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Funny story: "Star Trek Style Transporter" To Randomly Beam Police Constables Around London

"Star Trek Style Transporter" To Randomly Beam Police Constables Around London

The Metropolitan Police are to use cutting edge technology to beam officers randomly around London. Special filters have been fitted to prevent officers being beamed into ladies' bathrooms and Buckingham Palace. The officers will not know where t...
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Funny story: Police now searching random 70's pop singers houses in hope to find evidence of sexual offences

Police now searching random 70's pop singers houses in hope to find evidence of sexual offences

In a bold attempt to clamp down on historic sexual offences against minors or women, the London Metropolitan Police have decided to randomly searched all homes of pop singers and TV presenters from the 1970's, with the aim of finding some evidence of...
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Funny story: Woman chains her menstrual cycle to a lamp post. It is stolen anyway.

Woman chains her menstrual cycle to a lamp post. It is stolen anyway.

A young woman in London is distraught today after discovering that her menstrual cycle has been stolen. Lillet Adams had chained the cycle to a lamp post while she went in to Boots to buy some urgent supplies, but came out to find a thief had made of...
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Funny story: Cop this!

Cop this!

In a last ditch attempt to totally wipe out Police credibility in the UK Scotland Yard is set to hire recruits with criminal convictions in a new drive to put 5,000 extra crooks on the street. Not any old crooks, but a large percentage of ethnic croo...
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Funny story: New Robot Dog To Fight New League Of Crime

New Robot Dog To Fight New League Of Crime

Mexico's criminal underworld has taken a dark turn with the rise of new criminals known as, 'super cyber scientific secret base bad guys.' The fight against crime called for an out of towner. An unknown police man who believes his dog is a robot.
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Funny story: Picking The Good Chunks Out Of Ice Cream To Be Reclassified As Felony

Picking The Good Chunks Out Of Ice Cream To Be Reclassified As Felony

Washington D.C. - The criminal act of probing through a carton of ice cream to find and eat the good chunky pieces will become a felony on January 1, 2015. The crime is currently classified as a misdemeanor. While the change covers every flavor a...
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Funny story: Man Loses Hands

Man Loses Hands

Peter has lost his hands and needs help finding them! He has offered some thing or another for the return of the hands but we don't know for sure because the reward notice he's been sticking to lampposts with his head are completely indecipherable. T...
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Funny story: Santa Barbara Killer's Motive Baffles Eggheads, Know-It-All Professors

Santa Barbara Killer's Motive Baffles Eggheads, Know-It-All Professors

Santa Barbara, CA - As the country tries to make sense of the recent tragedy in California, the nation's elite are always quick to point out the answers to those of us who aren't nearly as smart as they are. Elliott Rodger killed six people la...
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Funny story: Isla Vista shooter accumulates points toward l'enfant horrible trophy

Isla Vista shooter accumulates points toward l'enfant horrible trophy

This weekend's attack in Isla Vista is now being seen as akin to the Adam Lanza massacre in Newtown, Connecticut, which cost the lives of twenty children and six of their adult protectors. The Isla Vista murderer, Elliott Rodger, has a count of si...
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Funny story: California Considers Move to Ban 'Blonde Sluts' After Man Goes on Rampage Because He Never Got Any

California Considers Move to Ban 'Blonde Sluts' After Man Goes on Rampage Because He Never Got Any

Isla Vista, CA - A delusional, 22 year-old man went on a premeditated killing spree Friday night in an attempt to get "retribution", as he stated it, for the slight he felt humanity had given him. His hatred focused on one creature in particular:...
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Funny story: Steubenville Prepares To Purge; Pull Up Drawbridges, Set Force Fields

Steubenville Prepares To Purge; Pull Up Drawbridges, Set Force Fields

SORRY 911 IS OUT OF SERVICE AGAIN, STEUBENVILLE, OHIO -- City council is discussing plans to initiate a monthly purge in which citywide crime of all sorts would be legal from 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. the last day of each month. "Probably wouldn't notice...
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Funny story: Crime rate drop inexplicable

Crime rate drop inexplicable

This year has seen an astonishing 15% drop in the crime rate in England and Wales, leaving it at its lowest rate since records began. Prime Minister David Cameron welcomed the news, and to much surprise he claimed personal responsibility for the drop...
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Funny story: Crystal County Sheriff Disputes Allegation of Probable Failure - Suspect In Custody

Crystal County Sheriff Disputes Allegation of Probable Failure - Suspect In Custody

Crystal Cove, Ohio - Crystal County Sheriff Tom Jones held a press conference this morning to dispute an implication that his department would never have stopped local criminal activity, and that an outside criminal investigative organization was req...
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Funny story: Blindness Could Lead To Not Being Able To See Things

Blindness Could Lead To Not Being Able To See Things

Although yet to be confirmed by independent scientific corroboration, a research group from Chadswhipple Crosshire Down By The Lake Rockshire University, outside London, has asserted that blindness could have a definite connection to someone not bein...
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Funny story: NY man wrongfully acquitted sues state for $25M

NY man wrongfully acquitted sues state for $25M

A Brooklyn man wants a million dollars for every year the state did not lock him up in prison. Dean Dork, who spent almost a quarter-century at liberty and free after being found not guilty for a crime he committed, has hit the state with a $25 m...
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Funny story: Crime Stoppers director bites

Crime Stoppers director bites

MY AM ME, WHO YOU BE, FL -- Your identity may not be safe from the National Security Agency (NSA) or on the Obummercare web site, but it's secure with the Miami-Dade Crime Stoppers, the executive director of which recently took a bite out of crime wh...
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Funny story: Mississippi Judge Accused of Misapplying 3-Strikes Statutes

Mississippi Judge Accused of Misapplying 3-Strikes Statutes

Whitecracker, MS (Reuters) - A Caucasian judge in rural Mississippi, who is also a volunteer pee-wee baseball league umpire, has been accused of over-stepping his judicial bounds by sentencing Black and Hispanic pee-weers who have have gone down swi...
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Funny story: Strange and Unexplained Phenomena Reported by Metro Area Youth

Strange and Unexplained Phenomena Reported by Metro Area Youth

Are the dead rising from local cemeteries and terrorizing our local youth population? You could come to that conclusion after speaking with several local young people who have reported not only "ghostly" and unexplained phenomena, but a steady inc...
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Obama... Ordinary like us.

Yesterday, President Obama was refused entry into a restaurant for not wearing a tie and later fined for double parking and... ordered to return his library books... and thrown off a tram...and...

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