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Funny satire stories about Chris Christie

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Funny story: Faded NJ Republican Star Looks to Shine a Little Brighter

Faded NJ Republican Star Looks to Shine a Little Brighter

Chris Christie A Faded New Jersey Republican Star attempts to shine brighter by switching his focus. He is now campaigning for The 2016 Democratic Presidential Nomination. Christie's staff released a statement earlier today " With Hilary being th...
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Funny story: New Jersey Considers

New Jersey Considers

The state of New Jersey has been in a declining economic situation for some time. The gaming industry has fallen on hard times, jobs are still moving overseas, and the effects of storm Sandy are still being felt. Budget cuts are a large factor in...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Shits Out a Large FedEx Tracking Chip

Chris Christie Shits Out a Large FedEx Tracking Chip

Chris Christie ended up in an ER in Passaic today after tearing his asshole while shitting out a (supposedly edible) electronic FedEx human tracking device. "I ate this elephant sized electronic FedEx thing yesterday. And today, it got stuck s...
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Funny story: Chris Christie's Unceremonious Sanctimony

Chris Christie's Unceremonious Sanctimony

While hosting a luncheon for a group of wealthy donors during a campaign stop at a roadside picnic area near a posh upscale restaurant, New Jersey Governor Chris "The Sissy" Christie over-estimated the limit of his intellect and under-estimated the...
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Funny story: Two Killed, Seven Injured in the Quadrennial Running of the Republicans

Two Killed, Seven Injured in the Quadrennial Running of the Republicans

WASHINGTON, D.C.-This week in downtown Washington, two people were killed and seven injured in the quadrennial melee known as the Running of the Republicans. Rare in the Running of the Republicans, one bull was also killed when he was gored by a...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Announces Bid for President Presidentie

Chris Christie Announces Bid for President Presidentie

This week, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie announced that he will seek the Republican nomination for president presidentie in the 2016 election. Christie told a group of supporters in his hometown of Livingston, New Jersey, that he feels he has...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Announces Candidacy At A Very Sore Spot

Chris Christie Announces Candidacy At A Very Sore Spot

Livingston, NJ - On Tuesday, infamous New Jersey Governor, Chris Christie, finally announced to America that he will indeed be running for the highest office in the land - and he did it underneath the football goal that was once the site of the bigge...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Foundation Recommends Closing the income gap for fat people

Chris Christie Foundation Recommends Closing the income gap for fat people

TRENTON, NJ - The spokesman for The Chris Christie Foundation, Betha Buhderbahl, announced that the foundation will take on a troubling, weighty issue when it comes to the income gap between healthy people and the obese. Obese people make 72 cents...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Forces Plane to Land Because No Toilet Paper on Board!

Chris Christie Forces Plane to Land Because No Toilet Paper on Board!

Mona Bona, political correspondent for Sade Media, gives her take on Chris Christie's actions which forced a plane to land due to no toiler paper. Well - the man who gives new meaning to "The Bully Pulpit" has done it again! He's moved on from 'Bridgegate' to 'Toiletpapergate!' His private jet (courtesy of The koch Bros.) was en route to Iowa where Christie is now known as 'The Hog lovin Man...
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Funny story: Chris Christie refuses to shower in GOP locker room

Chris Christie refuses to shower in GOP locker room

DES MOINES, IA - It was reported today that New Jersey Governor Chris Christie refused to shower with other GOP hopefuls after the 2015 Freedom Summit hosted by Iowa Congressman Steve King. At the annual event several potential presidential candid...
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Funny story: Chris Christie Running In 2016 As Congress Votes to Classify White House Snack Budget

Chris Christie Running In 2016 As Congress Votes to Classify White House Snack Budget

TRENTON, NJ - New Jersey governor Chris Christie says he will run for the Republican nomination in the 2016 presidential election. In a news conference later today, he will endorse what he calls "a monumental piece of legislation". Governor Chr...
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Funny story: Giant Chris Christie-shaped fatberg menaces NYC drains

Giant Chris Christie-shaped fatberg menaces NYC drains

New York - A ten ton post-Thanksgiving fatberg composed of congealed turkey fat, wet wipes and human gunk is threatening to bung up New York City's sewers just in time for the festive holiday break. Emergency sanitation engineers charged with rem...
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Funny story: New products for Ebola scare proposed plus additional restrictions and theories

New products for Ebola scare proposed plus additional restrictions and theories

A new company named KRAP Inc. has stepped forward to take action in the Ebola crisis. KRAP Inc. (Kaci Risks and Preventions) maintains it is responding in the spirit of Salem in the 1690's, Senator McCarthy in the 1950's, and the anthrax scare on...
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Funny story: Why You Should Vote for Chris Christie for President

Why You Should Vote for Chris Christie for President

Okay, I like Chris Christie. The main reason I like the guy is because he's big and fat, just like me. In a land that's filled with dysfunctional dipshit politics, is that such a bad reason? Am I being too shallow? Too trite? Too outrageous? And...
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Funny story: 'Bongs Can Only Get Better' hint in Chris Christie presidential plan

'Bongs Can Only Get Better' hint in Chris Christie presidential plan

New Jersey - Smoke signals from Drumthwacket's chimney stacks have revealed Chris Christie's presidential manifesto for a federal weed tax to fill the nation's fifty trillion dollar debt sinkhole. This morning the New Jersey Governor posted a ren...
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Funny story: Doctor: Gov. Christie Healthier But Still A Bastard

Doctor: Gov. Christie Healthier But Still A Bastard

A recent medical report from the family physician of New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie indicates the healthier GOP presidential candidate is still "big boned ... really big boned" but now likely wouldn't doze off after a big meal at diplomatic functions...
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Funny story: Hysterical Woman, Not Christie Causes Bridgegate

Hysterical Woman, Not Christie Causes Bridgegate

So, as we all know, there was a huge traffic jam episode on a N.J. bridge that Governor Chris Christie's associates cooked up to embarrass the mayor in Fort Lee whose constitutants would suffer from unnecessary lane closures. That mayor had not endo...
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Funny story: Chris Christie's new kick ass lawyer a dead ringer for young Santa Claus

Chris Christie's new kick ass lawyer a dead ringer for young Santa Claus

Trenton, Knew Joyzee - "Just pop a white-trimmed red wooly hat on him and the guy's everyone's idea of Father Christmas," a NY Port Authority bridge repair guy said today, "give or take another 15-20 years." This weekend millions of East Coast TV...
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Wal-Mart Awards Health Insurance Coupons to Employees

Wal-Mart has issued coupons to their part-time employees for 10% off prescriptions and aspirin.
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