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Funny satire stories about Betting

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Funny story:  Charles Barkley Wins $2.3 Million on The Heat-Pacers Championship Game

Charles Barkley Wins $2.3 Million on The Heat-Pacers Championship Game

MIAMI - Charles Barkley AKA The Fat Bro was grinning from ear-to-ear as he bet on the Miami Heat to defeat the Indiana Pacers in the decisive game 7 of the best of 7 Eastern Conference Championship. The Heat had no trouble disposing of the Pacers...
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Funny story:  Kentucky Derby Winner Orb May Not Run In The Preakness

Kentucky Derby Winner Orb May Not Run In The Preakness

BALTIMORE - Word coming out of the home of The Preakness is that Kentucky Derby winner, Orb may not be entered to race in the second jewel of the Triple Crown race. Orb's owner Stuart "Horsey" Janney said that he was told by Orb's nutritionist ide...
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Funny story:  Charles Barkley Wins $1,280,000 On Kentucky Derby Winner Orb

Charles Barkley Wins $1,280,000 On Kentucky Derby Winner Orb

LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - The 139th running of The Kentucky Derby was run on a field that was muddier than the town scenes in the western AMC TV series Hell On Wheels. Orb who was favored at 6 to 1 odds started the race in 19th place out of 19 horses...
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Funny story:  President Obama Makes An NBA Bet With Jack Nicholson

President Obama Makes An NBA Bet With Jack Nicholson

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Jack Nicholson recently won a $100,000 bet when the Los Angeles Lakers managed to somehow limp into the NBA Western Conference playoffs. And now the star of Easy Rider, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, A Few Good Men and Oops...
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Funny story:  President Obama Makes An NBA Bet With Mitt Romney

President Obama Makes An NBA Bet With Mitt Romney

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama is smiling from ear-to-ear after having made an NBA bet with the man he defeated in the 2012 presidential election, Mitt Romney. President Obama said that he was sitting in the backyard at the White House enjoyin...
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Funny story:  The Charlotte Bobcats and The Orlando Magic Hoping To Keep From Being The Worst Team In The NBA

The Charlotte Bobcats and The Orlando Magic Hoping To Keep From Being The Worst Team In The NBA

CHARLOTTE, North Carolina - The Charlotte Bobcats who have a 17-54 record and the Orlando Magic who have an 18-54 record are each trying their very best to keep away from the NBA cellar. Sports Balls Illustrated Daily has just announced that there...
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Funny story:  Jack Nicholson Makes a $100,000 Bet That The Lakers Will Make The Playoffs

Jack Nicholson Makes a $100,000 Bet That The Lakers Will Make The Playoffs

LOS ANGELES - The all-time number one Los Angeles Lakers fan Jack Nicholson is finally smiling again. Fresh from appearing at the Academy Award Show and hitting on the winner of the Best Actress Award 22-year-old Jennifer Lawrence, or J-Law, as Ry...
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Funny story:  Bookies Offering New Odds on Armageddon

Bookies Offering New Odds on Armageddon

Several UK Bookmakers have spread their interest in the latest developments in the Savile case. They are now offering odds on the following: (1) Many Freemasons and some of those who run their organization particularly those living in Scotland are corrupt. 1/10 (2) Many lawyers and barristers operating in the UK and some judges and their peers are corrupt. 1/10 (3) Many working in the Sec...
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Funny story:  Bookies' odds on Jimmy Savile case - place bets now!

Bookies' odds on Jimmy Savile case - place bets now!

Bookmakers throughout Britain have opened a book on the investigation into the Jimmy Savile affair. They are offering odds on the following. (1) Investigation will plod along until the media are ordered from on high to dumb it down out of existence and to "pursue it no further" blah, blah, blah and it simply disappears as the public are lulled back into televisual narcosis. 3/1 (2) Invest...
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Funny story:  "F**k The Diamond Jubilee!" campaign set to make a killing

"F**k The Diamond Jubilee!" campaign set to make a killing

London - An offshoot of last year's F**k The Royal Wedding anti-humbuggery club stands to win a million pounds if the Queen drops dead before next weekend's Jubilee shindig. The F**k The Diamond Jubilee! group got odds of 25/1 on Queen Elizabeth p...
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Funny story:  Panic as bookies prepare to pay out for a White Easter

Panic as bookies prepare to pay out for a White Easter

For the first time in living memory, bookies in the south of England are preparing themselves to pay out for a White Easter. "Who knew?" said Falstaff Bier, a bookmaker from Romford. "We've been accepting bets on White Easter's for decades, and ne...
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Funny story:  Vegas Odds Makers Drop Lines on Bieber, J-Lo, Putin and the Detroit Lions

Vegas Odds Makers Drop Lines on Bieber, J-Lo, Putin and the Detroit Lions

Famous for setting odds on anything from the number of fights in a hockey game to whether or not Janet Jackson might bear a breast on national television, Las Vegas statisticians and odds makers are refusing to set lines on Justin Bieber, J-Lo and Vl...
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Funny story:  Betting Suspended on Harry Redknapp to be next England manager

Betting Suspended on Harry Redknapp to be next England manager

Bookmakers stopped taking bets today on Harry Redknapp to be the next manager of the England football team when reports of large bets were being placed around the country - including Portsmouth, Bournemouth, London, Leicester and Sheffield. The FA...
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Funny story:  Rooney Sr 'held in suspicious batting scam' - reports

Rooney Sr 'held in suspicious batting scam' - reports

Liverpool - Investigators probing suspected cricket match fixing have arrested a number of people including someone with the same name as the famous Manchester United striker. Wayne Rooney Senior was described as 'seventh of nine' in the group hel...
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Funny story:  Queen's credit rating downgraded as Palace fails to clear Epsom Derby betting debts

Queen's credit rating downgraded as Palace fails to clear Epsom Derby betting debts

Ascot - Online bookmaker RoyalMugPunter.con is still awaiting settlement of Derby Day IOUs on disastrous royal no-hoper Carlton House. House of Windsor losses are said to account for much of the £50 million that bookies raked in when French-traine...
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Funny story:  Wheeling, West Virginia Woodchucks Answer Eternal Question

Wheeling, West Virginia Woodchucks Answer Eternal Question

Walt and Whitney Wilson in Wheeling, West Virginia wanted to know "how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood." They were unsatisfied with the answer "as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
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Funny story:  World Cup 2010 - Greece Installed As New Favourites

World Cup 2010 - Greece Installed As New Favourites

In a surprising development, Greece, probably the worst team ever to appear in the World Cup finals, and yesterday 1000-1 outsiders, are now 1-4 on favourites to win the competition. The sudden shift in betting odds came in the aftermath of Greece...
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Funny story:  Las Vegas Oddsmakers Taking Book On Reasons For Al And Tipper Gore Divorce

Las Vegas Oddsmakers Taking Book On Reasons For Al And Tipper Gore Divorce

Las Vegas oddsmakers are making book on the real reason why the 40 year marriage between Senator and Former Vice President Al Gore and his wife Tipper is ending. While the two have issued a joint statement saying that the marriage has dissolved...
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