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Funny satire stories about Food Poisoning

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Santa Fez Cops Hospitalized After Eating Chainsaw Repair Sushi

Funny story: Santa Fez Cops Hospitalized After Eating Chainsaw Repair Sushi

Dozens of Santa Fez police officers were sickened after eating suspect sushi provided by a caterer that normally provides chainsaw sharpening and repairs in this small New Mexico town. Police Dis-information Officer, Reggie Gruet, said the busines...

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Trump Has Big Effect On Christmas Shopping

Funny story: Trump Has Big Effect On Christmas Shopping

Christmas shopping is of course underway and many shoppers are taking into account future Trump Administration policies as they choose gifts. Since Title X family planning programs and repeal of Obamacare, which provides the GOP will probably effe...

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Italian Shopkeeper Sick of American Who Can't Speak Her Language

Funny story: Italian Shopkeeper Sick of American Who Can't Speak Her Language

Vicenza, Italy - A small, grocery store owner in the Northeastern, Italian town of Vicenza is growing increasingly impatient with an American customer who speaks "bad Italian." Rosa Maria Membroni doesn't see why the American can't learn Italian.

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Ship Wreck Survivors Rescued By Cruise Ship Die From Food Poisining

Funny story: Ship Wreck Survivors Rescued By Cruise Ship Die From Food Poisining

After being rescued since being lost at sea for nearly two weeks, shipwreck survivors Jose Luis Mendoza and Angel Carbon died after eating buffet food they were given by the cruise ship that rescued them. In another case of food poisoning and sic...

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Food Poisoning The Latest Weight Loss Craze in Hollywood

Funny story: Food Poisoning The Latest Weight Loss Craze in Hollywood

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Some of the hottest celebrities in Tinseltown have been spotted with shopping carts full of expired foods from their local grocery stores in a strange effort to get on board the latest weight loss epidemic - food poisoning. Accord...

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Now saddle of lamb removed from butchers' shelves

Funny story: Now saddle of lamb removed from butchers' shelves

London - The horse flesh contamination scandal saw a new twist today as the EU ordered a raft of emergency foodstuff bans. From midnight tonight saddle of lamb is banned from all sales outlets along with 'polluted' items on greengrocery shelves.

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Source Of Little Divot Food Poisoning Outbreak Revealed

Funny story: Source Of Little Divot Food Poisoning Outbreak Revealed

'McNab's Kebabs' in the leafy village of Little Divot has been identified as the source of a recent food poisoning outbreak. Last Saturday night eight local clubbers were hospitalised after consuming kebabs following a night out at the 'Shit's and...

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Lady Gaga's NYC eatery designated 'A Gagger' by city health officials

Funny story: Lady Gaga's NYC eatery designated 'A Gagger' by city health officials

NEW YORK CITY (ABSNN) - City Health Inspectors rated the restaurant owned by Lady Gaga "at below 'C' level for 42 critical sanitation violations." The very best rating is "A." The report was released today and was actually a re-inspection of...

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Cameron Tells Britain's Starving To Eat Dandylions, Clover, and Roadkill Pheasant!

Funny story: Cameron Tells Britain's Starving To Eat Dandylions, Clover, and Roadkill Pheasant!

Reports from many inner city hospitals show they are now having to treat hundreds of people turning up at A&E suffering from food poisoning. The reason is thought to be directly linked to soaring food prices in the high streets with many starving...

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Pulp Friction - Rob Schneider vs Samuel L Jackson

Funny story: Pulp Friction - Rob Schneider vs Samuel L Jackson

Samuel L. Jackson star of such films as "Snakes on a Plane" and it's box office smash prequel "Rise of the Revenge of Bees on a Crane: This time Payback is Personal" abandons plans to construct a palace made entirely of human hair and egg boxes. B...

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NHS hospitals cut costs by feeding patients with deadly expensive Asian foods!

Funny story: NHS hospitals cut costs by feeding patients with deadly expensive Asian foods!

NHS hospitals are giving their patients foods which have travelled half way around the globe, are half-cooked, unfit for human consumption, but "lethally cost-effective". This new directive is a means of slashing costs drastically and creating a rapi...

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Confusion and FEAR in the Vegetable Garden

Funny story: Confusion and FEAR in the Vegetable Garden

The issue of colicumbers and whether they contained Spanish, German or Dutch diseases has been put on the compost heap where it is hotting up. With lettuces and tomatoes joining in the great FEAR factor eating any vegetables now has become more ri...

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Women to put Condoms on Cucumbers

Funny story: Women to put Condoms on Cucumbers

The relationship between humans and vegetables is a long and complex one. As many as 1 in 5 cucumbers are purchased for use not as food but as a sex toy. A fact that was possibly the best kept secret of the cucumber industry. However, the e-coli o...

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Popeye Dead After Eating E.Coli Tainted Spinach

Funny story: Popeye Dead After Eating E.Coli Tainted Spinach

The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs announced today that Popeye the sailor had died after eating spinach that was tainted with E. Coli bacteria. The USDA had issued warnings concerning possible bacterial exposure from tainted spinach a couple...

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German Dioxin scandal hits Australia

Eggheads in Germany at the Max Headroom Institute have identified that there might be implications of the Dioxin in eggs scandal far beyond the boundaries of Germany. A team of scientists has been sent to Australia in the latest bid to track down...

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German Eggheads lose sense of humour due to Dioxin poisoning

Funny story: German Eggheads lose sense of humour due to Dioxin poisoning

The recent egg poisoning case in Lower Saxony Germany has had far reaching consequences for the local German population including staff at the prestigious Max Headroom Institute for Parking Structures in Wiesleissen. The contamination of German eg...

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Bad Outbreak of Delhi Belly in London

Funny story: Bad Outbreak of Delhi Belly in London

A bad outbreak of dissentary mixed up with e-coli and alexsalmonella happened today in West London, and health and safety officials quickly traced it to The Bengal Lancer restaurant in Southall. The illness - nicknamed 'Delhi belly' due to the unp...

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Ten Members of House of Lords Stricken With Food Poisoning

Funny story: Ten Members of House of Lords Stricken With Food Poisoning

London, UK - A family who donated their deceased father's liver to medical science is sadden by the news that it ended up on the buffet table of the House Of Lords as a pâté during the Queen's birthday celebrations, causing ten members to become viol...

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Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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