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Funny satire stories about Bad weather

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Funny story: Winds of up to six miles an hour knock over train

Winds of up to six miles an hour knock over train

South Eastern Trains have reported that one of its carriages was knocked over during high speed winds yesterday. The Environmental Agency clocked wind speeds reaching a high of ten miles an hour, that's twice the average walking speed of a human...
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Funny story: Wind causes massive structural damage to everything in the world!

Wind causes massive structural damage to everything in the world!

Following last week's barometer breaking wind speeds, officials from someplace have announced plans to erect new wind breakers at several key locations around the United Kingdoom. Many unsavouries, previously thought upon as being especially savo...
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Funny story: Spring unapologetic for striking over temperature cuts

Spring unapologetic for striking over temperature cuts

Spring has refused to apologise for going on strike in Britain this year, instead citing immigrants, an unfortunate bout of Hepatitis B and government temperature cuts as a valid excuse for no longer giving a fuck whether elderly couples can drink Pi...
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Funny story: Americans Arm Themselves In Preparation for Heavy Snowfall

Americans Arm Themselves In Preparation for Heavy Snowfall

Sales of automatic weapons and assault rifles have almost trebled overnight in some north eastern States as Northerners prepare themselves for an onslaught of inclement weather. Forecasters have predicted a massive blizzard poised to dump up to 3...
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Funny story: Caravan holiday becomes a boating holiday for one Dorking couple

Caravan holiday becomes a boating holiday for one Dorking couple

Selma and Cedric Seeward, a couple from Dorking, took a caravanning holiday to Truro. All was going well, if a bit wet, when the caravan park was hit by six inches of rain in one hour, bursting the banks of the local river. "There was quite a lot of rain," said Selma. "Wasn't there Cedric?" "There was quite a lot of rain," Cedric confirmed. As the pair watched from the caravan window, the...
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Funny story: Bartholomew Utterswaithe: I miss my daily walk into Nottingham!

Bartholomew Utterswaithe: I miss my daily walk into Nottingham!

Bartholomew Utterswaithe, our 65 year old Nottingham correspondent and unemployed Gas Street lamp wick trimmer, found himself housebound the other day. Partly due to his arthritis, losing his free-bus-pass, the flapping holed sole of of his right shoe, and the lousy wet weather. He was straining a thrice-used Asda tea bag, and thought about what he might be missing on his cancelled wonderful...
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Funny story: Met office backs down- Snow melted

Met office backs down- Snow melted

The Met office today reversed their earlier statement regarding the massive amounts of snow forecast for the UK stating today. "Its just a light dusting" The statement angered thousands of pensioners across the UK who were preparing to freeze to deat...
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Funny story: Deadly snow forcast - Boffins confirm link with seasons

Deadly snow forcast - Boffins confirm link with seasons

Met office boffins today release an extreme weather warning as the nation readies its self for another battle with mother nature. Top met office scientist Prof Andrew Swanker said today "we now have enough data to prove there is a correlation betw...
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Funny story: Have a Hurricane Named After You

Have a Hurricane Named After You

The American Meteorological Society has decided that the hurricanes in the 2012 hurricane season can be named subject to a five hundred dollar fee. "We are trying to save up for a new supercomputer," said meteorologist Katrina Gomez. "Up until now...
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Funny story: George Osborne Does The Weather Forecast

George Osborne Does The Weather Forecast

Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne was defiant yesterday in the teeth of Opposition calls for an economic policy U-Turn. Britain's output fell by 0.5% in the last quarter of 2010. Expectant experts had expected a small amount of growth.
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Funny story: Hornby Train Sales Derailed By Winter Weather

Hornby Train Sales Derailed By Winter Weather

Model train manufacturer Horny has warned that its profits will be below forecasts because of the bad weather before Christmas. The much-loved company, which also owns model racing car system Scalextric and plastic model manufacturer Airfix, says...
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Funny story: Arkansas Bird Deaths To Trigger Massive East Coast Blizzard Next Week

Arkansas Bird Deaths To Trigger Massive East Coast Blizzard Next Week

New York, NY-- The strange bird deaths in Arkansas last week may have an unforeseen consequence. The dead birds seem to have created a small vortex in the atmosphere. That vortex is growing, and will become a monstrous blizzard on the US East Coast...
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Funny story: Build An Ark, Says Weatherman

Build An Ark, Says Weatherman

The recent unseasonal bad weather across the UK has prompted weather experts to offer some astounding advice to the public as a way of dealing with the conditions.
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Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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