits."

The Prime Minister has announced plans to introduce the wearing of blindfolds in supermarkets for all benefit claimants which will be introduced of the Tories win the next General Election in May. The new requirement will apply to anyone claiming...
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Funny story: Preparing For Erection Day - Cameron is truly the cock of the walk

Preparing For Erection Day - Cameron is truly the cock of the walk

May 7th has been set as Britain's Great Erection Day when the Party with the most seats will win the erection. Labour & Conservatives are neck and neck but could be upset by the SNP throwing a caber into the erection battle. Tory big knob,...
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Funny story: Mind Over Money: Ed Balls Solves the Budget Crisis

Mind Over Money: Ed Balls Solves the Budget Crisis

Ed Balls has been finding it difficult to come up with a suitable infallible authority to point the way forward for Labour's next election. Yup! He tells us that Marx and Engels are, well, a bit old hat, Stalin a bit nasty, and as for Trotsky, we...
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Breaking News...

97% of Climatologists Fudged Data, Proven Wrong

As scientific fraud of massive proportions is unraveled, climatologists all over the world 'feel the heat'. "Even the NASA photographs of the Earth's poles were doctored," said an investigator.
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