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Funny satire stories about Charlton Heston

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Funny story: Head Of NRA Shoots Self Is In Hospital

Head Of NRA Shoots Self Is In Hospital

Pastor John Slaughter today was handed the NRA gavel to preside over the most powerful pro-gun lobby in the U.S. His sudden assent to be the gun group's top man was occasioned by former CEO, Wayne La Pisse, severely wounding himself through careless...
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Funny story: Charlton Heston Returns From The Grave To Tell People To Buy "Guns, Guns, Guns" Despite the Batman Theater Shootings

Charlton Heston Returns From The Grave To Tell People To Buy "Guns, Guns, Guns" Despite the Batman Theater Shootings

The iconic movie matinee idol Charlton Heston has risen from the dead like a neo Jesus Christ to stick up for his National Rifle Association buddies after a gunman shot 70 people, killing 12 including children, at a midnight Batman movie premiere in...
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Funny story: I'm Going, Going Away, Away From Cali, Cali

I'm Going, Going Away, Away From Cali, Cali

A judge in California has come up with a novel approach to dealing with the state's overcrowded penal system. Justice Anthony Kennedy is to sign papers that will release 143,000 prisoners back on to the streets and in to the community. In a speech...
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Funny story: Soylent Green Is People

Soylent Green Is People

The ghost of Charlton Heston has uncovered a dastardly plan to feed people on human flesh. The square-jawed action man took a break from his duties impersonating God and Moses in Heaven to foil the cannibalistic scheme. "From my cold dead hands I...
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Funny story: McCain Names Running Mate

McCain Names Running Mate

In an astonishing, rambling announcement tonight, Senator John McCain shocked even some of his closest advisers when he announced his choice of running-mate: The late Charlton Heston.
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Funny story: Charlton Heston: Obituary

Charlton Heston: Obituary

The world has seen the passing of the great Charlton Heston.
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Funny story: Soylent Green star Charlton Heston dies

Soylent Green star Charlton Heston dies

Charlton Heston, beloved Oscar-winner and star of Hollywood Cinemascope epics, has died peacefully at age 84, a spokesman for his family has said.
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Funny story: Boulder, Colorado Votes to Impeach Charlton Heston, Man!

Boulder, Colorado Votes to Impeach Charlton Heston, Man!

The City Council of Boulder, CO has voted to impeach former President of the NRA Charlton Heston in a closed door session. A spokesman for the City Council, David "Waves" Piketon, said Heston, who served as the head of the NRA in the late 1...
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Funny story: Charlton Heston slams the National Rifle Association for "gun loving"

Charlton Heston slams the National Rifle Association for "gun loving"

Legendary Hollywood actor and N.R.A spokesman Charlton Heston has slammed the association for what he calls a "gun loving" attitude.
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Funny story: Charlton Heston Mocks Barry Bonds

Charlton Heston Mocks Barry Bonds

SAN FRANCISCO (Lumberg) - Actor Charlton Heston mocked Barry Bonds on Saturday, announcing that the San Francisco Giants hitter can have Hank Aaron's career home run record only by prying it "from my cold, dead hands".
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Funny story: Not good men, GodMen!

Not good men, GodMen!

FRANKLIN, TENN -- 300 men, claiming to be Christians, met at a shopping mall, of all places, to listen to a lesson that will likely ring home with the "God and guns" mob: Christianity has been "feminized," Jesus is a "wimp&qu...
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Recent poll results indicate vast majority of US citizens dumber than ever before. Cyber addicted, they flock to the latest Apple phones, seeking to redouse themselves in brain-dead video apps. Ugh!!

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