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Funny story: First Lady Wants to Hire Nuns to Discipline Unhealthy Shoppers

First Lady Wants to Hire Nuns to Discipline Unhealthy Shoppers

San Francisco - First Lady Michelle Obama has unveiled her latest plans for getting the nation to adopt her healthy eating guidelines and this one might hurt a bit. After tackling the country's school lunch program and transforming it into a train...
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Funny story: Former NY Mayor Bloomberg, Michelle Obama Fight Release of Upcoming Movie, 'The Splurge'

Former NY Mayor Bloomberg, Michelle Obama Fight Release of Upcoming Movie, 'The Splurge'

New York City - Warner Bros. studio has announced plans to make a new movie called 'The Splurge' after the success of 'The Purge' films. But not everyone is happy about the idea. 'The Splurge' is about a 12-hour period one night each year when...
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Funny story: Manhattan Island Sinks Beneath Hudson

Manhattan Island Sinks Beneath Hudson

Due to the increase in beverage and meal portion sizes in restaurants, there was a noticeable increase in water levels around the island of Manhattan. The locals were too busy eating their XTRA-LARGE beverages and Big Macs to notice that their isl...
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Funny story: Royals Donate Their Dead Horses To Food Centres For The Poor

Royals Donate Their Dead Horses To Food Centres For The Poor

Dead nags, ponies and racehorses will be dragged to soup kitchens and refuges on Princess Annie's suggestion, it was revealed to our Royal correspondent this morning". "Watch this space" said the philanthropic Princess, "we may be sending grouse,...
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Funny story: Michelle Obama Vows to Defend Her School Lunch Program "Til the Bitter End"

Michelle Obama Vows to Defend Her School Lunch Program "Til the Bitter End"

Minneapolis - While it's not exactly a "Remember the Alamo!" battle cry, First Lady Michelle Obama is screeching that she will defend her signature school lunch program 'til the bitter end.' Ironically, this is how a majority of Americans view...
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Funny story: Local Man Cuts Styrofoam Plate With Plastic Fork

Local Man Cuts Styrofoam Plate With Plastic Fork

A local Springfield man inadvertently cut through his styrofoam plate with a plastic fork yesterday while eating at a church potluck supper. Monty Creosote was in the basement of the First Lutheran Church of Springfield eating during the church's...
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Funny story: North Korean Leader Fascinated by Beatles

North Korean Leader Fascinated by Beatles

Pyongyang, North Korea Rotund North Korean leader Kim Jong Un has been mostly a mystery to western journalists since he took power after the death of his eccentric despotic dad, Kim Jong Il. However new revelations about young Kim will help political...
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Funny story: Chicken Tastes Most Like Chicken Of All Things That Taste Like Chicken

Chicken Tastes Most Like Chicken Of All Things That Taste Like Chicken

Springdale, AR - Of all the foods across the world that taste like chicken, a study has found that chicken tastes most like chicken. The study was carried out by Tyson Foods, Inc. (NYSE: TSN), the world's second largest producer of not only chick...
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Funny story: Digester's Reader - Pretty Meat

Digester's Reader - Pretty Meat

As health and energy foods are becoming increasingly popular for a culture completely obsessed with 'self', this edition of Digester's Reader has a look at one of the newest additions that could take the market by storm: Pretty Meat. With the cost and availability of meats that we have known for so long now headed in opposite, and less than pleasing directions along with the recent UN mandate t...
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Funny story: UFO Sightings Up, Fat People Disappearing.

UFO Sightings Up, Fat People Disappearing.

Professor Montgomery of a Think Tank located in West Virginia rural area say that they have become alarmed at the both the sightings of UFOs in the sky and a growing list of missing fat people. "We now believe that the connection is that whoever i...
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Funny story: New Squirrel Crust & Moose Meat Pizza Outrages and Intrigues

New Squirrel Crust & Moose Meat Pizza Outrages and Intrigues

Dominik's Pizza has announced that it has launched a new specialty pizza with a squirrel-based crust, a move that has many mouths watering and animal activists frothing. The Rocket J. Squirrel Specialty Pizza is available to customers today at the...
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Funny story: Georgia Man Wins Right To Eat Cat

Georgia Man Wins Right To Eat Cat

A Tybee Island man has been given the all clear by the District Attorney to eat his pet cat paving the way for more Americans to cook, fry, boil and roast their pets. The landmark decision is seen as triumph for civil liberties claim many watche...
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Funny story: New Mouse Flavoured Cat Food Is a Hit

New Mouse Flavoured Cat Food Is a Hit

Cats across the United States are licking their paws and purring with culinary satisfaction after a Georgia man's new cat food recipe was added to pet food manufacturers stock lists and is now available on supermarket shelves the length and breadth o...
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Funny story: Forgotten Yogurt Mourned

Forgotten Yogurt Mourned

An unopened yogurt quietly expired last night after spending several days lodged between a shriveled tomato and a jar of mayonnaise in a Florida mans refrigerator. The yogurt, purchased in mid November, was survived by a can of diet coke and a blo...
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Funny story: Pears Downgraded from Fruit to Dwarf-fruit

Pears Downgraded from Fruit to Dwarf-fruit

In a move that has stunned and outraged pear aficionados around the world, pears have been downgraded from a fruit to a dwarf fruit. The move comes after the latest annual conference of the International Fruit Tree Association, or IFTA. The conferenc...
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Funny story: Today's recipes

Today's recipes

PAINS PERDUS (Lost bread) Make a shallow dish with little essence of butter it easier, add pepper, thyme and eggs, both sides. Pour the saucepan (bain marie). Boil together a little white sauce, and let it for the following day boil for a lemon and then draw it simmer gently at a leaf or three bay-leaves, one and cut through a tomato sauce from top or with the pigeons on to every now and when the...
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Funny story: George W. Bush Announces He Has Opened Up The Wieners of Mass Destruction Hot Dog Diner

George W. Bush Announces He Has Opened Up The Wieners of Mass Destruction Hot Dog Diner

DALLAS - Former President George W. Bush has just stated that he is as happy as a tickless country coonhound. The ex-president who along with Dickie Cheney and Donnie Rumsfeld cooked up the cockamamie story about the so-called Weapons of Mass Dest...
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Funny story: Paul Ryan Releases Budget Report: Just Kill The Poor People

Paul Ryan Releases Budget Report: Just Kill The Poor People

Paul Ryan's much anticipated budget report was released and as expected he really sticks it to America's poor, in fact he kills them! The new strategy called "Soylent Purple" amazingly cuts spending and balances the budget is just six months. I...
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