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Derek Acorah arrested while driving under the influence

Funny story: Derek Acorah arrested while driving under the influence

Derek Acorah, the world's most famous grey haired psychic has been arrested for suspicion of driving whilst under the influence, something that he has embraced. "Derek has stated to the police that he was under the influence of spirits whilst driv...

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Derek Acorah arrested as part of operation Yo-Yo

Funny story: Derek Acorah arrested as part of operation Yo-Yo

Operation Yo-Yo, the second phase of the police's inspection of famous people's previous indiscretions has uncovered two previous indiscretions by world famous psychic and generally well groomed Scouser, Derek Acorah. "We have discovered that duri...

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Ghost Of Margaret Thatcher Seen Again At 10, Downing Street!

Funny story: Ghost Of Margaret Thatcher Seen Again At 10, Downing Street!

The ghost of Margaret Thatcher has again been reported seen at 10, Downing Street, this time by Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg. A terrified Mr Clegg, who managed to escape into the street through a ground floor office window after being confronted...

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Letters To The Editor From Famous Opium Addicts

Funny story: Letters To The Editor From Famous Opium Addicts

Last week, we asked for celebrity opiate users to drop us a line and tell us about the highs and the lows of their addiction. Unfortunately, all the famous opium users are now dead. Fortunately, Derek Acorah popped into the Spoof offices and was able to contact famous opium users from across the centuries. There was a downside to this, as Derek Acorah popped into the Spoof offices this we...

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Derek Acorah attacked by Rod Hulls spirit in midnight séance

Funny story: Derek Acorah attacked by Rod Hulls spirit in midnight séance

Derek Acorah was recovering in hospital last night after being ferociously attacked during an attempt to contact the late and slightly eccentric children's entertainer Rod Hull. Derek was admitted into Hospital around 1:00am suffering from multiple b...

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Derek Acorah solves Worrall Thompson shop lifting mystery

Antony Worrall Thompson has sought the aid of the maestro and undisputed king of the dead Derek Acorah it was disclosed yesterday as part of his defence in the recent shop lifting debacle. Derek, renowned for his skill in communicating with the d...

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Barber finds mark of the beast whilst giving Derek Acorah short back and sides

Italian hairdresser and devout Roman Catholic Luigi Carbonara has been in hiding for the last 10 years after discovering the mark of the beast on Derek Acorah's bonce whilst giving the self proclaimed miracle god a short back and sides at his former...

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Derek Acorah inspires 3 legged horse to win group 1 race

Too Good To Be Glue is enjoying a new lease of life after being nursed back to fitness by the awe inspiring Derek Acorah. The ex Martin Pipe horse was involved in freak accident last August where he fell out the back of a horses box trailer and was...

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Acorah sets new mastermind record by correctly answering 107 questions in 90 seconds

Derek Acorah has once again re-written the history books by correctly answering 107 questions in 90 seconds surpassing the existing record by 84 which was previously held by Eric Beagle the singing dustman. Taking a 1st round lead of 49 into his...

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Derek Acorah to cameo on Coronation Street

Funny story: Derek Acorah to cameo on Coronation Street

World-famous superstar celebrity psychic, Derek Acorah, has been asked to appear in an episode of Coronation Street playing a world-famous superstar celebrity psychic called Eric D'Accora. "Derek is very excited," said Acorah's agent, Eric D'Accor...

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Derek Acorah to protect UK borders by raising army of the dead

British defences were bolstered this morning by the news that Derek Acorah the worlds number one psychic and peoples champion, has agreed to raise an army from the dead should our shores come under threat from an opposing nation. Derek said "Prote...

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Derek suspended from 2012 Olympic Games

Derek Acoras dream of representing GB at this years Olympic Games hit a stumbling block yesterday as he was banned with immediate effect from all competitions. An inquiry will be now be launched into how the 61 year old was able to smash Mike Pow...

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Amy Winehouse 'ghost' spooked by appearance of Pete Doherty, says Derek Acorah

A ghost, purportedly that of recently deceased songstress Amy Winehouse, was spooked into vanishing back into the afterlife after apparently catching a glimpse of former Libertine's front man, Pete Doherty, according to celebrity TV medium Derek Acor...

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Derek Acorah opens a carpet and laminate shop

Funny story: Derek Acorah opens a carpet and laminate shop

Derek Acorah, the world's most attractive, charismatic and psychic man is to broaden his portfolio with the addition of a carpet and laminate company. "The chain of stores will be opening in the next couple of weeks," said new CEO Adele Willring.

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Derren Brown tricks his way to the 140th Open Championship

Funny story: Derren Brown tricks his way to the 140th Open Championship

Master illusionist Derren Brown has used his psychological tricks to win the 140th Golf Open Championship in Sandwich's Royal St George course. Despite never playing a stroke, he was declared the winner as being seven under par for the course, beatin...

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Derek Acorah to run for Prime Minister

Funny story: Derek Acorah to run for Prime Minister

Derek Acorah, the world famous psychic, and only real conduit between the living and dead that has silver hair, has announced that he is to run for Prime Minister. "The ghost of Michael Foot came to Derek," said Acorah's close friend and adviser,...

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Derek Acorah to appear on Deal or No Deal

Funny story: Derek Acorah to appear on Deal or No Deal

Derek Acorah, the Jedi Master of Psychics is to appear alongside Mystic Meg, Joe Power, Colin Fry, Belinda Bentley and several other celebrity psychics in a special one-off edition of the tedious probabilities show, Deal or No Deal. "This is going...

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Derek Acorah pictured wearing odd socks

Funny story: Derek Acorah pictured wearing odd socks

Magnificent Liverpudlian Psychic with the distinguished (and full bodied) head of hair, Derek Acorah, was pictured leaving his home in Southport today wearing odd socks. Acorah's aide, Eric D'Accord, laughed off the whole incident. "Derek is tr...

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