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Funny story: Scare As Second Turner Prize Masterpiece Goes Missing

Scare As Second Turner Prize Masterpiece Goes Missing

A full scale lockdown at the Tate Modern Museum kicked in automatically when the curator pressed the security master switch, days after exhibit "Empty Room With Lights Going On And Off" was stolen. The runner up Turner Prize winning work of art,...
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Funny story: Martin Creed's Turner Prize Empty Room Stolen By Daredevil Thieves

Martin Creed's Turner Prize Empty Room Stolen By Daredevil Thieves

In a daring raid on the Tate Modern gallery in London, a £2million masterpiece by conceptual artist Martin Creed was stolen in the early hours of this morning. The masterpiece, an empty room with lights going on and off repeatedly, won the Turner Pri...
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Funny story: US student rescued from giant German vagina sculpture tested for STDs

US student rescued from giant German vagina sculpture tested for STDs

Tübingen, Germany - (Ass Mess): A 100ft, 32-ton red Veronese marble sculpture of a vagina positioned outside Tübingen University Institute for Microbiology and Virology is being tested for sexually transmitted diseases this week following an inciden...
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Funny story: Dead oligarch's $50m art collection bombs

Dead oligarch's $50m art collection bombs

St Tropez, South of France - Administrators of the late Boris Berezovsky's estate are gutted that the Russian oligarch's precious art collection has turned out to be a pile of old Jackson Pollox. Nineteen paintings from his French villa Chateau E...
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Funny story: Jesus and Disciples Were Not Present When da Vinci Painted "The Last Supper"

Jesus and Disciples Were Not Present When da Vinci Painted "The Last Supper"

Milan, Italy - An international panel of art experts and historians has unanimously agreed that Jesus Christ and his 12 Disciples were not actually present and did not personally sit for Leonardo da Vinci when da Vinci painted his famous mural "The L...
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Funny story: New York Musician dies

New York Musician dies

This week, unique and influential musician Art Johnson has died outside his home in New York at the age of 53. The circumstances surrounding his death are still unclear, but it appears that he choked to death on a parking ticket which he refused to pay. He was eating it in protest when he met his tragic end. Johnson was always wary of authority. He first came to prominence in the music bars of...
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Funny story: Spanish Queens Art Fraudster Busted

Spanish Queens Art Fraudster Busted

New York - A Spaniard who masterminded a $80m art forgery scam out of a seedy Queens apartment has been arrested and charged with peddling a load of fraudulent old Jackson Pollox. FBI agents pounced on José Carlos Bergantinos Diaz, 69, last Friday...
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Funny story: Van Gogh On Viagra? Secret Ingredient Passed Around.

Van Gogh On Viagra? Secret Ingredient Passed Around.

Artist Vincent Van Gogh is well known post-impressionist whose works bring millions of dollars in any auction. But why did he change his paintings later in his life? "He went from bright Sunflowers to Blue self-portraits", stated one art critic. H...
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Funny story: Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Out of Sight, Out of Mind

The police of Nice, France were somewhat embarrassed this morning, sheepishly admitting to a clamouring throng of reporters in a small room of uncomfortable chairs, that they had made an error in earlier reports of the recovery of a stolen masterpiec...
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Funny story: Art history: finger painting

Art history: finger painting

Finger paints are bright primary colors that artists apply to canvases using their fingers, rather than brushes, to save money and avoid costly cleanup. During spring break, Miss Ruthie invented the medium when she was thinking of a "fun, creative project" for her daycare students. They got bored easily, she explained, and she wanted to find a way to divert them for the hours between nap time a...
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Funny story: Francis Bacon Sandwich self portrait fetches $50m at NYC auction

Francis Bacon Sandwich self portrait fetches $50m at NYC auction

New York - The selfie is thought to have been inspired by the aritst's brief stay at an East Ham, London massage parlor where two voluptuous masseuses plied him with drink before getting out an old Polaroid. Tonight bidding for the 10" x 6" maste...
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Funny story: NASA Puts "Yellow Ladder" Into Orbit

NASA Puts "Yellow Ladder" Into Orbit

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - MoMA, the Museum of Modern Art in New York City, has confirmed that Petrov Daviditch's Post Modern Masterpiece, Yellow Ladder Floating in Deep Space, has been successfully put into orbit as the Milky Way Galaxy's first known art...
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Funny story: 2014 Burning Man Festival Relocates to Craters of the Moon

2014 Burning Man Festival Relocates to Craters of the Moon

ARCO, IDAHO - Burning Man Festival Organizers have announced the location for the 2014 event will not be Nevada's Black Rock Desert, as is usual. "Our Vibe is telling us that we need to acknowledge the Earth's pain," said spokesman Kish Hipscombe,...
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Funny story: Is It A Zombie? or Practically Nude Man Sleepwalking in Snow!

Is It A Zombie? or Practically Nude Man Sleepwalking in Snow!

What most people saw in the Massachusetts Wellesley College area was a practically naked man either sleepwalking or in a frozen Zombie-like Trance! Whatever it was, the Headmaster immediately called the campus police and the local sheriff, who m...
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Funny story: Francis Bacon portrait of his cat 'Rasher' set to sell for a hundred million bucks

Francis Bacon portrait of his cat 'Rasher' set to sell for a hundred million bucks

New York - A Manhattan auction house estimates Bacon's classic 1969 oil on canvas portrait of his pussycat Rasher will be a runaway hundred million dollar success at their forthcoming sale this week. NYC auctioneers Dribble & Gavel say they ha...
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Funny story: Mystery of what Henry Moore "Jay Lo" sculptures are is solved by Optician

Mystery of what Henry Moore "Jay Lo" sculptures are is solved by Optician

The huge sculptures in Leeds resembling pregnant nude women with enormous bottoms are the result of the notoriously incomprehensible sculptor not being fitted with the correct spectacles, a spokesperson for Specsavers claimed this morning. "...
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Funny story: Australian Culture Gurus on fact finding tour of La Gambia

Australian Culture Gurus on fact finding tour of La Gambia

Australia, keen to lose its Barbecue and Beers image has assembled a cultural fact finding team to "find out what this culture lark is". The team will visit selected countries with what it imagines to have a more impressive global Intellectual pr...
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Funny story: Armed Police mistake colour chart for missing Damien Horst colour spot painting

Armed Police mistake colour chart for missing Damien Horst colour spot painting

Armed art trained police swooped on a decorators van in Notting Hill this morning. Mr. C. Mycrack told our reporter, "I had this Crown Paints gloss colour chart in the back of my van, its just a kind of large sheet of coloured circles that my custome...
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Man declared dead wakes up in morgue body bag

A bloody miracle, says the mortician, considering I was about to inject him with two gallons of formaldehyde

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