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Funny satire stories about Francois Hollande

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French ban Coca Cola refills because it causes too many "Qui Qui's!"

Funny story: French ban Coca Cola refills because it causes too many "Qui Qui's!"

France has decided to ban all unlimited refills of fizzy, sugar filled soft drinks because their sewerage system is overloaded and rats swimming in the sewers are becoming obese (those above ground too)! French dentists have also complained to the...

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U.S. Citizens To Be Used As Anti-Terrorist Sentries Around Europe

French President Francois Hollande today thanked three U.S. citizens for their brave intervention on a packed Subway train after their actions thwarted a heavily armed terrorist and undoubtedly saved dozens of innocent lives. Mr Hollande wasted no...

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Rib eye beef not the only Colorado delicacy on White House dinner menu tonight?

Funny story: Rib eye beef not the only Colorado delicacy on White House dinner menu tonight?

Washington - A slap-up meal in a specially erected South Lawn 'choom room' - uh, event tent! - tonight will feature the State of Colorado's finest produce, White House spokesman Jay Carney said today. Much thought had gone into menu creation for t...

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Francois Hollonde declares: "Let her eat cake!" Valerie Trierweller slams window on his genitals!

New pictures published in the Paris newspaprers this morning show a bloodied and bent Francois Hollande crawling out of a window at the Presidential mansion in Paris. He is seen holding a motorcycle helmet over his genitals and and staggering to a wa...

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Zut alors! French president's secret slut 'is really his new wife!'

Funny story: Zut alors! French president's secret slut 'is really his new wife!'

Paris, France - "Zee lady eez no two-dime ho," is how an Élysée Palace spokesman put it, "she eez zee new First Lady of France!" The giant PR admission comes as the French media suddenly upgrades its original 'bit on the side' profile of blond act...

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France start military action against Mail

Funny story: France start military action against Mail

France have today started to deploy troops against The Mail group of newspapers. The French President François Hollande released a statement this morning: "We have deployed troops to finally deal with the menace of 'The Mail'. For over a hundred year...

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Onion Terror - Francois Hollande announces new policies

In a landmark speech made by Hollande in Holland, the French Premier announced that the Euro will be replaced with a "vibrant form of bartering". In the outlined proposals, a fisting will equal one Euro, a flick of the Testicles is worth ten Eur...

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New French President named after English girls' public school

Funny story: New French President named after English girls' public school

Paris - The Francis Holland School's motto 'That our daughters may be as the polished corners of the Temple' is something of a puzzle the Elysee Palace said today. But it does nothing to dispel the 'champagne socialist' tag about President Francoi...

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Breaking news…

Putin Hacked The Emmys

NBC, ABC, and CBS all claim that Russian President Putin hacked the Emmy Award computers, to explain how unknown, barely-viewed shows on Netflix and HBO could win so many awards.
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