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Funny story: Spice Girls vs. Celtic Woman for World Jello Wrestling Championship

Spice Girls vs. Celtic Woman for World Jello Wrestling Championship

LONDON (ABSNN) - Fresh from their triumph at the London Olympic Games finale, the Spice Girls have decided to stay together long enough to challenge the Celtic Woman singing group for the Jello Wrestling Championship of the Western World. Fans of bo...
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Funny story: Hadrian's Wall Given £500,000 Boost

Hadrian's Wall Given £500,000 Boost

English security services and locals were celebrating today after they learned that Hadrian's Wall had secured a £500k SITA grant. The £537,185 grant has been made to help fund a project, managed by Hadrian's Wall Heritage. Said a Heritage spok...
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Funny story: Transfer Deadline Day: Liverpool sign Celtic

Transfer Deadline Day: Liverpool sign Celtic

In one of the more unexpected transfer deadline day deals Liverpool have signed the entire playing squad, coaching staff and fan base of top Scottish club Glasgow Celtic. Kenny Dalglish, Liverpool manager and also one of Celtic's most legendary pl...
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Funny story: Celtic Boss Neil Lennon Found 'Not Guilty' Of Being Assaulted

Celtic Boss Neil Lennon Found 'Not Guilty' Of Being Assaulted

Celtic manager Neil Lennon has breathed a sigh of relief after a jury returned a 'not guilty' verdict in his trial at Edinburgh Sheriff Court. Lennon had been accused of being assaulted by 26-year-old Hearts fan John Wilson, whose actions were sai...
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Funny story: John Reid Resigns As Celtic Chairman

John Reid Resigns As Celtic Chairman

Dr John Reid has confirmed that he is to end his 4 year reign as chairman of Celtic FC. The former Labour minister will be succeeded by whisky magnate and fellow lifelong Hoops fan, Ian Bankier. Confirming that he will stand down at the club's...
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Funny story: Shock as Entire Celtic team resign

Shock as Entire Celtic team resign

Manager of Stalybridge Celtic, Jim Harvey, admitted his shock when he discovered that the entire team had resigned. "I was told by a text message," Harvey said in a press conference at the club's Bower Fold ground. "Chairman Rob Gorski sent it."...
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Funny story: Lennon Defends After Match Gestures

Lennon Defends After Match Gestures

Celtic manager Neil Lennon has defended his after match gestures to the Rangers fans after the 0-0 draw this afternoon. Lennon was seen to put his hands behind his ears as he crossed the pitch in front of the Rangers faithful at the end of the las...
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Breaking News...

Plans for Bergdahl Post-CourtMartial Leaked

Another leak from the Empire Palace reveals Barack I will appoint Beau Bergdahl--after his court-martial--as His Excellency's Ambassador to the Taliban, given Bergdahls' extensive connections there.
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