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Santa Furious Trump Has Set Up Christmas Eve No-Fly Zones Over Homes of Rivals

Funny story: Santa Furious Trump Has Set Up Christmas Eve No-Fly Zones Over Homes of Rivals

Come Christmas Eve, many prominent Democrats will find themselves with empty stockings hanging from their fireplaces. The reason? President Elect Trump has declared the areas over their homes No-Fly Zones, so Santa and Rudolph cannot drop off gifts.

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Born To Spoof: Chapter 99 The Return to Insanity

Funny story: Born To Spoof: Chapter 99 The Return to Insanity

The snow fell through the black soot in the air of the mean streets of East London. It was Christmas Eve, yet the only thought on my mind was this: Is it possible to de-clone a clone? I was in my usual melancholy self as I shuffled through the slush towards The Spoof. I stopped on a street corner and stared at its dingy neon flashing light "The Spoof Writer's Pub", then underneath, "Members On...

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Slap Happy Holidays

Funny story: Slap Happy Holidays

Newark, NJ - Traveling anywhere these days can be quite the never ending, here to there, and, hopefully, all the way back, painful experience. All of which, of course, gets a decided, rollover-like irritation boost, of sorts, during the holidays. And, especially if, by chance, said travel plans takes you along a sometimes, anything but unamused, international-like route. That, more often t...

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Dorking Rolls Out The Red Carpet For Writers Of The Dorking Review

Funny story: Dorking Rolls Out The Red Carpet For Writers Of The Dorking Review

It has been described as 'the book that everybody should have in their Christmas stocking' - The Dorking Review. And Dorking today rolled out the red carpet as the book's writers rolled up in the town for an impromptu book signing at Waterfall's book...

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Nine things that'll guarantee you'll be a miserable bastard in the new year

Funny story: Nine things that'll guarantee you'll be a miserable bastard in the new year

Bah-Humbug is your middle name. But why should a miserable bastard only get to be miserable at the holidays? Commit to memory these easy-to-follow steps and you'll be sure to be insufferable for all twelve months. 1) Run away from your problems. Why face problems head on when you can run from them and possibly make others feel as if these same problems were theirs and not yours. 2) Tell your...

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Ashton Kutcher Says That He Did Not Appreciate Demi Moore's Christmas Gift One Damn Bit!

Funny story: Ashton Kutcher Says That He Did Not Appreciate Demi Moore's Christmas Gift One Damn Bit!

SHERMAN OAKS, California - The star of Two and A Half Men, Ashton Kutcher, is definitely upset enough for two and a half men. It seems that Kutcher received a Christmas gift from FedEx which he said was actually in one piece but which he absolute...

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Plucky Brits Advised: - Enjoy Your Turkey - Next Year It'll Be Roast Rat And Pigeon Pie

Funny story: Plucky Brits Advised: - Enjoy Your Turkey - Next Year It'll Be Roast Rat And Pigeon Pie

As Britain reels under the pulverising blows of the double-treble salsa cheesy dip recession, Chancellor 'Gorgeously Ugly' George Osborne warned legions of plucky Brits to enjoy their turkey this Christmas, because next year - if economic indicators...

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Dorking headmaster slams 'bullying' gossip website

Funny story: Dorking headmaster slams 'bullying' gossip website

Surrey - Police are investigating a 'cruel and unusual website' accused of bullying by a Dorking headmaster disgusted with its 'homophobic, racist and sexist' rants. Dave Skag, head of Dorking High, said the Little Gossip website was full of hate...

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Ten Comparisons between Santa Claus & David Cameron

Funny story: Ten Comparisons between Santa Claus & David Cameron

The Comparisons between Santa and David Cameron 1. When the poor ask Santa for something, the odds of receiving what you wanted are infinitesimal, with Cameron, it's impossible. 2. Santa seldom answers the poor's you email, Cameron never answers the poor's emails. 3. Santa seldom answers the poor's mail, Cameron never answers the poor's mail. 4. Santa gets all the stuff he's got from k...

