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The Case Against Recreation - Part 20: Bicycling

Funny story: The Case Against Recreation - Part 20: Bicycling

Bicycling- The growing popularity of this activity illustrates the utterly obvious infiltration of obsessive pseudo-sexual perversion running rampant throughout society like a bicyclist running through a red light at a busy intersection. The term "bicycle" is a combination of two root words meaning bi (as in bipolar or bisexual), and cycle (as in vicious cycle or recycled waste). The underlying de...

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John Kerry denies he was doing lazy 8s

A little earlier today, I contacted Mass. General Hospital to check on the status of Secretary of State Kerry because of his bicycle accident. I had to pull some strings to get inside, but I managed to reach his doctor, Dr. Handleman Keurner, chie...

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World Naked Bike Ride

Funny story: World Naked Bike Ride

Police were forced to intervene in the naked cycling event in Canterbury - after reports one of the riders got 'overexcited'. The 'aroused' cyclist was pulled aside and put his jeans back on before being spoken to by officers. Superintendant Ro...

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The End Of Hipsters?

Funny story: The End Of Hipsters?

San Francisco, CA - It has been a good, long ride for the waxed mustache set, but it appears that there might be moth holes in the secondhand fabric that is keeping this trend together. We talked to a well-pierced waxy named "Scat-Cat," who claimed t...

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Nissan to enter Tour De France with Electric Bikes

Funny story: Nissan to enter Tour De France with Electric Bikes

After Nissan's recent announcement that it would enter the Le Mans 24 hour motor race in 2015 if it is allowed to build a car outside of the rules that everyone else must abide by, it appears that they have also turned their sights on The Tour de Fra...

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Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong Sell Their Business Venture

Funny story: Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong Sell Their Business Venture

CHICAGO - Former sports figures Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong opened up The Been There - Done That Private Detective Agency in February of this year and they've announced that they have just sold it. Armstrong spoke with Cutter Shiloh of Ameri...

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Lance Armstrong and Roger Clemens Going Into Business Together

Funny story: Lance Armstrong and Roger Clemens Going Into Business Together

CHICAGO - It appears that two of the sports world's fallen figures have announced plans for a new business venture. Lance Armstrong, the lying road racing cyclist champion and Roger Clemens, the lying baseball pitcher recently met at The Crocked C...

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Lance Armstrong Is Moving To The South Pole

Funny story: Lance Armstrong Is Moving To The South Pole

NEW ORLEANS - Lance Armstrong was recently seen riding his bicycle down on Bourbon Street. According to Tango Brisket with Sports Territory Magazine, Armstrong was wearing a Mitt Romney "Frankenstein" Halloween mask and was dressed in an LSU sweat...

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Cycle Paths Discovered On Mars By NASA Probe

Funny story: Cycle Paths Discovered On Mars By NASA Probe

NASA scientists were jubilant, yet cautiously optimistic last night that there is indeed life on Mars, after the Phobos probe beamed back still images of what appear to be cycle paths on the surface of the planet Mars. The paths, estimated to be b...

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Chapter 7: Yorkshire Puddings

Funny story: Chapter 7: Yorkshire Puddings

Previously in this Multi-Titled Collaboration: Passing Newcastle, Durham and Middlesborough as rapidly as possible, QM and George, alias, you know who by now, knew there would be a problem further down the road as they approached Tyke (Yorkshire for our US colleagues) territory. Whilst the others headed for a small, partially functioning but unknown to most Airport in the small North Yorkshir...

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The Man On The Bike Spotted In Aleppo, Syria

Funny story: The Man On The Bike Spotted In Aleppo, Syria

A mysterious man, known as 'The Man On The Bike' has turned up yet again in the background of news footage shot by the BBC in Aleppo, Syria, in the midst of a protest march following Friday prayers. Initially it was thought that The Man On The Bik...

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Mybster To Dunbeath: The Journey Continues..

Funny story: Mybster To Dunbeath: The Journey Continues..

First leg. Second leg. Eventually, many hours and beers later, they stumbled through the door of the Auld Post Office, and were confronted with the alarming sight of.................Nick Hobbs eating a falafel. It was alarming because both Seaton and JO knew that the Auld Post Office didn't sell falafel, so where had Nick got it from? "Hi guys!" said Nick, spitting falafel all over h...

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Thurso to Mybster, The Journey Continues.

Funny story: Thurso to Mybster, The Journey Continues.

The Story So Far............. Never Wanting To Get Involved at This Early Stage, Seaton Carew dragged his sorry arse from his bed and was nearly physically sick when he saw the time. The Bed & Breakfast in which he was staying, in Scrabster on the outskirts of Thusro, was a bit of of a flea pit. Worse than that, it was a shit pit and he was glad to be leaving. Climbing wearily onto hi...

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The Spoof John o Groats bike run first leg; John O to Thurso!

Funny story: The Spoof John o Groats bike run first leg; John O to Thurso!

22.06.2011, John O Groats, Bonny Scotland; 0500 AM (and it's fucking freezing!) Accompanied by his support team of a toothless, chewing Shetland pony, several horny Highland cattle, a force 8 gale and buckets of rain, Jaggedone set out on the first leg of the "Spoof charity bike run from John O Groats to Lands End" and he even remembered to apply his bike clips before leaving. There was no opti...

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Government To Introduce £104 Road Tax For Cyclists

Funny story: Government To Introduce £104 Road Tax For Cyclists

A Whitehall mole today revealed that Transport Minister, Norman Baker, is to introduce a controversial new £104 annual road tax for cyclists. Early reports indicate that the new charges will apply from April 1st 2012 and that there will be no exce...

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Oil Execs to Congress: "Let Them Eat Cake, Ride Their Bicycles!"

The big oil executives came to Congress this last week and told them to "stick it!" As one executive put it, "Let them eat cake and if they can't afford a few dollars for gas they can ride their bicycles to the welfare office. Most of these people d...

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Rosie Huntington-Whiteley And Cameron Diaz Spotted Riding A Tandem Around Hollywood By Cheryl Cole

Funny story: Rosie Huntington-Whiteley And Cameron Diaz Spotted Riding A Tandem Around Hollywood By Cheryl Cole

Plymouth UK born FHM Hot 100 chart topper Rosie Huntington-Whiteley has been spotted riding a tandem around Hollywood with fellow FHM hottie, the actress Cameron Diaz. According to X-Factor USA judge, Cheryl Cole. Providing the reports coming in f...

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Burnley MP's pedal power message

Funny story: Burnley MP's pedal power message

BURNLEY MP Gordon Birtwistle took advantage of a photo opportunity and used pedal power to support an energy saving campaign. He is backing "Earth Hour", when people across the world will switch off their lights on March 26 between 8.30pm and 9.3...

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Breaking news…

Emmanuel Macron Doesn’t Speak Trumpish

Anyone notice, French President Emmanuel Macron speaks better English than Donald Trump? And no superlatives necessary...Sad!
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