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Funny satire stories about Cocaine

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It's Ok To Have Cocaine on Coca-Drink Property

Cocaine with a street value of up to $42 million was discovered at a Coca-Drink factory in Macon, GA. The Coca-Drink factory in Macon produces concentrates for various drinks. Workers opened a shipment of bottled orange juice concentrate but fou...

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Lordy! Lordy! Sniffy Baron Sewel Resigns

Funny story: Lordy! Lordy! Sniffy Baron Sewel Resigns

Labour peer Baron Sewel, of Gilcomstoun in the District of the City of Aberdeen, has resigned from the House of Lords after footage of him allegedly snorting cocaine and entertaining prostitutes, while definitely wearing a fetching bra and leather ja...

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The party's over for Scots Gnats as coast guards seize $750m of incoming cocaine

Funny story: The party's over for Scots Gnats as coast guards seize $750m of incoming cocaine

Aberdeen, Scotland - A tip-off from anonymous foreign intelligence sauces has seen the seizure of three tons of Colombian cocaine bound for the euphoric Scottish general election market. The bust is the biggest in local living memory and leaves th...

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SCANDAL!- Many Republicans Found To Be Hooked On Koch!

Funny story: SCANDAL!- Many Republicans Found To Be Hooked On Koch!

A shocking report has reached news desks throughout the country that many Republicans, especially those in great positions of responsibility, are hooked on Koch. Koch, which first made it appearance in the 40's, has become more virulent in recent...

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Charles trip to broker cheap Colombian cocaine deal

Funny story: Charles trip to broker cheap Colombian cocaine deal

Bogota - Prince Charles has begun a weed-long visit to the global epicenter of cocaine dealing following an official invitation from Colombia. Accompanied by crystal meth-peddling bigamist accomplice Camilla the royal Pretender arrived in Bogota i...

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Arrested 'cocaine sandwich' guy claimed it was just 'American frosting'

Funny story: Arrested 'cocaine sandwich' guy claimed it was just 'American frosting'

Benidorm, Spain - A Colombian national arrested in possession of a $10 'footlong' narcotic ham 'n' cheese club sandwich claimed the powdery white topping was nothing more sinister than yummy American frosting made from savory meringue and a macrobio...

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Amazing what a couple of grams of coke can do as Pope Joe Ratzinger wheeled out of cryogenic stasis

Funny story: Amazing what a couple of grams of coke can do as Pope Joe Ratzinger wheeled out of cryogenic stasis

Vatican Shitty, Rome - Half a dozen toots up each nostril and the Deserter Pope Joseph Ratzinger made it to today's canonisation double act a newly envigorated man. The 87 year-old former Nazi appeared in full Pontifical bling after a year's abse...

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Nigella Turned Back at Airport - but Visa then granted America's Purity and Morality Saved Just in Time

A legitimate online flight booking to L. A. by F.B.I's most wanted T.V. cook Nigella Lawson was used to alert Captain America yesterday. The Superhero swooped down to confront and humiliate the highly lethal English Lady. With nothing better to...

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Airport Security Finds 30 Pounds of Cocaine Under Fat Lady's Boobs!

Funny story: Airport Security Finds 30 Pounds of Cocaine Under Fat Lady's Boobs!

While this might not be a drug mule case, security guards at Kennedy Airport say it was more like a cow-smuggling incident. An as yet unknown 300-pound woman was routinely being searched at the airport when a bag of cocaine fell out on the floor.

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Secret Documents Reveal That Vladimir Putin Had Made Plans To Invade Colombia

Funny story: Secret Documents Reveal That Vladimir Putin Had Made Plans To Invade Colombia

MOSCOW - An unidentified source with strong ties to upper Russian officials has revealed that he saw top secret documents concerning Russia's plan to invade the South American country of Colombia. The plans showed a date for the invasion to be som...

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Why it's getting harder to back a winner

Funny story: Why it's getting harder to back a winner

Aintree ought to be buzzing with anticipation of todays Grand National, but instead there are disturbing claims that many of the entrants are hooked on recreational drugs. And we don't mean the jockeys, we mean the HORSES! Rumours of horses takin...

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Is Lindsay Lohan "Betty" At The Salon?

Funny story: Is Lindsay Lohan "Betty" At The Salon?

Lindsay Lohan has been missing for a couple of weeks -not even in court -so some friends and fans have been concerned. However, a recent article with a photo of some girl named "Betty" has them believing she has either lost her memory or just wants a...

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Peru drug mule stooges 'home for Christmas 2033'

Funny story: Peru drug mule stooges 'home for Christmas 2033'

Lima - Two daft Brit cows caught with one-and-a-half kilos of Colombian cocaine have changed their pitch and admitted trafficking following a Peruvian Justice Ministry plea bargain sweetener. This offers a reduced terms sentence in exchange for gr...

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Cook County crack addict resigns from bench

ST. ECLAIR, ILL - Michael Cook, who was caught, white-handed, cooking up smack (or maybe it was coke; details are confused in what remains of his mind), has resigned in disgrace from his position as a Cook County judge. A colleague died of a heroi...

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The Interesting Case Of DEA K-9 Drug Dog Agent Rover Boy

Funny story: The Interesting Case Of DEA K-9 Drug Dog Agent Rover Boy

LAREDO - The United States Drug Enforcement Agency, known as DEA, is reporting that K-9 Drug Dog Agent Rover Boy, who is regarded as one of the DEA's top drug sniffing dogs, has been entered into The Bow-Wow Dog Rehab Clinic in Baltimore. A spokes...

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Steve Gold: The Death Of A Footballing Legend

Funny story: Steve Gold: The Death Of A Footballing Legend

Controversial former Leicester City and England footballer Steve Gold has died aged 50. The legendary striker was found unconscious in his squalid Leicester flat by police after a local off-license owner became concerned for his safety. Police confirmed the news earlier today. Laura Pintage, proprietor of the 'Booze Till You Snooze' off-license told us, "Steve was a regular in the shop. S...

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Bobby Brown to arrange catering at Whitney's funeral!

Funny story: Bobby Brown to arrange catering at Whitney's funeral!

The list of celebs and VIP's has been drawn up for Whitney's funeral and it's a who's who of the pop, soul, blues world. Kevin Costner is to recite a eulogy stating how much fun it was being her bodyguard and having his ears bashed during breaks.

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President Obama Blames Tea Party For Recession: Calls Them "Tin Horn Tokers" For Not Buying Drugs

Funny story: President Obama Blames Tea Party For Recession: Calls Them "Tin Horn Tokers" For Not Buying Drugs

WASHINGTON - Just prior to boarding Air Force One this morning to join Michelle and the girls in Hawaii, President Obama poured it on conservative Tea Party activists by calling them "Tin Horn Tokers" for not buying enough marijuana and cocaine to ke...

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Breaking news…

Man Cures Cancer While Sitting In ER Waiting Room

After arriving at the hospital for a health complication a gentleman had to wait to be seen. 8 years later he's still there, but found the cure for cancer in the meantime. That was 6 years ago...
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