Malibu, Ca - Multi-million dollar seafront mansions owned by Larry Ellison, David Geffen, Paul Allen and assorted small-time Russian money launderers on Malibu's famous Carbon Beach are on full seismic alert ahead of Wednesday's Libra Full Moon.
A...
PORTLAND, Maine (ABSNN) - An earthquake that registered 4.0 struck just west of Portland just before 8 p.m. this evening. The Illuminati has taken responsibility for the temblor and "vows to cause an even greater quake should Mitt Romney fail to be...
Philippines - The 7.9-magnitude quake off Samar Island struck early this morning just as the Pisces Full Moon was waxing into maximum display.
Its aftershocks have rattled Kate and William's Far East holiday plans for yet another taxpayer-funded f...
Co Mayo, Eire - Irish Seismological Survey sources said today they've received reports blaming the Wee People's fracking activities for yesterday's 4-magnitude rattler.
The tremor struck some 23km south-south-east off the Corrib Gas Field operated...
Bologna - The first of the eclipsed Gemini new moon tremors has flattened much of a Northern Italian town 35km north of Bologna.
The 6-magnitude quake struck this morning in the Emilia Romagna district notorious for attracting spent lunar forces.
Indonesia - Two huge shocks that rattled the quake-torn province of Aceh, Indonesia this morning may have dislodged vast sub-oceanic reserves of trapped natural gas off the coast of Western Australia according to reports.
The Carnarvon Basin gas f...
London - It's 14 years since the dodgiest of dodgy Piss Process treaties was signed under a waxing fool moon by Hellfire fantasist Tony B Liar.
Today Government confidence in the 1998 Good Friday Agreement small print suffered a setback as mobile...
LOS ANGELES - It has just been announced to the Hollywood entertainment media that Sky Castle Pictures in association with Lions Face Films will soon begin production on the Durango Grundyweather musical The Etch A Sketch Chronicles.
Mr. Grundywea...
Indonesia - She was informed early as the 7.3 magnitude tremor struck 423km (262 miles) south-west of Banda Aceh at an estimated depth of 29.1 km (18.1 miles) triggering an official tsunami warning along the Pacific Ring of Fire.
Courtiers said to...
Bodmin - The 2.2 magnitude tremor hit the Lizard Peninsula shortly before 3am in what Icke once prophesied would be the first portent of the Reptilian New Dawn.
Some of his New Age conspiracist pals also reckon the quake is a grim precursor to a g...
Germany's out-of-control Roentgen Satellite (Rosat) - seen re-entering the Earth's atmosphere around 02.00GMT - is suspected of causing the 7.3 tremor which struck Eastern Turkey's city of Van today.
Some 20 tonnes of space junk are thought to hav...
An earthquake measuring three point seven on the Richter scale has finally achieved what several decades of political wrangling between Scottish and English politicians has been unable to do: split Scotland from England.
"The earthquake was only s...
YUMA, Arizona - Governor Jan Brewer recently spoke before a gathering of The Retired Saguaro Cactus Breeders Coalition at a local Sand & More Sand Motel convention room where she thanked them for the patience they exhibited in a field that has be...
Within the timespan of just one week, New York City was hit by not just an earthquake but also a hurricane.
Coincidence? Well, no, not according to the Reverend Orville Dick.
This often extreme, always controversial, ex-Florida resident wholehe...
Aleutian Islands - A Spoof writer's Alaskan vacation cruise entered choppy waters on Friday as a 7.1 magnitude tremor struck just 10km below the sea bed 125 miles southeast of Atka.
South Carolina resident Morse's moose-wrestling holiday was on it...
Besides the Washington Monument and the National Cathedral, there was another famous relic that sustained damages during the recent East Coast earthquake.
According to Congressional sources who wish to remain anonymous, Congresswoman's Nancy Pel...
OSKALOOSA, Iowa - Sarah Palin's One Nation Bus Tour pulled into Oskaloosa, Iowa, home of the largest corn cob statue in the world.
Palin's bus was parked at a local Pizza Gal Restaurant where a reporter for Tittle Tattle Tonight, Skippy Viperwater...
Washington, DC-- Tuesday's 5.8 earthquake in the nation's capital has left some damage, most notably the Washington Monument. The iconic obelisk is now leaning, and is in danger of collapsing. Brilliant minds in the Obama administration believe the...