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Selecting a prayer partner for more effective prayer

I have observed over the years a despondency with some of our parishioners when their prayers have failed them. Sometimes they prayed for rain and got snow. Some have prayed to win the big Lotto Jackpot, only to do so, and find they have lost the win...

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Pope creates new tribunal to hide old tribunals sheltering of priests

Today, the pope created a new tribunal to judge the judges' in the old tribunal, who judged bishops accused of sheltering priests' abusive conduct in child sexual abuse cases. Msgr. Ignacio Colderanoni, was named chief judge over the objection of...

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Major Stores Reach Agreement On Cathedral And Church Use

Funny story: Major Stores Reach Agreement On Cathedral And Church Use

Several well known stores with high profile T.V. Christmas advertisements have reached agreement with bishops in the U.K. to utilise the huge amounts of prime City Centre Cathedral and Church interior and exterior space. Worshippers will be able to...

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Most Xmas Turkeys Ready Now Due To Global Warming

Funny story: Most Xmas Turkeys Ready Now Due To Global Warming

A glut of enormous fat turkeys in Norfolk is a result of early ripening due to global warming, our Christmas fowl correspondent was told by the Bishop of Norfolk this morning. This is the second year running that the church has got it wrong since mo...

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Accuracy of the Bible Queried by Bishop

The Bishop of Redruth has questioned the statements in the Bible that suggest the world began in 4004 BC or that Adam and Eve were the first on the scene. In a sermon to the congregation at Redruth Cathedral, attended by three sailors and a dog, B...

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Richard Dawkins Upsets Bishops

Richard Dawkins, famous atheist, known for his work on Darwin's theory of evolution has upset the Bishops by suggesting only about a half of British citizen say they are Christians and of those most don't believe most of it anyway and only go to Chur...

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Python sketch comes true for Barnsley bishop

The Bishop of Barnsley caused outrage yesterday when he announced he had undergone a surgical operation in which he was irreversibly conjoined with a pederast. Monty Python's 1973 LP Matching Tie and Handkerchief includes a sketch called 'Elephant...

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Bishop of Willesden jumps on bandwagon-speaking his mind about up-coming Royal Wedding

Funny story: Bishop of Willesden jumps on bandwagon-speaking his mind about up-coming Royal Wedding

"The Rt Rev Pete Broadbent, the Bishop of Willesden, chastised the "nauseating tosh" surrounding the announcement and likened the Prince and his fiancée to "shallow celebrities". " Not to be outdone by the Pope getting headlines in the press for l...

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Theological Conservatism in the U.S. Catholic Church; "Yikes"

Funny story: Theological Conservatism in the U.S. Catholic Church; "Yikes"

Women's rights and separation of church and state supporters beware, there's a new sheriff in town, and his name is Archbishop Timothy Dolan from New York. At a time when the Catholic church should be mending fences with parishioners over a recurr...

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Bishop To Open New Scat Park

The Bishop of Spalding has opened a new Scat Park based in the Scottish town of Arbroath on Friday morning. It is based on Ecclesiastical Way, close to the town centre. The manager of the new facility, Herman Dribble said that he hoped that the n...

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Sex In The City Does Go On Bishop Admits

Funny story: Sex In The City Does Go On Bishop Admits

Bishop Podraig O'Malley of Birmingham today admitted that people in the city are having sex most of the time. Speaking from a desk at Aston University, he told us: "When you do that Google Earth thing, you can see all the streets, and the building...

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British unite against Archbishops

Funny story: British unite against Archbishops

The British today have urged people not to let ridicule about weird freaks being Archbishops drive them to writing spoof articles about them. Two of the freaks, Dr Rowan Pervy and Dr John Pervu, said it would be 'tragic' if they lost their jobs, a...

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Boche Bash Bish

Funny story: Boche Bash Bish

The German government has today hit out at Holocaust-denying Bishop Richard Williamson after his forced departure from Argentina raised headlines around the world. They are demanding that he is extradited to Germany where holocaust denial is a crimi...

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Barking Bishop Williamson starts new wacky social website

Funny story: Barking Bishop Williamson starts new wacky social website

The Barking Bishop - Bishop Richard Williamson - has brought the Roman Catholic Church into the internet age with the development of a special new social website in celebration of the rescinding of his 1988 excommunication by the Pope. "Arsebook"...

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Indian Catholic Bishop's Adoption of Young Woman is 'Just Tip of Sandal'

Funny story: Indian Catholic Bishop's Adoption of Young Woman is 'Just Tip of Sandal'

Kerala, India - Catholic Bishop John Lobha of Kochi, India may be in deep elephant dung for his recent adoption of a 26 year old woman. Bishop Lobha allegedly met the young woman on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. She is the daughter of an Orthodox pr...

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Bishop's conference off to a showbiz start this morning

Funny story: Bishop's conference off to a showbiz start this morning

Forget about gay members of the clergy, women bishops and vergers paying too much attention to their choirboys - this morning's Bishop's conference got off to a cracking, showbiz-style start.

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Cut-Price Bishops Not Up To The Job

Funny story: Cut-Price Bishops Not Up To The Job

The Archbishop of Canterbury has confirmed that the Church of England has cancelled its controversial supply contracts with various Eastern European states.

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10 Things to do with a Bishop

1) Keep it in your garden to prevent the ingress of Jehovah's Witnesses, wandering minstrels, excommunicated heretics, Mormons and stray domestic fowls (this is not a suitable use of a wandering bishop, who will tend to stray from his post, though auxiliary and retired bishops will be content to stand in your garden).

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