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Funny satire stories about American Airlines

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FAA Investigates Van Crash

MON AMI, FLORIDATED — In an attempt to cut costs, Amerikan Airlines drove a wingless passenger van off a four-story parking garage at Mon Ami International Airport. The fifty-year-old pilot, Mahatma Kane Jeeves, who asked to remain anonymous, sust...

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Americant Arlines offering special travel package to pilots

Funny story: Americant Arlines offering special travel package to pilots

Fort Worth, Texas - Americant Airlines spokesperson (she rides a bicycle to work) Marsheesha Aliboboosa announced today to a group of frazzled, jet lagged reporters a new travel discount program. Pilots and their friends, up to fifty of them, fly...

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American Airlines Moves to Inconvenience Based Frequent Flier Program

Funny story: American Airlines Moves to Inconvenience Based Frequent Flier Program

American Airlines, in an effort to keep up with competitor's complete disregard for customer service, has decided to overhaul their frequent flyer program. The airline will now award miles based on money spent and inconveniences endured in effort to...

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American Airlines "Terrorist" Code Cracked

An American Airline flight was delayed for more than two hours after a passenger identified a terrorist on board sending cryptic messages written in Arabic. Our roving reporter bribed authorities and managed to get a copy of his message. This...

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Americant Airlines doesn't want you in the cabin

Funny story: Americant Airlines doesn't want you in the cabin

Spokesman Ann T. Sociale of Americant Airlines revealed a new price structure for domestic flights. The move is thought by staff here to be in response to a recent policy shift by another well known airline favoring passengers that do not bring bags...

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American Airlines Sue Orbitz

Funny story: American Airlines Sue Orbitz

Fort Worth based American Airlines has filed an antitrust lawsuit against the online travel site Orbitz. American Airlines is calling the travel site a monopoly despite the fact most people probably use Priceline since they have funnier ads that fea...

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Tower To AA Flight 2253: "Stop, Stop. Hey, Stop. Stop. Stop! STOP!! STOP!! Sh-t."

Funny story: Tower To AA Flight 2253: "Stop, Stop. Hey, Stop. Stop. Stop! STOP!! STOP!! Sh-t."

The National Transportation Safety Board has opened an investigation into an incident in which a passenger jetliner that had landed at Jackson Hole Airport in Wyoming failed to stop after touchdown on Thursday. "We're American Airlines... ...cove...

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American Airlines downsizing fleet, upsizing fear

As American Airlines canceled more than 1,000 flights this week to inspect wiring on its jets, the company made good on its pledge to disrupt passengers' schedules as little as possible by contracting with owners of single-engine planes and crop-...

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American Airlines Bringing Back Old Prop Planes, Sans Cabin Pressure!

Funny story: American Airlines Bringing Back Old Prop Planes, Sans Cabin Pressure!

St. Louis - American Airlines announced today it is cutting orders with Boeing and purchasing 50 moth balled relics stored in the Mohabi desert. They will spend $10,000 per plane to have them shipped on a container ship to China, where they will be r...

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Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, New Stewardess on Virgin American Airlines

Funny story: Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, New Stewardess on Virgin American Airlines

Ruetours Press - Virgin American Airlines is hiring psuedo celebrities to serve as crew members on their maiden "virgin" flights between New York and Los Angelos.

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McDonalds Wins Bid to Serve Food on UA and AA Airlines

Funny story: McDonalds Wins Bid to Serve Food on UA and AA Airlines

Friendly Skies News - Today McDonalds announced that they have struck a deal to begin serving their full menu on United Airlines and American Airlines. The news is a bit of a shock since both airlines have been cutting back severely on perks, such as...

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Bush Selects American Airlines to Demonstrate "Trickle Down Economics"

Funny story: Bush Selects American Airlines to Demonstrate "Trickle Down Economics"

American Airlines is announcing that, this month, its top executives will split close to $200 million in stock bonuses while workers will get nothing. The profit for American Airlines last year was $231 million.

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Merger of Air America with American Airlines to Form Left-Wing Airline Fails

Funny story: Merger of Air America with American Airlines to Form Left-Wing Airline Fails

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Air America Radio, the liberal talk show network currently facing bankruptcy and which was attempting to merge with American Airlines, announced today the merger talks had halted. The merger would have created the world's firs...

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Airline Service "Crashes"

Funny story: Airline Service "Crashes"

American Airlines announced Thursday that they will no longer offer pillows for passengers on any of their flights. "We can save up to 375,000 dollars a year by dropping the pillows. Blankets, however, will still be available," an airline spokesman...

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Breaking news…

Bill Cosby Contacts Kim Kardashian to See if She Can Get Him Pardoned

Kim told Cosby he would have to get in line behind Robert Mueller, Suge Knight, and Jared Folger.
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