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Funny story: Monty Signs Up For Gardeners World

Monty Signs Up For Gardeners World

Former Ryder Cup captain Colin Montgomerie has been unveiled as the new frontman for the flagship BBC programme, Gardeners World. Monty is taking over from former presenter Toby Buckland, whose 2 year stint ended when he walked out in protest at t...
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Funny story: Monty Loses It Again

Monty Loses It Again

Colin Montgomerie is back in the bad books after a foul mouthed outburst in the second round of the San Marino Open. Monty was furious at three putting the eighteenth hole, blaming his lapse on loud music coming from one of the nearby hospitality...
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Funny story: Long-Life Drug scandal as pensioners run riot at The Open

Long-Life Drug scandal as pensioners run riot at The Open

Turnberry: Watson, Jimenez, Montgomerie & Lyle banned at The Open over new life prolonging drug Rapamycin found in system after routine drug tests. Following the sizzling form of veterans Miguel Angel Jimenez and Tom Watson who are leading the...
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Funny story: Colin Montgomerie To Become Fattest Europe Ryder Cup Captain

Colin Montgomerie To Become Fattest Europe Ryder Cup Captain

Colin Montgomerie, the portly 51-year-old Scot, has won the fight to become the European Ryder Cup captain for the championship to be staged in Wales in 2010, and will be the fattest man ever to do so. He is even fatter than Ian Woosnam! Monty,...
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Funny story: 2008 Ryder Cup Captain Nick Faldo Is Crap In Bed, Claims Ex-wife

2008 Ryder Cup Captain Nick Faldo Is Crap In Bed, Claims Ex-wife

Nick Faldo, the European Ryder Cup captain, may have more on his plate than the US team this weekend at Valhalla, with one of his ex-wives Valerie Bercher claiming that "Nick is crap in bed". Europe's Odin is in Valhalla with the team to try to re...
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Funny story: USA Ryder Cup captain picks Monty as wildcard

USA Ryder Cup captain picks Monty as wildcard

In a shock twist today, USA Ryder Cup Captain Paul Azinger picked Colin Montgomerie as a wild card for the USA team, after J.B Holmes pulled out because of toothache. Following his omission from the European wild card picks, Azinger revealed that...
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Funny story: Home Of Golf Raided By Coppers

Home Of Golf Raided By Coppers

St Andrews, the spiritual Home of Golf, was last night raided by City of London police, in an ongoing investigation into "corruption in golf".
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Funny story: Monty To Concentrate On Second Place

Monty To Concentrate On Second Place

Golfer Colin Montgomerie is almost ready to believe he will never, ever, EVER win a major title.
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Chris Christi Licks Sickness

As a result of an intensive three-year psychological reconditioning program under the supervision of Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee, Chris Christi is almost completely cured of his homosexual disease
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