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Funny satire stories about Crabs

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Funny story: Dorking Crab Boat Mothballed

Dorking Crab Boat Mothballed

It's bad news from Dorking, as the town's last remaining Bering Sea crab boat has been mothballed, due to financial constraints, and being unable to compete with their Alaskan counterparts, such as those featured on Discovery Channel's 'Deadliest Cat...
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Funny story: Ryan Giggs To Sign Up For Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch?

Ryan Giggs To Sign Up For Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch?

As it emerged today, veteran Manchester United football star, Ryan Giggs has signed yet another one year extension to his contract, but many people are wondering what he will do after he decides to draw the curtain on his distinguished football caree...
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Funny story: 'Ashley Cole gave me 'Crabs' ' claims Sarah Purnell

'Ashley Cole gave me 'Crabs' ' claims Sarah Purnell

The jilted ex-girlfriend of foot-baller Ashley Cole, who was unceremoniously dumped earlier this week (see Ashley Cole dumps Sarah Purnell.....by text), has sensationally claimed that Ashley Cole left her....with 'crabs'. The 23 year-old lap dance...
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Funny story: University study of crabs danger shocks British citizens

University study of crabs danger shocks British citizens

The University of Newcastle upon Tyne released the results of a two-year study of the dangers posed to humans infested by foreign crabs coming ashore in the UK. Undocumented alien sex workers are infecting good, clean British "Johns" who then spread...
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Funny story: Deadliest Catch Ann Coulter Bagged by Discovery's Channel

Deadliest Catch Ann Coulter Bagged by Discovery's Channel

DUTCH HARBOR, AK - In a bid to dramatically increase its viewing audience, Discovery's Channel will reportedly cut narrator Mike Roe from its highly-rated series Deadliest Crabs, bagging ice queen Ann Coulter to fill his role in the frigid Bering Sea...
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Funny story: Well Street Crash! Latest!

Well Street Crash! Latest!

Just coming in - A crash occurred seconds ago in Well Street, Hackney, London E9. Incoming reports suggest that a VW Golf shunted into a Renault Kangoo. No reports as yet of any injuries. The drivers are currently exchanging insurance details. An...
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Funny story: Palin Sought Big Fed Bucks to Find Cure for Crabs!

Palin Sought Big Fed Bucks to Find Cure for Crabs!

Itchy Sarah Palin, mayor of Wasilla, Alaska which has more pubic lice than people sought large Federal grants to find a cure for the crabs. Palin told a Congressional committee charged with investigating Pthirus pubis ("crab" louse, pubic louse) that...
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Funny story: Man with problems covers his testicles with sandwich spread

Man with problems covers his testicles with sandwich spread

Recent newcomer to England, East European Pincha Knifenfork had unwelcome visitors to his nether region after a night with a woman he picked up at a dockside pub, "The Haddock and Rupture"...
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Funny story: Woman hospitalised after pubic lice removal attempt

Woman hospitalised after pubic lice removal attempt

A woman, yet to be named, is in hospital with second degree burns to her groin after attempting to rid herself from an infestation of Pthirus pubis (Pubic lice, or Crabs). The woman is believed to have used a whole can of foaming insect killer to...
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Breaking News...

Iron Man Booted Out of Avengers for Drunken Flying..Again!

Captain America and Hulk met the press to make the sad announcement that Iron Man was no longer a member of the Avengers due to his alcoholism. "He PROMISED it wouldn't happen again!" said the Hulk.

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