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Funny satire stories about Countdown

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Cameron: "Hey OAPS! I love Countdown too!"

Funny story: Cameron: "Hey OAPS! I love Countdown too!"

David Cameron is to publicly state how much he enjoys Countdown, his slippers and a good ol' cuppa tea, to try and garner more votes from people who probably won't be around for the next general election. Cameron is on his second week of shameless...

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Carol Vorderman Reveals The Truth About Why Piers Morgan Reduced Her To Tears In TV Show

Funny story: Carol Vorderman Reveals The Truth About Why Piers Morgan Reduced Her To Tears In TV Show

Former Countdown maths whizz, and student 'older lady' wank fantasy, Carol Vorderman - arse of the year winner on several occasions, and oft regarded as 'Thinking Man's Crumpet' - today revealed the real reason about why she was reduced to tears on P...

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'Carol Vorderman - Fit As A Butcher's Dog At Fifty!' Reports The Daily Mail

Funny story: 'Carol Vorderman - Fit As A Butcher's Dog At Fifty!' Reports The Daily Mail

Upmarket British tabloid, The Daily Mail, has recently reported that former Countdown maths whizz, Carol Vorderman, is still as fit as a butcher's dog at fifty, and ran a series of pictures on its website to prove it. Unfortunately, none of them f...

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Countdown's Rachel Riley Crowned The New 'Thinking Man's Crumpet'

Funny story: Countdown's Rachel Riley Crowned The New 'Thinking Man's Crumpet'

Countdown maths wizard, Oxford graduate, Rachel Riley, 25 who replaced the iconic 'Rear Of The Year' Carol Vorderman on the words and numbers show, has been crowned the new 'Thinking Man's Crumpet.' Rachel has been wowing the tea time crowds with...

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Carol Vorderman Still Good With Figures

Funny story: Carol Vorderman Still Good With Figures

She made her name on Channel 4's Countdown game show as the girl with a brain like a pocket calculator, as she almost invariably solved countless numbers game problems which left the majority scratching their heads in awe. Carol has since left the...

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Channel 4's Countdown In A Tizz Over Rising Hemlines

Funny story: Channel 4's Countdown In A Tizz Over Rising Hemlines

TV watchdogs are today putting their foot down with a heavy hand and bringing to book Channel 4's daily word quiz, Countdown. It seems that the bird who puts the letters and numbers on the board, Rachel Riley, is causing coronaries throughout the lan...

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HM the Queen congratulates Countdown on the 5,000th show

Funny story: HM the Queen congratulates Countdown on the 5,000th show

Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, has said thank you to Countdown, the CH4 game show that tests contestants arithmetic and word making skills. HRH loves to play against her Private Secretaries. She has the show recorded each afternoon and watches i...

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Burnley Footballer Wins Countdown

Funny story: Burnley Footballer Wins Countdown

Footballers aren't usually too well known for their intellectual prowess, but there is always an exception to the rule, and Burnley FC defender Clarke Carlisle is one of those exceptions. An outstanding one! Yesterday, Clarke Carlisle won his seco...

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Much Wringing Of Hands And Many Tears As Carol Vorderman And Countdown Part Company

Funny story: Much Wringing Of Hands And Many Tears As Carol Vorderman And Countdown Part Company

'It's the end of an era,' bemoaned a Geordie today as Carol Vorderman made her final appearance on words and numbers TV gameshow, Countdown. 'She's been treated so shabbily by C4, I'm sorry, It's so emotional.' In scenes reminiscent of the Wailing...

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Carol Vaudeville Off Countabout's Pneumatic Tits Upset Students And Geeks

Funny story: Carol Vaudeville Off Countabout's Pneumatic Tits Upset Students And Geeks

That good old British televisual staple for the benefit of the reasonably intelligent unemployed of the UK, or their similarly unemployed student counterparts was lambasted yesterday by the very people who have supported the show since the early Eigh...

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Carol Vorderman Sacked for Cheating?

Funny story: Carol Vorderman Sacked for Cheating?

Consonant, Y... Vowel, O... Consonant, Y... Vowel, O... Consonant, Y... Vowel, O...Consonant, Y... Vowel, O... Consonant, Y. That's...YOYOYOYOY. A good question; why oh why did Carol Vorderman decide to leave channel 4's long-running quiz show, count...

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Countdown Conundrum

Funny story: Countdown Conundrum

Auditions are now underway for a replacement for Carol Vorderman, erstwhile presenter of Student favourite, Countdown. The shortlist is now of actress and the voice of Penny Crayon, Su Pollard, star of 'Most Probably not actually haunted' Yvette F...

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Glitter Named New Host of Countdown

Funny story: Glitter Named New Host of Countdown

Sources have claimed that convicted paedophile Gary Glitter, who looked like he was a bit iffy throughout the 70's but you couldn't quite pinpoint why, is to take over from frail crooner Des O'Connor as host of the cult words and numbers quiz Countdo...

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Vorderman Was Axed Over Tax Credits Row

Funny story: Vorderman Was Axed Over Tax Credits Row

Just weeks after surgically enhanced mathmatician, Carol Vorderman was removed from the Countdown Studios by security guards it has emerged that the olive-skinned beauty, whose weight regularly fluctuates between 8 and 15 stone, has become yet anoth...

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Channel 4 replace Carol Vorderman with Jade Goody

Funny story: Channel 4 replace Carol Vorderman with Jade Goody

The next series of Countdown will see the long-awaited return of Jade Goody to our TV screens. She will be replacing the current presenter Carol Vorderman who was sensationally sacked last month for...

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Vorderman plays Argentine "numbers game"

Funny story: Vorderman plays Argentine "numbers game"

Argentine finance minister Fernando Hernandez has today revealed their mystery financial saviour to be Carol Vorderman, host of Channel 4 hit show "Countdown"...

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Carol Vorderman Doesn't Throw Her Clothes Away Very Often

Funny story: Carol Vorderman Doesn't Throw Her Clothes Away Very Often

Carol Vorderman, the 'letters girl' from the crap TV game show Countdown, made history yesterday when, for the 25th Anniversary of the show, she wore the same pair of brown suedette trousers...

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Carol's Number Could Be Up

Funny story: Carol's Number Could Be Up

Brainy bird, Carol Vorderman, is today rumoured to be taking her maths A Level in an attempt to scotch the story, going round like wild-fire on the internet, saying that she uses times tables off-camera to work out the numbers problems on Countdown.

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Breaking news…

Wallis Simpson And Meghan Markle

Somewhere in heaven, Wallis Simpson is smiling and applauding Meghan Markle’s wedding to Prince Harry: an American, an actress and a divorcee. Wow! Everything else is just sparkle. Smart guy, Harry.
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