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Funny satire stories about Fireworks

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Funny story: Candles ignite stripper's fart: explosion injures 20 Shriners in Massachusetts!

Candles ignite stripper's fart: explosion injures 20 Shriners in Massachusetts!

SPRINGIELD, Massachusetts (ABSNN) - A nude dancer performing an "amazing, near flawless split" accidentally passed gas and nearby table candles ignited the fart "causing a huge natural gas explosion at the Scores Gentlemen's Club," say fire fighters...
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Funny story: Out of control fireworks blow up Heaven

Out of control fireworks blow up Heaven

Las Vegas, Nevada - Just when we thought we had "smoothed things over" with the Almighty, some dingle berry sets His house on fire. A fireworks display in Las Vegas, Nevada, reported to be the largest in the world, went completely crazy during a J...
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Funny story: South Carolina Holds First Annual Zombie Shoot and Barbecue

South Carolina Holds First Annual Zombie Shoot and Barbecue

From June 23 to July 04, South Carolina will host the first ever South Carolina Zombie Shoot and Barbecue. The event will be hosted by Gov. Nikki Haley and Sen. Jim De Mint and barbecue events will be officiated by Pit Masters Kevin Roberts, Myron Mi...
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Funny story: North Korea Admits Giant Firework Was A Dud

North Korea Admits Giant Firework Was A Dud

PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA--In a rare and unprecedented move, North Korean officials have been forced to admit that their 90-ton firework was a complete and utter dud. The entertainment device, which North Korea has assured the world was the largest a...
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Funny story: Dutch males prefer fireworks and bangers to sex!

Dutch males prefer fireworks and bangers to sex!

Venlo, Holland: As the new year approaches it seems that Dutch men prefer "banging" in the new with their fireworks instead of "banging" it in with their wives and partners. Tons of gun-powder are about to be exploded into the air this evening, bu...
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Funny story: Selena Gomez Reveals Her Long Time Secret Phobia To Justin Bieber

Selena Gomez Reveals Her Long Time Secret Phobia To Justin Bieber

HOLLYWOOD - Selena Gomez recently stated that she has never been happier than when she is with her boyfriend Justin Bieber. Gomez said that the thing that makes their relationship work is that she is the magnet and he is the steel. She noted that...
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Funny story: New Year's Resolution Suggestions For Some Famous and Infamous Celebrities

New Year's Resolution Suggestions For Some Famous and Infamous Celebrities

Every new year, millions of people make New Year's resolutions which they fully intend to keep. Some people resolve not to drink as much, or smoke as much, or make fun of the faults of their spouses, significant others, or love interests. Many of these New Year's promises have actually lasted as long as four or five weeks, most however do have a tendency of falling by the wayside within 48...
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Funny story: Man City rave about QPR firework display

Man City rave about QPR firework display

Players and fans of Manchester City sat back and enjoyed a sparkling Guy Fawkes party with QPR at Loftus Road on Sunday. "They are the best team we have played this season and it was a pleasure to be outclassed by a top quality side after getting...
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Funny story: Man shoves 37 fireworks up his arse and dies

Man shoves 37 fireworks up his arse and dies

A man who stuck 37 fireworks in his backside has died from fatal burns after a stray roman candle exploded out of sequence. Mario Bollocktelly from Manchester was performing his annual firework arse stuffing extravaganza for local orphans when a C...
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Funny story: American Border Patrols Checking All Vehicles Returning To Canada. Fireworks Being Smuggled.

American Border Patrols Checking All Vehicles Returning To Canada. Fireworks Being Smuggled.

All vehicles returning to Canada from trips to the US of A are being inspected meticulously for smuggled items. This month it is NOT drugs they are looking for but FIREWORKS. News quickly spread through Canada at the beginning of the month that t...
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Funny story: Royal Wedding Firework Ban

Royal Wedding Firework Ban

The UK government has today announced a total ban on all fireworks in advance of the Royal Wedding, which is finally, at last, just around the corner. It is also considering pushing forward a motion to completely outlaw all firework and lighthearted...
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Funny story: Pete Doherty Birthday Party Ends with a Bang

Pete Doherty Birthday Party Ends with a Bang

Fire Engines were last night called to a small German pub to help put out a fire caused by a large explosion that originated from their Beer Garden. The explosion was believed to have come from a fireworks display gone wrong. It was said to have...
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Funny story: Boris insists on capitals fireworks being 'anchored'

Boris insists on capitals fireworks being 'anchored'

Mayor of London Boris Johnson has been labelled a killjoy for his insistence on all fireworks discharged over the weekend being anchored to ensure they land in the borough of origin. 'Cross borough' firework incidents were at an all time high last...
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Funny story: Nokia Enter the Digital Firework Market

Nokia Enter the Digital Firework Market

Nokia entered the ever growing digital firework market this week with the Nokia Vesuvius Express Music 3X-MDF. This top-of-the range firework not only has a touch screen eruption but has a superb built in MP3 player, USB connection and a SIM free 4G...
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Funny story: New, Safe, Digital Fireworks

New, Safe, Digital Fireworks

The weeks leading up to November 5th, always a worrying time for the Fire Brigade and hospitals. Now there's a solution - digital fireworks. Instead of lighting the touchpaper and running for your life, all you need do with the new Digital Fire...
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Funny story: Cher Blows Off Ass With Party Fireworks!

Cher Blows Off Ass With Party Fireworks!

The singer Cher is reportedly in stable condition this morning after having her ass shot off during a fireworks session last night. "Cher had all these great bangers and cherry bombs and lots of other stuff and invited some kids over so they could...
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Funny story: New Years fireworks are banned in Pakistan, Iraq and Afghanistan, much too dangerous

New Years fireworks are banned in Pakistan, Iraq and Afghanistan, much too dangerous

Ahead of the New Year celebrations several countries have decided to ban fireworks and firework displays because they feel they are much too dangerous! In Baghdad there was a fireworks display planned but it has been banned because several childre...
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Funny story: Fumbling Firework Farce Finally Fades

Fumbling Firework Farce Finally Fades

Firework shop "Bang and a Whimper" have announced they will be closing down their Fullham branch down next month due to flimsy sales. The specialist firework retailer is now a ticking time bomb set to explode and evaporate from history. Jonathan Reed...
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Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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