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Funny story: Brexit nearly happened in 1886

Brexit nearly happened in 1886

Brexit covers the newspapers these days like a tramp's vomit, but it isn't the first time Britain has considered leaving a large international organisation - it nearly happened in 1886. While the British Empire was approaching its peak, there was a small movement for Britain to leave it. Coincidentally, it was led by my great-uncle, also named Sir Geoffroy Cockface. Sir Geoffroy was trouserer t...
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Funny story: Two Fingers to the EU as UK Signs Trade Deal With Burkina Faso

Two Fingers to the EU as UK Signs Trade Deal With Burkina Faso

"The United Kingdom is open for business, now more than ever," that was Prime Minister Theresa May's post-Brexit message to journalists gathered at No. 10 Downing Street yesterday. Words expelled with both vigor and pomp, she was speaking after sign...
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Funny story: Britain's first Minister for Fashion

Britain's first Minister for Fashion

Prime Minister, Theresa May, has now appointed Britian's first ever Minister for Fashion. Former Lord Chancellor and Brexit architect, Michael Gove, began work yesterday in his new offices just off Carnaby Street. "Couldn't be a better location",...
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Funny story: National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

Britain's National Treasures, including the likes of Julie Walters and Dame Judi Dench, are to be rounded up and housed in a museum it was announced today. The new Culture Secretary, Karen Bradley today unveiled her plans stating that it was vita...
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Funny story: Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

Britain becomes third world country due to lack of third runway at Heathrow

LONDON, ENGLAND - The damning economic report issued today revealed the lowest GDP growth figures in British history, effectively rendering Britain a third world country. Economists, politicians and self-proclaimed "experts" from down the pub wer...
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Funny story: Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

Saudi Arabia to join Top Gear

RIYADH, KINGDOM OF SAUDI ARABIA - Saudi Arabia, the oil rich Gulf state, has continued its attempt to shake its bad reputation as a regressive, brutal dictatorship by joining the British motoring show Top Gear, replacing host Chris Evans, who left th...
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Funny story: Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

Northern Line at rush hour revealed as Dante's tenth circle of hell

In a shock statement, the tenth circle of hell from Dante's "Inferno" has been named as the Northern Line at rush hour. Intended as the circle to punish commuters for trusting the British public transportation system, this horrendous site sees an...
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Funny story: God to step down, names Alexis Taylor of Hot Chip as successor

God to step down, names Alexis Taylor of Hot Chip as successor

HEAVEN - God announced today in a press statement that he aimed to step down from the role of God. He clarified that: "it's difficult being God, people don't really get that there's a lot to it, you know, unleashing fiery vengeance upon whores an...
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Funny story: Great Britain Does It Better

Great Britain Does It Better

After watching the first bumbling day of the National Republican Convention in Cleveland, one can only remark, with a degree of envy, Great Britain does it better! Or as the song goes: Nobody Does It Better… Yep! David Cameron was PM for breakf...
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Funny story: Celts demand land rights

Celts demand land rights

According to a spokesman for the Celtic Universal Rights Society (CURS), Mr Dai Jones, the Celts were driven out of what is now Britain by successive waves of invaders, such as the Romans and Anglo-Saxons, leaving them only what is now Wales and part...
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Funny story: Channel Tunnel brought to a standstill by Brits hoping to escape the Island!

Channel Tunnel brought to a standstill by Brits hoping to escape the Island!

Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach Infiltration Army) special demographic upheaval reporter, Sir Bob Subterranean-Blues-Witherspoon, spent a filthy night under the English Channel observing an Exodus (Bob Marley intro please) of True Brits flooding the Chann...
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Funny story: New England/Scotland Partnership

New England/Scotland Partnership

Politicians in London emerged from the basement at 10 Downing Street after spending 3 weeks sequestered in a marathon brainstorming session to contrive a scheme to quash the Scottish rebellion and subjugate them with draconian punitive measures. T...
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Funny story: Conservative Party Manifesto 2015

Conservative Party Manifesto 2015

(Or, actually what Cameron meant to say but didn't, being the gentleman that he is and everything.) "Over the last five years, we have placed our country, according to our business partners' demands, in the U.S. and elsewhere, under total bureaucr...
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Funny story: TheSpoof.com Dead Right Again!

TheSpoof.com Dead Right Again!

Here is a verbatim report from an article in a leading British Paper. We are not making this up. This is actually what it said: "Sex scandal Labour grandee Lord Janner has been probed over ­allegations he was part of a ­Westminster paedophile ring. The Met police spent six months investigating claims the peer - said to be too frail from dementia to be prosecuted - was a guest at London sex a...
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Funny story: This Country's Gone to the Dogs Innit?

This Country's Gone to the Dogs Innit?

We have lost our bloody way as a nation we have. Our country has become infiltrated by joyless snobbish lefties, filthy immigrants, rampant homosexuals who are up for anything and miserable and fat feminists. What happened to the good old days innit? The good old days of Only Fools and Horses, Rolf Harris, Rod Stewart, The National Front, It It Ain't Half Hot Mum, New Faces, Jim'll Fix It, Dav...
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Funny story: Britain For The Brits!

Britain For The Brits!

We at Back and to the Left news pride ourselves on giving everyone a voice, including those of us who don't deserve one. We try to be as fair as we can be when it comes down to our interviews and subsequent write ups. So when we decided to interview a member of the group Britain First our peers (the other people in the hostel we currently call home) we're shocked. They asked us "why would you give...
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Funny story: Romans Return To Modern Day Britain

Romans Return To Modern Day Britain

Shock and awe abounded today as the Romans returned to reclaim what they proclaim is rightfully theirs. They might have come from a portal or out of a test tube or something in a mad scientists lab but they are here and you should be scared! All of m...
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Funny story: Britain forced to change name

Britain forced to change name

Britain can no longer call itself Great Britain after a high court ruling today. The Law Lords have decided after seeing evidence of poverty on a scale not seen outside of Africa that from now on Britain should be known as Bit Crap Britain instead.
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Despite Celebrating Crowds, Mugabe of Zimbabwe Won't Recognize Coup

The 93-year old thinks it's his birthday again and thanks all the demonstrators.
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