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Funny satire stories about Armageddon

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Funny story: Google Becomes Main Source Of Knowledge In Universe; God Steps Down.

Google Becomes Main Source Of Knowledge In Universe; God Steps Down.

Accumulating a huge mass of knowledge in its 17 years of existence, the Internet giant Google has officially made itself the greatest source of knowledge in the entire universe, surpassing even that of Douglas Adam's giant planet computer in Hitchhik...
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Funny story: Sale at Svalbard 'Doomsday vault'

Sale at Svalbard 'Doomsday vault'

The entire contents of the Svalbard 'Doomsday' vault are set to be sold at an auction for millions of eager bidders. Svalbard is widely known to be the largest storage vault in the world, containing more than 800000 worldly treasures. It was first...
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Funny story: God Cancels Doomsday!

God Cancels Doomsday!

For the second time in as many millenniums the good Lord has put the kibosh on Doomsday. Said Lord God, "Full scale death shall be dealt not now nor anytime in the next 1000 years." Specialty television programmers such as the History Channel are...
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Funny story: Apocalypse Entrepreneur Offers $3m Bunker To Racketeering NYC Lawyer Steven Donziger

Apocalypse Entrepreneur Offers $3m Bunker To Racketeering NYC Lawyer Steven Donziger

New York - If the world comes to an end in 2015 for convicted RICO lawyer Steven Donziger, where on earth could he turn to? That is the karmic poser being studied by the office of the United States Attorney for the Southern District of New York...
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Funny story: Jihadis' apocalyptic end-of-days HQ of Dabiq sitting on 'Holy Hand Grenade Of Antioch' sinkhole say Wiccans

Jihadis' apocalyptic end-of-days HQ of Dabiq sitting on 'Holy Hand Grenade Of Antioch' sinkhole say Wiccans

Dabiq - A World Council of Wicca elder has written to Islamic State bigwigs about their adherents flocking to the Syrian border personality town of Dabiq scene of an ancient 7th century Sunni prophecy about Judgement Day. Mother Superior says she...
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Funny story: End of The Universe?

End of The Universe?

Scientists at the Hadron Particle Accelerator outside Geneva, Switzerland are all excited at being given 'permission' to conduct a "ground breaking" particle experiment in the 27 kilometre long tunnel. Lead particles will be accelerated at veloci...
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Funny story: Doomsday nut Harold Camping's final prediction warned Mayan Calendar prophecy 'only one year out'

Doomsday nut Harold Camping's final prediction warned Mayan Calendar prophecy 'only one year out'

Oakland, California - It's a roller coaster ride to Armageddon this Winter Solstice weekend with the publication of failed Apocalyptic prophet Harold Camping's final deathbed rant exonerating the 2012 Mayan Calendar fiasco as 'slightly out of sync'.
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Funny story: The New Atomic Bomb called "Cuddles"

The New Atomic Bomb called "Cuddles"

"Cuddles" they call it... the new bomb developed by NUKEM a pan American-European nuclear research station based near Berne in Switzerland. Yesterday, the United Nations voted for its use "should the situation demand it". "Global-I" talked to managing director of NUKEM, and Nobel Prize winning physicist, Dr. Kant Getiton. "Can you describe what Cuddles actually is? How does it differ from othe...
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Funny story: On Heels of Michael Bay 'Armageddon' Apology Comes Greater Apology From the Woman Who Birthed Michael Bay

On Heels of Michael Bay 'Armageddon' Apology Comes Greater Apology From the Woman Who Birthed Michael Bay

HOLLYWOOD, CA - On the heels of controversial director Michael Bay apologizing for making his oft-maligned science fiction 'epic' - "Armageddon" (Touchstone Pictures, 1998) - now Bay's mother is following in her son's footsteps by announcing her expr...
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Funny story: POTUS Live From The Rose Garden Via My Y-Phone

POTUS Live From The Rose Garden Via My Y-Phone

Sent From My Y-phone Washington, DC POTUS will momentarily begin speaking to assembled reporters here in the Rose Garden. POTUS is walking to the podium with the Nuclear Football. He opens it and takes out a big red push-button with an antenna sticking out of it and sets the red button on top of the podium. Is he Fkng crzy ? "Good afternoon everyone. Lester, that includes you too. I be...
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Funny story: Forget Global Warming, Meteors. US Congress Biggest Threat to Planet

Forget Global Warming, Meteors. US Congress Biggest Threat to Planet

BRUSSELS, BELGIUM. A report published by the Brussels, Belgium-based International Union of Really Worried Scientists calculates the destructive power of the US Congress as equivalent to an eight-mile wide meteor hitting Earth. The report warns th...
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Funny story: Discovery of New Mayan Calendar Updates Doomsday Prophesy

Discovery of New Mayan Calendar Updates Doomsday Prophesy

Archeologists have discovered a new Mayan calendar - the Beach Babes Bikini Edition - that provides a new, and more reliable, date for the end of the world: June, 2014. Discovering the calendar also proves that the Mayan's much publicized prophes...
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Funny story: The Final Pope Is Coming!!!

The Final Pope Is Coming!!!

Hysteria has been caused in some areas of the United States and in Ireland by the resignation of Pope Benedick the 16th. The Mayor of Boston,Thomas Menino has had to contend with the blizzard and now wacky rumours that we are entering the end times.
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Funny story: Mayan apocalypse: Bruce Willis and Sigourney Weaver voted favourites to save us

Mayan apocalypse: Bruce Willis and Sigourney Weaver voted favourites to save us

The online poll of 2,000 Brits carried out by EndPoll for online movie provider 'blankbox', revealed that 57% of people were aware of the Mayan prophecy of the apocalypse and 13% confessed to being worried. More than one in four respondents put th...
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Funny story: Bookies Offering New Odds on Armageddon

Bookies Offering New Odds on Armageddon

Several UK Bookmakers have spread their interest in the latest developments in the Savile case. They are now offering odds on the following: (1) Many Freemasons and some of those who run their organization particularly those living in Scotland are corrupt. 1/10 (2) Many lawyers and barristers operating in the UK and some judges and their peers are corrupt. 1/10 (3) Many working in the Sec...
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Funny story: World Ends!!! - Planet Earth destroyed in cosmic blast

World Ends!!! - Planet Earth destroyed in cosmic blast

New York - In an emergency appearance today before the United Nations, a team of international scientists reported that the world has ended. The stunning announcement came during a special session of the UN Security Council, during which scientists f...
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Funny story: We're all doomed - Washington the end of the world

We're all doomed - Washington the end of the world

White House sources admitted, late Tooosday [Gesundheit! -Ed], that it's just not worth it. Said spokesman Ed Havenuff, "Ladies and gentlemen, we have to face facts. The World finds itself trying to navigate a well-known stream without a means of...
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Funny story: Doomsday "Prophet" Harold Camping Postpones Rapture To October 21, 20-*Cough Cough*

Doomsday "Prophet" Harold Camping Postpones Rapture To October 21, 20-*Cough Cough*

ALAMEDA, CA-In the wake of his failed prediction of a May 21, 2011 world end date, Harold Camping took to his radio show to inform the people that the world would now end on October 21, 20-HUHK HUHK HUHK, HUHK HUHK, HUHK HUHK. Camping made it cle...
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Donald Trump fails to sign pledge not to run for King in 2016

Republican presidential hopeful, Donald Trump, announced Today that he has not signed a pledge not to run for King.
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