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Funny story:  London Mayor Boris 'The Blade' Johnson admits 'HS2 is not fit for purpose'.

London Mayor Boris 'The Blade' Johnson admits 'HS2 is not fit for purpose'.

In a statement made today from City Hall, London Mayor, Boris 'The Blade' Johnson made assurances to the 9million disabled people living in London, that they would get equal access to train stations and buses, without any steps getting in the way, ''...
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Funny story:  Atos insist Stephen Hawking is not disabled

Atos insist Stephen Hawking is not disabled

Atos, the French organisation employed by the British government to see which British people are eligible for disability benefits, have decided that Stephen Hawking is not disabled, and is not allowed any benefits, despite the seventy-one year old ph...
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Funny story:  Atos canonised by the Catholic Church

Atos canonised by the Catholic Church

Atos, the French company that has been charged by the Department for Work And Pensions to determine the disability payments for the people of the UK will be canonised by the Catholic church after a criticism from leader of the opposition, Ed Milliban...
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Funny story:  Tory's new 'ducking-stool' disability assessment launched

Tory's new 'ducking-stool' disability assessment launched

George Osborne has announced the governments new method of assessing claimant's disability, known as the 'ducking-stool'. The contract, worth £134 trillion, is expected to be awarded to Cameron, Osbourne & Cronies Consultants. "For far too lon...
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Funny story:  Julie Goodyear shocking disability revealed

Julie Goodyear shocking disability revealed

Julie Goodyear former soap icon of Coronation Street Bet Lynch, who has recently completed a three week stint in Celebrity Big Brother, has now confirmed the disability that she was said to be suffering with in the house. It has been reported to have...
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Funny story:  Disability ramp installed for the Miss World finals

Disability ramp installed for the Miss World finals

Miss World, the politically incorrect contest for denigrating women, has made a step towards political correctness by installing a disability ramp. "This isn't the first time we've made a nod towards political correctness," said contest organiser,...
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Funny story:  Disability pay gap may take millenia to close

Disability pay gap may take millenia to close

The Royal Equality Team for the Assessment of the Rights of the Disabled (RETARD) have released a report indicating that the pay gap between disabled people and able-bodied people is wider than ever. The report describes shocking statistics such a...
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Funny story:  Nasty Party

Nasty Party

Conservative MP Philip Davies has suggested disabled people should offer to be paid less than the minimum wage in order to give them a chance of getting jobs which would otherwise go to able bodied people. A sliding scale of disabilities has been...
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Funny story:  Brokeback wheelchair

Brokeback wheelchair

Famous liberal director Jalbert Smitt is due to release his latest masterpiece - a cowboy film with a twist. It aims to shed light on untold story of the disabled cowboys who lived in the Wild West. "The Good, The Bad and The Handicapped" features...
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Funny story:  Most Benefit Claimants Fit To Work

Most Benefit Claimants Fit To Work

The Coalition Government has claimed that three quarters of people who claimed sickness benefit were fit to work. Ian Duncan Smith, Secretary of State for Work and Pensions, claimed that "anyone who is fit enough to make their way to the local job...
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Funny story:  'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

The world of athletics is in turmoil as legless athlete, Oscar Pistorius runs what could be an Olympic qualification time. The debate goes on as to whether or not he should or shouldn't be allowed to enter alongside 'able-bodied' athletes, bearing in...
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Funny story:  Flatulence "Not A Disability", Tribunal Rules

Flatulence "Not A Disability", Tribunal Rules

The Peckham Employment Tribunal has unanimously ruled that chronic flatulence is not a disability under the Disability Discrimination Act 1995. The judgement was a disappointment for Ayama McTrumpitt (27), who claimed she had been unfairly treated...
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Funny story:  Medical community deems left-handers to be 'disabled'

Medical community deems left-handers to be 'disabled'

The American Medical Association has officially deemed left-handedness the newest disability in the US. In spite of their best efforts to be accepted, lefties are being lumped in with sex addicts and lupus sufferers in a category called 'mockable han...
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Funny story:  Blind People Given Clear Signal

Blind People Given Clear Signal

The government today gave blind people a clear signal. The level of disability allowance that blind people received would now be the same as those who could not walk. This is because blind people walk into everything and take as long to get about as...
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Funny story:  Scientists Identify New Disability

Scientists Identify New Disability

Scientists and Medical Doctors have identified a new disability that was formerly considered another form of laziness. This is good news for an estimated 250,000 people in the world that suffer from this syndrome. "Microwave Programmers Disabilit...
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Funny story:  Paralympics Chaos: Witnesses Sought After Horrific Pile-up

Paralympics Chaos: Witnesses Sought After Horrific Pile-up

There was chaos at the Beijing Paralympics yesterday, when, during the 5000m wheelchair extravaganza, several chariots collided with each other and other vehicles, causing a pile-up of gargantuan proportions. Edith Hunkeler, of Switzerland, caused...
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Funny story:  Oscar Pistorius Branded Health & Safety Risk By IAAF Knob

Oscar Pistorius Branded Health & Safety Risk By IAAF Knob

Oscar Pistorius, the double-amputee South African athlete should not be allowed to run in the 4X400m Olympic Relay in Beijing, as he is a Health & Safety risk, and could scythe the legs off other runners, says a lead...
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Funny story:  Big Brother Michael To Use Disability Discrimination Act 1995 To Sue Channel 4 After Wedding Shenanigans

Big Brother Michael To Use Disability Discrimination Act 1995 To Sue Channel 4 After Wedding Shenanigans

Big Brother ran into more trouble this morning, when Blind Michael announced he would sue the station over the fake wedding of Mario and Stephanie, and the way he was 'kept in the dark' about...
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Breaking News...

National Institute of Abhorrent Behavior (NIAB) to Study Cable News Anchors

Boston-Dr. Felix Noodlesorter of NAIB received a LooneyToonery grant to study the behavioral traits of those who anchor cable news shows. Prime subject for scrutiny is Wacky Chris Matthews of MSNBC,

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