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Quotes from President Obama's Political Speeches Reported

Funny story: Quotes from President Obama's Political Speeches Reported

Washington DC: President Obama during a Democratic campaign speech given in Osawatomie, Kansas echoed the words of President Theodore Roosevelt (1901-1909). Overlooked by the media were other occasions where the Chief Executive utilized themes originally expressed by William Shakespeare. Friends, Republicans, countrymen, lend me your tax money. To drill or not to drill that is the question.

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'Yule be sorry' hackers told as Winter Solstice big guns put on dazzling display

Funny story: 'Yule be sorry' hackers told as Winter Solstice big guns put on dazzling display

London - Squirming worm-like red top hackers are on Winter Solstice high alert despite Tuesday's stellar TV performance by Piers Morgan. Tomorrow's 5.30am solar ingress into Capricorn seize (sic) some stunning astrological aspects vying to flush o...

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Dame Penelope Farthing Makes Clean Sweep At Dorking Xmas Pickles And Preserves Festival

Funny story: Dame Penelope Farthing Makes Clean Sweep At Dorking Xmas Pickles And Preserves Festival

Celebrations were well under way at Felcher's Bottom Manor last night, as local aristocrat, Dame Penelope Farthing swept the board at the 71st annual Dorking Xmas Pickles And Preserves Festival, which this year was held on the top field of the Starli...

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Dyslexic Man Proclaims Bah Humbug after Bedbug Infestation

Funny story: Dyslexic Man Proclaims Bah Humbug after Bedbug Infestation

Filing an insect nuisance report with the New York Department of Adult Entertainment Licensing and Insect Eradication, a man who had first said his name was Pike Marker, claims that his entire apartment complex is "wovered cith humbugs", apparently j...

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Bah, Humbug! Great British Eccentrics Hold Christmas Party In Stately Home

Funny story: Bah, Humbug! Great British Eccentrics Hold Christmas Party In Stately Home

Oldham Hall, Gloucestershire, England. - The last of a dying breed of great British eccentrics held their annual Christmas get together here on Saturday night. The guest list read like a who's who of traditional crackpots, foul mouthed harridans, psy...

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Congress Applauds Commemorative Humbug Fish Currency Program

Funny story: Congress Applauds Commemorative Humbug Fish Currency Program

Washington, DC - In an unprecedented move, Republicans and Democrats have rallied behind the introduction of the Commemorative Humbug Fish Currency Program. Just in time for the holidays, Americans will be able to use the Humbug Dascyllus in lieu of...

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Christmas Greetings From Germany

Funny story: Christmas Greetings From Germany

Greetings to all friends in England from the peoples of Germany. This Christmas being is much wonderful time here. The markets traditional have many peoples there in. Hot wine and sweetmeats buying there of. Also many other things. Here in the markets are also selling the traditional Christmas tree branch of chocolate bar Hamburg which fish is selling. Also hats. Many sorts for wearing...

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Jesus wept! Japan authorities declare 'Fukushima stable' a holy birth shrine

Funny story: Jesus wept! Japan authorities declare 'Fukushima stable' a holy birth shrine

Tokyo - Jesus was born inside a nuclear fast breeder reactor according to Japanese sources which have placed the Fukishima 'stable' on the conservation 'at risk' register. Fallout specialists said today some historical corrections may be needed to...

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Bah Humbug! Local Man develops Man Flu and Yuppie Flu at the same time

Funny story: Bah Humbug! Local Man develops Man Flu and Yuppie Flu at the same time

Christmas may be a time of mistletoe and wine, but it is also a time of coughs and sniffles, and it seems that the long winter months are being blamed for a sharp rise in cases of combined Yuppie/Man Flu (or YuMF for short). Practitioners describe th...

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Jabba the Trump

I find when I watch cable news in the morning, I much prefer watching Donald Trump talk with the volume off. Imagine an orange Jabba the Hutt as a talentless mime.
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