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Funny story: Elastic shortage raises risk of low-slung underwear

Elastic shortage raises risk of low-slung underwear

The risk of shortages in supplies of decent elastic this year is increasing, National Elasticity warned yesterday. Recent heat-waves in various parts of the world have ruined the availability of rubber and elastic, and many production companies ha...
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Funny story: Can panty leg elastic save the planet?

Can panty leg elastic save the planet?

Sir Clive Sinclair, well-known for his C5 tricycle and the ZX Spectrum home computer has patented a revolutionary electrical generator that is powered by panty elastic. In a break with tradition, Sir Clive has assigned the patent rights "to all of...
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Plans for Bergdahl Post-CourtMartial Leaked

Another leak from the Empire Palace reveals Barack I will appoint Beau Bergdahl--after his court-martial--as His Excellency's Ambassador to the Taliban, given Bergdahls' extensive connections there.
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