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ACTION take action on disability

ACTION, Canberra's bus service, has taken on board the ACT Government's policy recommendation that more opportunities for employment be made available to disabled people. "They will be given special training to compensate for their disabilities, to s...

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Conjoined Twins Come Clean

Funny story: Conjoined Twins Come Clean

Fort Wayne, IN: Mindi and Bindy rose to fame 5 years ago after the biography and accompanying documentary (Eye to Eye; The Only Way to See It) gave hope to millions of able bodied people who realized how much worse their lives could be. In the expose...

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Iain Duncan Smith says that anyone healthy enough to claim benefits doesn't need benefits

Secretary of State for Work and Pensions Iain Duncan Smith has outlined a new philosophy on benefit claimants while talking to the BBC, suggesting that anyone well enough to claim benefits probably doesn't need them. Speaking of people with mental...

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Offensive UKIP/Labour Joint Disability Statement: No-One Responsible

Talks have been held between a (still somewhat) cocky UKIP and a (more and more by the hour) desperate Labour Party, with a view to constructing a possible future coalition. Hopes were originally high, with optimistic and even downright ecstatica...

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London Mayor Boris 'The Blade' Johnson admits 'HS2 is not fit for purpose'.

Funny story: London Mayor Boris 'The Blade' Johnson admits 'HS2 is not fit for purpose'.

In a statement made today from City Hall, London Mayor, Boris 'The Blade' Johnson made assurances to the 9million disabled people living in London, that they would get equal access to train stations and buses, without any steps getting in the way, ''...

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Atos insist Stephen Hawking is not disabled

Funny story: Atos insist Stephen Hawking is not disabled

Atos, the French organisation employed by the British government to see which British people are eligible for disability benefits, have decided that Stephen Hawking is not disabled, and is not allowed any benefits, despite the seventy-one year old ph...

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Atos canonised by the Catholic Church

Funny story: Atos canonised by the Catholic Church

Atos, the French company that has been charged by the Department for Work And Pensions to determine the disability payments for the people of the UK will be canonised by the Catholic church after a criticism from leader of the opposition, Ed Milliban...

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Tory's new 'ducking-stool' disability assessment launched

George Osborne has announced the governments new method of assessing claimant's disability, known as the 'ducking-stool'. The contract, worth £134 trillion, is expected to be awarded to Cameron, Osbourne & Cronies Consultants. "For far too lon...

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Julie Goodyear shocking disability revealed

Funny story: Julie Goodyear shocking disability revealed

Julie Goodyear former soap icon of Coronation Street Bet Lynch, who has recently completed a three week stint in Celebrity Big Brother, has now confirmed the disability that she was said to be suffering with in the house. It has been reported to have...

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Disability ramp installed for the Miss World finals

Funny story: Disability ramp installed for the Miss World finals

Miss World, the politically incorrect contest for denigrating women, has made a step towards political correctness by installing a disability ramp. "This isn't the first time we've made a nod towards political correctness," said contest organiser,...

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Disability pay gap may take millenia to close

Funny story: Disability pay gap may take millenia to close

The Royal Equality Team for the Assessment of the Rights of the Disabled (RETARD) have released a report indicating that the pay gap between disabled people and able-bodied people is wider than ever. The report describes shocking statistics such a...

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Nasty Party

Funny story: Nasty Party

Conservative MP Philip Davies has suggested disabled people should offer to be paid less than the minimum wage in order to give them a chance of getting jobs which would otherwise go to able bodied people. A sliding scale of disabilities has been...

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Brokeback wheelchair

Funny story: Brokeback wheelchair

Famous liberal director Jalbert Smitt is due to release his latest masterpiece - a cowboy film with a twist. It aims to shed light on untold story of the disabled cowboys who lived in the Wild West. "The Good, The Bad and The Handicapped" features...

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Most Benefit Claimants Fit To Work

Funny story: Most Benefit Claimants Fit To Work

The Coalition Government has claimed that three quarters of people who claimed sickness benefit were fit to work. Ian Duncan Smith, Secretary of State for Work and Pensions, claimed that "anyone who is fit enough to make their way to the local job...

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'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

Funny story: 'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

The world of athletics is in turmoil as legless athlete, Oscar Pistorius runs what could be an Olympic qualification time. The debate goes on as to whether or not he should or shouldn't be allowed to enter alongside 'able-bodied' athletes, bearing in...

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Flatulence "Not A Disability", Tribunal Rules

Funny story: Flatulence "Not A Disability", Tribunal Rules

The Peckham Employment Tribunal has unanimously ruled that chronic flatulence is not a disability under the Disability Discrimination Act 1995. The judgement was a disappointment for Ayama McTrumpitt (27), who claimed she had been unfairly treated...

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Medical community deems left-handers to be 'disabled'

Funny story: Medical community deems left-handers to be 'disabled'

The American Medical Association has officially deemed left-handedness the newest disability in the US. In spite of their best efforts to be accepted, lefties are being lumped in with sex addicts and lupus sufferers in a category called 'mockable han...

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Blind People Given Clear Signal

Funny story: Blind People Given Clear Signal

The government today gave blind people a clear signal. The level of disability allowance that blind people received would now be the same as those who could not walk. This is because blind people walk into everything and take as long to get about as...

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Breaking news…

Wallis Simpson And Meghan Markle

Somewhere in heaven, Wallis Simpson is smiling and applauding Meghan Markle’s wedding to Prince Harry: an American, an actress and a divorcee. Wow! Everything else is just sparkle. Smart guy, Harry.
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