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Funny satire stories about Firemen

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Funny story: Man With Bladder Problem Sets Ass on Fire

Man With Bladder Problem Sets Ass on Fire

Howard Finney has given up his most comforting item because he nearly burned to death Tuesday night. "I will have to wear a lot of lotion and adult diapers for awhile", he told $tar$ reporter, George Hill. "I guess my bladder probably saved my lif...
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Funny story: Detroit To Replace All Fire Engine Dalmatians With Chihuahuas

Detroit To Replace All Fire Engine Dalmatians With Chihuahuas

DETROIT - Mayor Dave Bing of Detroit has just issued a Mayoral Directive stating that effective September 20, at 12:15 a.m. every fire station that has a dalmatian as a firehouse mascot will have to turn their dog over to the Detroit Animal Shelter.
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Funny story: Five police cars sent to calm down 150 women at a 'Ladies night' when heartthrob Fabio didn't turn up!!

Five police cars sent to calm down 150 women at a 'Ladies night' when heartthrob Fabio didn't turn up!!

Pontyates, near Llanelli, South Wales: In the Welsh valleys yonder there, there is a cry in the mist. "Fabio, Fabio, where is thou Fabio?" At the Baltic Inn and Restaurant, no less, 150 Welsh Ladies arrived to see their favourite one, Fabio.
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Funny story: Firefighters: "We're being discriminated against by impersonators" - Too many police, not enough firefighter impersonators, says union

Firefighters: "We're being discriminated against by impersonators" - Too many police, not enough firefighter impersonators, says union

Just two days after a second man was arrested for allegedly impersonating a police officer, the president of the local firefighters union said his organization is considering filing a lawsuit claiming discrimination against firefighters. "You he...
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Funny story: Man Sets Fire to Hedge 'So Fire Brigade Would Hose his Lawn'

Man Sets Fire to Hedge 'So Fire Brigade Would Hose his Lawn'

A Dorking resident was so frustrated he couldn't water his lawn under the current hosepipe ban that he deliberately set fire to a neighbour's hedge, in the hope that the emergency services - by extinguishing it - would simultaneously water his grass.
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Funny story: Dorking pensioner traps testicles during shower

Dorking pensioner traps testicles during shower

A pensioner had to be taken to hospital after they caught their testicles in a shower seat last week. Dorking fire crews were called out to the pensioner's house in Dorking on April 6th to help cut them free after getting their private parts trapp...
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Funny story: London Fire Brigade Cutbacks Could lead to strike

London Fire Brigade Cutbacks Could lead to strike

London fire fighters were sent a memo yesterday stating that every fire officer must consume two litres of water before going on duty. They will also be required to drink a further three litres of water when on duty at their stations. The memo said t...
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Funny story: Camden Loses 200 Police, Afraid Drug Lords Will Take Over Like in Mexico!

Camden Loses 200 Police, Afraid Drug Lords Will Take Over Like in Mexico!

Camden, New Jersey has had to lay off about half of it's police force due to budget cuts while citizens fear to go out. Also, a good part of the fire fighters were also laid off. "After that vote yesterday where the judge said that he would not...
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Funny story: Scandal! 2,700 London Firefighters Moonlight As Spoof Writers!

Scandal! 2,700 London Firefighters Moonlight As Spoof Writers!

An intensive investigation of what's hot and what's not, has revealed that over 2,700 of London's 5,900 firefighters are moonlighting as Spoofers, and collecting a housing allowance while NOT living in London! To encourage the public service emplo...
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Funny story: End of Whoop & Wail

End of Whoop & Wail

Congress has passed a bill which will standardize the siren tones used by emergency services across the county for the first time. Rather than use the common Whoop and Wail style siren, a two-tone siren similar to the old sirens used in the UK and p...
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Funny story: Firehouse Burns To The Ground...Again!

Firehouse Burns To The Ground...Again!

Believe it or not, a fire station in Syke, Germany, was destroyed last week after it burned to the ground. It took six fire engines with it along with equipment, cost over # million dollars by early estimates, according to the Austrian Times. The...
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Funny story: Fire Service Cutbacks

Fire Service Cutbacks

The Greater Manchester Fire Service has announced that it has to find savings of thirty percent over the coming financial year. Unions are adamant that no fire service personnel will be lost, with the service already running at the safe minimum numbe...
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Funny story: Welsh Transvestite Fireman in Snake Shock!

Welsh Transvestite Fireman in Snake Shock!

The sleepy town of Blackwood in Wales was in shock today as one of it's fire fighting heroes, Simon Bevman, was strangled to death in the high street by a 15ft python. Initial reports indicate that Mr Bevman had just left the chemist after buying a l...
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Funny story: Bournemouth bans fire extinguishers as a danger to fires

Bournemouth bans fire extinguishers as a danger to fires

Very sensible risk assessors in Bournemouth - known as 'Wrinkly City' - have decided that fire extinguishers are to be banned from high rise flats in the city.
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Funny story: Disabled trainee fireman sues Health and Safety Executive

Disabled trainee fireman sues Health and Safety Executive

A disabled trainee fireman, who has been training at a fire station for the past 6 years, is suing the Health and Safety Executive because they are banning him from qualifying as a fireman.
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Funny story: Sister Act actress trapped in chimney

Sister Act actress trapped in chimney

Big boned comedian Kathy Nijimy, who played a jolly nun in the Sister Act movies is fighting for her life after getting trapped in a chimney.
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Funny story: Cutty Sark Adds To Global Warming Threat

Cutty Sark Adds To Global Warming Threat

The Cutty Sark which is still on fire, could pose a threat to the world's climate through increased Global Warming, it has been claimed. The ship, which was undergoing a £25million refit with a view to being put...
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Funny story: Trapped girl fights firemen while waiting for media attention.

Trapped girl fights firemen while waiting for media attention.

Tracey Chambers, 6, single-handedly fought off three firemen who were attempting to free her arm from a pipe earlier this morning.
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Dozens of Women Claim Cosby Never Raped Them

Although it's taken since 2006 when rape allegations against Cosby first emerged, his PR firm has managed to find MANY women who encountered Cosby but were never raped by him (to their knowledge).
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