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Funny story: Donald Trump Wants To Date Fetus

Donald Trump Wants To Date Fetus

In a bizarre and creepy statement, candidate Donald Trump said he would be dating a supermodel's daughter if he were not married. The only trouble is the "young woman" in question is the as yet to be born daughter of supermodel Taylor Kirsten. Wha...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Dead

Donald Trump Dead

In what must be the most shocking news imaginable for many people in the United States of America, it has, this morning, been reported that Illinois road cleaning operative, Don Trump, has been killed in a horrific road accident whilst minding his ow...
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Funny story: Ted Cruz Attempts to Steal Donald Trump's Thunder by Selecting Failed CEO as His VP Candidate

Ted Cruz Attempts to Steal Donald Trump's Thunder by Selecting Failed CEO as His VP Candidate

Washington-After a miserable showing in this week's primary elections, the Cruz campaign decided that the best way to stop a failed businessman from becoming the Republican nominee was to sign-on a failed businesswoman as his pick for Vice President.
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Funny story: Is Free Pizza Making Candidates Fat?

Is Free Pizza Making Candidates Fat?

Apparently, Ohio Governor John Kasich, running for the Republican nomination of president, is just a fellow who can't say 'no' to a platter of food anywhere or anytime. During one sitting at a New York restaurant, the governor ate: two plates of...
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Funny story: Republicans to Postpone Election Until They Can Get a Candidate that Won't Lose in a Landslide

Republicans to Postpone Election Until They Can Get a Candidate that Won't Lose in a Landslide

Washington, DC The Republican Party admitted that it hadn't a clue on how to get a candidate that could actually win an election for President of the U.S. With recent candidates like John McCain and Mitt Romney that have trouble carrying their home s...
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Funny story: Trump Outlines Financial Plan for Average Americans

Trump Outlines Financial Plan for Average Americans

Donald Trump, self-proclaimed financial wizard, outlined a plan he says that even average Americans can follow to attain what Trump calls "true wealth." "Of course, one wouldn't become as rich as me, but even a small, insignificant person like mos...
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Funny story: Trump Promises Queen a New Castle if She Will Knight Him

Trump Promises Queen a New Castle if She Will Knight Him

New York, NY In talking about his foreign relations abilities, U.S. Presidential wannabe Donald Trump remarked that he could get along well with other world leaders because they probably all admire him and would want to meet him. "I'm telling Quee...
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Funny story: Candidates start a new Earth Day competition: being buried alive

Candidates start a new Earth Day competition: being buried alive

New York -- The presidential candidates came face to face with the essence of Earth Day, The five dug their own graves, were covered with soil, and settled down in a contest to see who could last the longest in an embrace wih Mother Earth. "No nee...
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Funny story: 2016 Cinco de Mayo Celebrations Go All Out In Case Of A Trump Ban

2016 Cinco de Mayo Celebrations Go All Out In Case Of A Trump Ban

Twenty six year old Hunter Young of Boulder Colorado doubts that Donald Trump will be president in 2017, but like many in the US, he's planning to make the 2016 Cinco de Mayo celebration a blow out, just in case. Talking to a TS reporter, Young sa...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Confuses HPV with HIV

Donald Trump Confuses HPV with HIV

At a news conference Sunday, Donald Trump confused HPV with HIV and insisted there was a vaccine available to prevent HIV. "Now they want to vaccinate kids as young as twelve years old for HIV, and it's like telling them it's OK to go and have sex...
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Funny story: Kim Jon-Un Edges Out Putin for Biggest Asshole Leader Award

Kim Jon-Un Edges Out Putin for Biggest Asshole Leader Award

In an annual poll taken by Jerk Magazine, the dictator of North Korea, Kim Jong-Un, has beaten out three-time winner Vladimir Putin as the leader who was the biggest asshole in 2015. "Although there were many contenders as usual, Kim Jong-Un was the hands-down winner this year, what with his nuclear threats and missile tests and labor camps and Putin actually doing something people like this y...
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Funny story: New York Man Inducted Into the Alien Abduction Hall of Fame

New York Man Inducted Into the Alien Abduction Hall of Fame

Wayward New York guy, Donald Meanderson, was just inducted into the Alien Abduction Hall of Fame on the planet Zwinkie Meanderson, who is about as predictable as a football bouncing on the grid iron, gained his induction by predictively showing up...
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Funny story: Dr. Ben Carson Performs Surgery on Trump's Brain

Dr. Ben Carson Performs Surgery on Trump's Brain

UPI: Hospital officials have confirmed that Dr. Ben Carson operated on Donald J. Trump last Thursday in the neurosurgical unit of the world's most elite hospital in Dubai, explaining the Republican frontrunner's uncharacteristic absence from the campaign trail over the past two weeks. Officials declined to offer details, but a leaked interview given by Dr. Carson to the Drudge Report-and intended...
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Funny story: Trump Unveils Foreign Policy Position: Bomb Mexico And Take Their Oil

Trump Unveils Foreign Policy Position: Bomb Mexico And Take Their Oil

After enduring criticism for a lack of depth in foreign policy knowledge, Donald Trump has released a plan to bomb Mexico and seize their oil production facilities. Trump spoke tuesday with CNN's Anderson Cooper about the details. "I'm going t...
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Funny story: Donald Trump to Buy Rights to the Element Barium and Rename it Trumpium

Donald Trump to Buy Rights to the Element Barium and Rename it Trumpium

Science Town, USA Scientists were shocked to hear that long-time element Barium was to be renamed Trumpium. "I didn't even know you could buy the rights to an element and rename it!" spoke one prominent scientist. "It's going to be hard to get use...
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Funny story: Trump, the new terrorist

Trump, the new terrorist

Listen up ISIS. There is a bigger threat these days nearer to home (the USA). While the ISIS operates in the Middle East and has only spouted threats for actual terrorism in mainland USA, there is a regime shaping up that is more terrifying than ISIS...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Sues Chinese Toilet Manufacturer For Trademark Violation

Donald Trump Sues Chinese Toilet Manufacturer For Trademark Violation

A toilet manufacturer in China goes by the name of Shenzhen Trump Industrial Co. Ltd. and claims it never heard of Donald Trump till 2015 when Trump became a US presidential candidate. Now the Chinese firm is facing a lawsuit, though legal experts...
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Funny story: Ahead Of 2016 RNC Trump Trademarks "Trump Supporters Riot™"

Ahead Of 2016 RNC Trump Trademarks "Trump Supporters Riot™"

In a shrewd business move Donald Trump has applied for trademark status for the three word phrase "Trump Supporters Riot™." Now, whenever a newspaper or website uses the phrase Trump supporters riot™, the "™" symbol must appear and...
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Breaking News...

Kim Jong-Un Demands Katy Perry Join His Pleasure Squad

Kim says that the US will be sorry if his orders aren't met. He will consider Taylor Swift instead.
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