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Funny satire stories about Carpets

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Sharapova Drugs Scandal: Hotel Carpet Hits Back After Slur

Funny story: Sharapova Drugs Scandal: Hotel Carpet Hits Back After Slur

The assembled press came to see one loser as Maria Sharapova admitted taking the recently banned substance Meldonium. But there was another one on show: an innocent carpet, left bruised and with its shag swept against the natural lay. As she offer...

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Plastic Covers To Be Fitted To Valuable Furniture And Carpets In Buckingham Palace As Corgi Damage Exceeds £20m

Funny story: Plastic Covers To Be Fitted To Valuable Furniture And Carpets In Buckingham Palace As Corgi Damage Exceeds £20m

Kept from the public eye for decades, the extent of damage to furniture and carpets at Buckingham Palace has been revealed by ex-maid, Eileen Over in her serialised memoirs. The revelations, from the book, "Please Housetrain One's Corgis" ISBN A23PIS...

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Carpet Fitter Hailed A Hero

Funny story: Carpet Fitter Hailed A Hero

A carpet fitter from North Kensington, London, has been hailed a hero after having sex with his neighbour's parrot, Charlie, to calm it down during a fit of rage. Adam Wells, 32, dashed to the rescue of eighty-two-year-old Olive Lilley after Charlie,...

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Derek Acorah opens a carpet and laminate shop

Funny story: Derek Acorah opens a carpet and laminate shop

Derek Acorah, the world's most attractive, charismatic and psychic man is to broaden his portfolio with the addition of a carpet and laminate company. "The chain of stores will be opening in the next couple of weeks," said new CEO Adele Willring.

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Hague Received Backing From Gaddafi

Funny story: Hague Received Backing From Gaddafi

Foreign Secretary William Hague, already under fire after the botched diplomatic mission to Libya, is facing increased pressure to resign after it emerged that he received backing from Colonel Gaddafi only 2 weeks before civil unrest hit the oil rich...

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Meerkat Carpets Cause Outrage

Funny story: Meerkat Carpets Cause Outrage

Carpets made of Meerkats are being sold in a shop in Birmingham. The carpets are said to be of very good quality and, as Meerkats aren't a protected species, the vendors are perfectly within their rights to sell them. Meerkat wool is very luxuri...

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Carpet Found Under Boy's Bed

Funny story: Carpet Found Under Boy's Bed

A woman in the Potteries has today described the moment when she discovered that the floorboards underneath her son's bed were covered with carpet. Karen Low-Cal, 46, mother of Child C, who has behavioural problems, told how she had been clearing...

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Carpet and Drapery Companies Merge; Male Customers Excited

Funny story: Carpet and Drapery Companies Merge; Male Customers Excited

Long thought to be an interior decorating problem if the home or apartment owner was looking for a singular Bauhaus or Feng Shui look, the problem was solved last month as Mohawk Carpet and Bush Drapery companies completed their merger. "It was di...

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Carpet Ride Pensioner Hands Himself In

Funny story: Carpet Ride Pensioner Hands Himself In

A pensioner has today handed himself in to a top tabloid newspaper after seeing himself on Youtube negotiating traffic with a large rolled up carpet. 87 year old Rod Gripper, claims he was fetching the luxury piece of flooring for Mica, his mates...

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Robert Pattinson: Kristen Stewart Did Not Chew Lindsay Lohan's Carpet

Funny story: Robert Pattinson: Kristen Stewart Did Not Chew Lindsay Lohan's Carpet

The increasing prevalence of media articles claiming that moody Twilight sex-symbol Kristen Stewart is a rug-muncher have angered her gothic stud co-star and intimate friend Robert Pattinson so much that he has been moved to issue a denial of the rum...

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Bush reveals plan to steal Oval Office rug

Funny story: Bush reveals plan to steal Oval Office rug

President Bush Monday announced his plan to take the carpet in the Oval Office with him.

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TheLordGodCarpets.com

Funny story: TheLordGodCarpets.com

"I know, I know," said God to Moses over the telephone. "But I had to add Carpets because someone already had TheLordGod.com."...

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There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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