Doctors in the small town of Flooters Bend have announced that a baby with a Phillips head butt crack was born in a local hospital yesterday, a never-before seen occurrence. "It's unique, alright," said Dr. Lionel Shizzmer, the doctor who delivered...
A study has shown that even very young babies may have a mean streak. Apparently, they very much enjoy seeing puppets which make food choices they don't approve of getting punished. This charming behavior begins as early as 9 months. The work, don...
Philadelphia, PA-- The youngest person ever to live has been discovered in the City of Brotherly Love. Miss Jane Doe was officially documented to be only one-second old shortly after her birth this morning at the University of Pencilvainia Hospital.
SAN FRANCISCO, California (ABSNN) - The City Board of Supervisors of San Francisco voted 6-5 Tuesday to prohibit Bay Area residents ever again getting nekkid. Even showering in the nude is now a felony crime.
"All forms of nekkidness is hereby and...
Child Psychologists are astounded at new discoveries involving the minds of babies. Apart from a baby's ability to prefer a nice puppet over a nasty one, there is also strong evidence to show that he or she can discern cringe-worthiness, stupidity, l...
CANON CITY, Colorado - Maddie Jo Ketzlinko, 27, and her grandmother Gretchen Batboxette, 73, were visiting the nationally famous Royal Gorge.
Mrs. Ketzlinko who is 8 months, 3 weeks, and 6 days pregnant told her granny that she wanted to bungee ju...
Celebrations were in full flow at the Grey Locks nursing home in Krupton today as four residents all gave birth to bouncing babies on the same day.
Agnes Smith, aged ninety six, who underwent her first ever Caesarian to give birth to baby Karen s...
Washington, DC - The President held a surprise press conference this morning for a small group of reporters. There he was asked if he really knew where he was born.
"I can't actually remember where I was born", the President replied to the report...
Households throughout the UK were filled with the sounds of people vomiting last night as Liverpool gained some respect at the end of a difficult season by stuffing their FA Cup nemesis.
The scousers roused themselves from Saturday's final defeat...
California - Angelina Jolie is advising parents to leave their children in hospitals, fire stations, police stations and emergency medical facilities as required by law instead of killing their babies.
Police officials argue that a parent's worst...
New York, NY-- A new report presented to the United Nations claims that childhood is now over after only 12 months. Children seem to be growing up much faster than before. No one knows why but Global Warming is suspected.
Children are still phy...
The recently released iPad3, which actually comes from a different universe, different milky way and different planet (especially for over 60 year-olds Granny Smiths) seems to have certain deficiencies. The major one is; it seems to be too heavy for...
An American research study on childbirth shows that, on average, labor takes longer now in comparison to 50 years ago.
A Spoof reporter, seeking to understand what's behind these findings, interviewed a sample of new moms and newborns (you guessed...
The Bonobo "Whoopee" Apes in the Democratic Republic of the Congo are becoming extinct even though they have sex every few minutes, even while they're eating.
"It is an amazing fact", stated Penelope Swinger of one Bonobo Sanctuary in the central...
Dakota and Joshua are about to be new parents, but the question of what to name their new baby is still on their minds. They want a name that gives the baby a strong identity without threatening other babies. While sipping a latte at a local beanery, they expressed their concerns.
"It's so important. Maybe we should wait until the baby can decide on it's own." suggested Dakota.
"This...
Sandra Buttock has been photographed clutching this season's ultimate in airport fashion accessory chic - a black baby. It seems that any celebrity worth her weight in liposuction and unrelenting man problems is being digitally snapped in a litany of...
Horrified civic fathers at an Irish seaside resort are urging their townsfolk to start getting it on.
The population of Kilkee, County Clare, has apparently seen a 'catastrophic' fall of 301 to 1,024 since the 2006 census.
Local councillors fea...
The office of National Statistics has reported an alarming increase in the number of Atheist babies being born to religious parents. Anna and Steve Gutridge of Lower Funting, Harts are one such couple:
"I'm C of E and the wife has what you might d...