Edited by Lymington Spode.
News:
Mrs Hane from the Bacon Grinders Forum has been awarded "Sow of the year" yet again.
Ardle Pitterfong has returned from the jungles of Borneo
The interesting insect specimens he brought back with him are being removed at the hospital.
Funeral Directors, Mardews of Dorking are offering a two for one special this month.
Church Hall Events:
March...
It was perhaps one of the greatest voyages imaginable which remained as yet unconquered - travelling by dogsled from London to Dorking in the very brief British winter. It was a dream of many men and had claimed more lives than can be counted. But this week Britain's greatest living explorer Sir Ranulph Feinnes finally achieved it on his twenty-fifth attempt.
Upon realising that this weekend th...
Well, what a year it's been. Anyone who lives in Dorking will certainly remember 2012 as a glorious but also tragic year.
January brought snowstorms and blizzards, and the closure of Dorking old folk's home led to hordes of elderly "Eskimos" wandering around the town blocking road junctions. Who can forget the igloo on top of the town hall? Nobody knows where they caught that whale, but its blu...
A local man from Dorking was facing humiliation in the town last night when it was discovered he accidentally mixed up TV experts ITV money saving expert Martin Lewis and Channel 4 property buying expert Phil whatshisname, the bloke who hangs around...
A massive argument has erupted at the annual Dorking Dance Off held at Dorking Town Hall. It started just after the tango as the Bollywood dancers came in while the ballet dancers waited for their turn. As heated looks were exchanged, the belly dance...
There was a tremendous hullabaloo in Dorking today, when a Dorking man saved another Dorking man's life in the busy High Street, Dorking.
Ex-scoutmaster Jethro Crampon, 32, was walking down the road in his full scout uniform when he saw Dorking's...
Amateur photographers and YouTube videographers are on the hunt for the only cat in the world not to have had it's photo taken or been videoed doing something cute and/or amusing.
"We believe the cat is in the Dorking area," said Simon Ease, who i...
Lessons in swimming for children up to the age of eleven have been cancelled in Dorking after a local fire safety marshal deemed the Dorking Leisure Centre swimming baths unsafe, and a fire hazard.
"It is impossible to get thirty children out of t...
Every year the town of Dorking plays host to a very special talent contest - Dorking's Pets Have Got Talent, is a contest to find some of the most talented pets in the Dorking area.
Last year the top prize went to local girl Pippa Middleclass an...
The sex industry, normally turgid even during tough times, has become flaccid in recent months. This is partly due to stiff competition but also due to punters lacking the wad to pay for hookers.
Prostitutes have had to lower their prices to remai...
Residents of London suburb, Dorking, awoke this morning to discover that thieves had stolen every last scrap of metal from the town.
"They came in during the night," said police inspector, Devon Cumbria. "They've taken street lamps, park benches,...
Dorking man Neville Wisconsin has claimed to have discovered the Holy Grail in Dorking itself. He has described the find as "a splendid coincidence" and the culmination of a life's work.
In June of this year, Neville was taking tea at Dorking Tea...
Women's beach volleyball players have been advised not to wear tight fitting bikinis at the 2012 London Olympics.
Athletes in the event have worn skimpy swimwear since the sport was introduced at the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta. Now the change has b...
British hospitals are currently facing significant cuts and changes to the way they operate. However one hospital has managed the amazing feat of massively cutting costs while still exceeding government targets. I took a tour of Dorking's Idi Amin Hospital where the motto is "doctoring is in our blood".
Instead of expensive human nurses tending to patients' needs, they have robot matrons on all...
Dorking Police's amateur hobbyists were celebrating yesterday after sweeping the board at the town's Annual Festival.
The force's enthusiasts picked up the top gongs in contests for painting, photography, acting, gardening... you name it: if there...
Following England's defeat to Italy on penalties at Euro 2012, the Football Association have decided to spend millions of pounds on a new Centre of Excellence designed to make England penalty winners.
Sir Trevor Frooking CBE (Cant Be Easy) announc...
Dorking couple, Doris and Harold Heinz have been arrested after a series of public indecency offences left them in hot water.
"It all started when our new neighbours moved in," said Doris Heinz, 57, who has been bailed, pending trial. "We thought...
Cockney hard man Danny Dyer is to embark on his toughest mission yet: rolling with the tough guys of Britain's amateur satire writing scene, and it's going to get messy.
The six episode series will begin Wednesday on Sky 3, sandwiched between Ross...